towerofanimus | [CLOSED] a pupil seeking answers

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[CLOSED] a pupil seeking answers

Characters: Master Xehanort and [OU] Ventus
Setting: Floor 19
Format: prose I think IDK MII TELL ME IF YOU GET TIRED OF SILLY INTROSPECTION
Summary: Ven has been waiting near on ten years for some answers, and Master Xehanort is no doubt manipulating the situation to his own, evil little advantage.
Warnings: Xehanort existing, ~~gratuitous use of heartbadtouch gloves~~, Xehanort existing.

Ven was more familiar with the Tower, so it was up to him to find somewhere "secure." Which was kind of hard, to be honest; in the end, he settled on the library on the Nineteenth floor; it was quiet at the least, and most people used the library on the third floor, since it was the one with the computers. He wasn't sure if it was secure persay, but he hung out in both of the libraries all of the time with Roxas, and nothing had ever gone bad because of the library itself. And at the least, it was easy to rush up or down the floors should the need arise. He still didn't know how he felt, and he wanted answers, but that didn't mean Ven was completely trusting of the man yet.

So he led the old man up to the Nineteenth Floor, looking around to make sure no one was around. When he confirmed the coast was clear, he turned back to Master Xehanort, looking at him expectantly with a furrowed brow. He was expecting an explanation of Xehanort's motives, and damn if he was going to go anywhere or let this go until he got it.

"Well?"

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Ventus had indeed grown stronger and it showed. The Ventus of old would never have been able to come this far, demanding answers no matter the cost. How unlike his complacent Master too. Perhaps his original selection of Ventus as an apprentice had been wise after all. While the boy hadn't been properly useful then, he had certainly shaped up to it.

This was the library that Xehanort preferred; the subject matter was of higher calibre and it was much more quiet. An appropriate place for the transfer of forbidden, secret knowledge. He nodded in approval at Ventus' choice, walking in a semicircle for a moment in his usual hunched pose as though thinking. This was the hardest part, of course. Just how much to divulge, and in what way so as not to send the boy off. It would be difficult, to be sure.

But first, precautions.

"Before I begin, I must ensure your compliance." A quick look over his shoulder with a tight expression. "What I will reveal to you here must not leave this room. You are to tell no one."

Ven wasn't necessarily an impatient person, but he certainly had his moments. Usually he didn't pry so much, but at this point, he just felt entitled, if not simply downright curious. So he was a bit fidgety while Xehanort was pacing, and he finally spoke, he didn't take that long to reply.

"I won't tell anyone." Supposedly no one would listen to him if he did try, but that didn't matter much now. Saying that he would go around telling everyone he knew would get him nowhere and defeat the whole purpose of finding the library anyway. "Promise."

Xehanort didn't even turn to look at him again. "Swear on the key I passed to you." A test of mettle. Lightbearers took those things quite seriously, after all.

"--Huh?"

OK that, kind of caught him off guard, admittedly. A bit of doubt creeped in but...No, he wasn't going to turn back now. That would've made everything pointless.

Ven held his hand out in front of him, and in a flash of light, Wayward Wind materialized between his fingers. "...I swear-- on this key you passed to me, I won't tell anyone."

A moment to hide the grin creeping across his face, and then he turned to face Ventus, resting his hands on the smooth surface of a table. His fingers still managed to easily find the grains of the wood even through his gloves and they traced the patterns slowly as he spoke, his voice quiet and contemplative.

"Tell me, my boy, what do you know about light and darkness in the universe?"

When Xehanort turned back around, Ven allowed the keyblade to disappear once again, as he thought about the question.

"Everything in this world is made up of Light and Darkness. We live in the Realm of Light, and the Heartless live in the Realm of Darkness. The inhabitants of the Realm of Darkness seek to destroy the light and everyone in it. It's our job, as Keyblade Bearers, to protect the Realm of Light and the safety of its inhabitants from those that would try to harm and threaten them. And every heart has both light and darkness inside them."

