...A rewind, then. [He stops at the elevator, hands both deep in his pockets now. He can practically feel the disappointment coming from his other self despite trying to ignore it the best he can. In doing so, he was focusing on the words he picked for when he spoke to Yosuke about it.]
The first week... we were all forced to watch no matter how much we struggled or tried to stop them from getting to our friends. Kind of hard, when you're locked up inside a cell. When we were selected for 'surgery', the retrieval units paralyze us ahead of time. All they did was drill a hole in my forehead and inject me with something. That's all.
[The tone is eerily familiar to Adachi's little 'explanation' now, isn't it... He seems to realize it and shakes his head.]
But then... all of them began to whisper, to say things were fine. Everything was acceptable; the numbness and pain caused by hearing their cries was reality and we had to accept it. ...I couldn't, and it drove me over the edge to see another person barely being able to breathe when all I had to do was try and tune them out.
[Now that time had passed and there was time to contemplate his actions, he knew how much he fucked up. He didn't need anyone else to tell him that.]
I did my best to make up for it, in spite of Alice wanting to "play" with the others... in spite of Lucifer whispering words of doubt and Izanagi's disapproval. I was about to burn everything but the people trapped with me when the retrieval units came for me again.
...And on the contrary, I think it is time to talk about comics.
[He glanced back to her, and while there was pain in his eyes... the resolve behind it was much more fierce.]
You see, when you're trapped in a literal hell, being forced to watch and listen as even kids only a couple years older than Nanako being experimented on and mutilated, you tend to draw back on ideas when your powers are stripped away. One of those kids and I tried to replicate it on Jason's face and got our group disqualified along with someone else who killed one of her friends to try and spare her from further torment. Not that I agree with it now that I'm lucid again, but I can understand why she tried.
no subject
The first week... we were all forced to watch no matter how much we struggled or tried to stop them from getting to our friends. Kind of hard, when you're locked up inside a cell. When we were selected for 'surgery', the retrieval units paralyze us ahead of time. All they did was drill a hole in my forehead and inject me with something. That's all.
[The tone is eerily familiar to Adachi's little 'explanation' now, isn't it... He seems to realize it and shakes his head.]
But then... all of them began to whisper, to say things were fine. Everything was acceptable; the numbness and pain caused by hearing their cries was reality and we had to accept it. ...I couldn't, and it drove me over the edge to see another person barely being able to breathe when all I had to do was try and tune them out.
[Now that time had passed and there was time to contemplate his actions, he knew how much he fucked up. He didn't need anyone else to tell him that.]
I did my best to make up for it, in spite of Alice wanting to "play" with the others... in spite of Lucifer whispering words of doubt and Izanagi's disapproval. I was about to burn everything but the people trapped with me when the retrieval units came for me again.
...And on the contrary, I think it is time to talk about comics.
[He glanced back to her, and while there was pain in his eyes... the resolve behind it was much more fierce.]
You see, when you're trapped in a literal hell, being forced to watch and listen as even kids only a couple years older than Nanako being experimented on and mutilated, you tend to draw back on ideas when your powers are stripped away. One of those kids and I tried to replicate it on Jason's face and got our group disqualified along with someone else who killed one of