It was a textbook answer, and facts that were basically second nature all his life. Though he stopped a moment, looking away before continuing. "The Keyblades we use are from the Realm of Light. Master Eraqus taught us that the Darkness was evil and-- I'm pretty sure that's true most of the time. But I don't think that's always the case."

Xehanort considered his words carefully. It was very pedantic, the sort of pablum he expected Eraqus to regurgitate for his apprentices. At a very basic level it was rooted in the truth, but of course it had been twisted by the wiles of those too deeply steeped in the light.

A quiet chuckle, then. This was a common thought, he was sure, but most did nothing more than retain it as quiet personal sentiment. It was still a good place to begin, though.

One hand raised over his heart, the other still tracing the surface of the table. "You're correct. All hearts have both light and darkness in them. That is the way of such things. In fact--" he pulled his hand away from his chest, clenching his fingers into a fist "this is a fact people overlook. No matter the predominance of one or the other, there is always both. This is how it is meant to be. Both inside and out..." And a grand, sweeping gesture with his hand, his words gaining a bit of energy. "Light and Dark are one and the same, the core principles of the universe. They are meant to exist together in unity, binding us into a great Whole--"

He turned, his hand dropping back down to curl at his back in its habitual position. "Alas that they cannot."

"Because they're always trying to destroy each other?" Ven suggested, in an attempt to try and piece it together. He wasn't entirely sure if them being the same thing made sense-- after all, even though they were similar forces, the difference between what was Light and what was Dark was usually pretty clearly drawn. Even if he had some friends who were Darkness, it just meant they were Dark, not Light. Easy enough.

"Or because everyone thinks one is better than the other or something?" He tried once more. That seemed to be the case with both of his Masters at least, and Vanitas too.

"Destroy? No, Ventus. They do not truly seek to destroy each other at all." He turned back, giving Ven a level gaze, fingers reaching out to drum against the tabletop as he straightened up fully. "They simply seek to exist in balance. No more of one than the other. That darkness appears aggressive in its motives is simply an act of imbalance."

Jewels in the rough, Xehanort decided. Riddled amongst the cliches were the occasional seeds of truth, waiting to be polished and brought forth. Perhaps this would make swallowing the truth easier to bear. The insight of youth as opposed to the years of stasis wallowing in light brought.

"People assign them values because they do not understand their purposes. Light is treasured while darkness is reviled. Thus light gains superiority, and those who have been consumed by it twisted, desiring nothing else but. They seek to stomp out the shadows cast by light, to destroy darkness forever."

"So...because the Light is stronger, the Darkness is aggressive because it's trying to assert a balance again?" Huh. That kind of made sense.

Still, that didn't exactly sit right with him. Perhaps it was just the lasting impression of being raised by Master Eraqus, but the Darkness had never seemed exactly...stable, at the least.

"Why does the Light want to destroy Darkness forever then?" And frankly he wasn't sure the Darkness was totally innocent of wanting total destruction either, but that wasn't too important for now. "There's gotta be some reason, right?"

Good, he was catching on quickly. "Exactly. Were it the other way around, and darkness the dominant force, then we would see similar actions from the light." There was food for thought, turning the world on its head a moment to the perspective of one trained to follow the light.

Now, how to address the next part... this would be the telling point. What came from this would determine everything else.

"Light has no desire of its own, Ventus. It simply exists to balance darkness, to be a part of the world. It's the desire of those who have fallen to the light - yes, fallen, just as easily as one can fall to to darkness. Complex living beings assign meaning to where there should be none. Our kind, other sentients, we wrought ruin on the universe as a whole due to giving the light the meanings and traits that were desirable and leaving darkness with what was not. Light does not seek to destroy darkness, it is those who hold light of highest regard that seek to destroy darkness."

"Huh?" OK he understood how Light might behave the same way as Darkness in a world where both were flipped (despite how...weird, that was to imagine), but now he's officially lost.

"How's that possible? The Keyblades we use are from the Light-- even if we inherit them from others, they're still essentially from the Light." He scratched and shook his head. "And even if that is right, how could Light bring ruin because of 'meanings' we give it? Isn't giving something meaning a good thing? I don't remember seeing anyone with Light ruin a world or anything."

He chuckled low in his throat, raising his hands, fingers curling slightly as though grasping the air. "Those fallen to the light are not apt to destroy worlds because they do not associate light with destruction. They simply wallow in their own zeal and stasis, refusing change no matter how beneficial, sooner attacking the shadows the sun casts at their feet than admitting even that meaningless darkness belongs to them!" He slammed his hands on the table emphatically. "This is the flaw of the Keyblade Order, my boy, and why the truth of the matter is considered high heresy!"

He stopped for a moment, letting his fingers trail over the surface of the table, before raising a hand in a casual gesture, pondering how to answer the other question.

"There are keyblades of darkness as well, Ventus, and other keyblades that straddle the bridge just as the Realms Between brace Light and Darkness. We play guardians, protectors, "chosen" by the light with the keys we wield--" and the hand closed into a fist with an almost audible snap " --but instead we have deluded ourselves for centuries into believing we are doing the universe a service in the name of defending the oh-so-beleaguered light! The universe suffers under a yoke of unbalance that spiralled out of control eons ago, and that no one has seen fit to attempt to correct due to generations of staid tradition and teachings of the malignity of darkness."

When Xehanort slammed the table, Ven jumped a bit, though it was little more than being startled while he was deep in thought. Really, he thought he had on it before, but all of this...just...didn't quite make sense to him. Though, keyblades of darkness? that was a bit hard to believe. Then again, Vanitas probably had one, he supposed.

"How is it bad if those who use the Light don't associate it with destruction?" He asked, shrugging and opening his arms in a questioning gesture. "Even if everything's out of balance, at least that means the Light won't destroy things. Even if the Darkness is trying to reassert order, it's trying to do that at the risk of hurting people-- and the people who use the light are trying to protect them. Even if the unbalance is bad, isn't fixing it by hurting a lot of people even worse?"

"Do you think the problem will go away if you simply ignore it?" He turned, hunching again, going back to pacing in that loose semi-circle. "This is what all keyblade wielders believe, that darkness is to be destroyed. With each sliver of darkness removed, the light grows stronger and the universe becomes more fractured!" He swept around, gesturing broadly. "We may not associate light with destruction, but it is not a creative element. Creation and destruction go hand in hand, Ventus! The day that the last traces of shadow leave our universe is the day it dies! Is the hurt of a few now worth more than the lives of the worlds themselves?"

Ven frowned a bit more, gradually growing more and more upset by this conversation. No, he did not like what this all meant at all.

"Ignoring it won't make it go away but...!" He shook his head. "But ruining people's lives just in the name of fixing it isn't right either!" Especially since it was his life damnit--!!

"There's gotta be another way to fix it! If Creation and Destruction go together, then both Light and Darkness can be Creation and Destruction too! Can't they both just coexist, instead of hurting the other side just to re-assert what's right?"

He hung his head for a moment in thought. It was clear that Ventus was still clinging to the teachings of light that had been thoroughly drilled into him. If there was one thing he couldn't fault Eraqus for, it was his zeal. Unfortunately, it could only carry him so far before he too fell.

"One of the lessons you must learn as a master is that the needs of the many often outweigh the needs of the few. Even Eraqus has had to make that choice, and it is difficult and painful no matter what the decision is for." He looked back up, regret tainting his features once more. "Many things seem as though they are terrible, but the results will ensure the ultimate good. Even if it means sacrificing ourselves."

He turned to face Ventus full on now, taking a few steps forward in as non-threatening a manner as he could. "I've spent my lifetime trying to find a way to restore the balance of our broken universe. The supremacy of light is so strong that anything that speaks of such matters is forbidden. The only answers I could find were down the unspeakable history of the Keyblade Wars..."

Now was where it would get interesting. Ventus' emotions were already inflamed. How much more could the boy take before he snapped?

"Forcing something isn't how you fix it!" His voice was raising in volume now, to the point where he was almost yelling. He checked himself, and lowered it before continuing-- but the anger and indignation that had been there was still loud and clear. "If you try and force something like that, it's just going to make it more broken! People will resent that side for being cruel, making people more likely to serve the other side even more! You can't sacrifice someone on your own without their say so just because you think it'll fix the universe!!"

He took a deep breath-- trying to calm himself down, before continuing. "What Keyblade War?" His tone was considerably less amused, and even more impatient.

That was the limit, it seemed. Too much at once would do more harm than good. The boy couldn't reconcile the information with what he'd had burned into him by the light. He sighed deeply, turning away from Ventus once again, hands clasped tightly behind his back.

"The light does just that, and yet no one takes up issue with it. I see now that I should speak no further. Your emotions get the better of you and taint your perception. I warned you that this was a difficult truth... perhaps you are not ready for it."

"Stop treating me like a child!" And that seemed to anger him even more than the other stuff. Or at least the part that broke the camel's back.

"I know more than you think I do, and I understand more than you think I do! If everything you say is accurate that still doesn't justify anything you did! You supposedly know the whole truth of the universe, but just because other people are being cruel doesn't give you the right to! If you think you're entitled to hurt people just because you know the truth, that makes you the one whose perception is tainted! Even if you want to fix the universe you're not protecting anyone!"

He had his own sweeping gestures now, and even if he didn't want to admit it, his emotions were completely flying off the handle. "If you were so high and mighty and better than the 'Lightbearers' you would see that!!"

"The whole truth?" A low chuckle. "Even if I wanted to know the whole truth, it is impossible. So little information remains. I know what I know from years of research and digging and looking. I combed for every possible solution I could find. I even spoke with my dearest brother on the matter, but he rejected the truth completely and chose to try to strike me down. It was then that I knew I had to act alone, and could not tell anyone..."

The steam seemed to run out of him then and he sagged against a table, bracing himself against it with his arms to stay upright. "No, Ventus, you are right. I have committed grave sins in my quest to try to restore balance to the universe. I have harmed you - my own apprentice - and your pupil siblings. It was a shameful act... my intentions were all for the protection of all living things, but the execution..."

"If this is how you were going to fix things then I can understand why Master Eraqus rejected it...!" He said out of anger. His rage was boiling but even in the face of the man who had taken him in and almost destroyed his heart and wanted to turn him into a weapon-- even the anger quelled and eventually he was just trying to hold back tears.

"I-It's just not fair...!! And I don't care if you say life isn't fair, nothing you ever did was fair!"

He winced, allowing himself that emotion, a tear trickling down the darkened skin of his cheek. "No, Ventus, life isn't fair. If it was fair then neither of us would have this pain or cause to be riven apart so. The universe is simply so steeped in the stasis of light that only great calamity can force it from its calcification..." he trailed off with a muffled sound. "The harm I have committed is unforgivable. At least here, far away from it all, there is moment to reflect on these things and how they came to be."

A pause for a moment, attempting to regain apparently lost composure. "Forgive me for my ramblings, Ventus. I am an old man who has a weary soul and far too much on his mind. Sharing this information reminds me of why I needed to fight, rather than what I must do to amend the horrors I have done."

For a good long moment Ven simply stared, halfway between glaring and just watching expectantly. Then, he brought up his arm and rubbed at his eyes in a meager attempt to hide the emotions that were plainly obvious.

"Well at least something good came out of it then," He spat with an uncharacteristic amount of venom in his voice, though after that he seemed to ease up on the anger despite still being visibly upset.

"It's fine," He said with a shake of his head. "I was the one that asked anyway."

There's something almost intoxicating about the anger coming from him, the anger that he'd once demanded the boy produce. A shame, really, that his original purpose had been given away. He did have the potential for it, it just took far too much effort to draw it out.

"No, my boy. I have no right to ask for your forgiveness. That you have given me your ear this long humbles me."

A moment of pause, his head raising as if thinking of something. "Ah, but I didn't finish... but perhaps that is for the better. It has been distressing enough for you as it is. The folly of my life's work is meaningless enough with further detailing it."

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[CLOSED] a pupil seeking answers

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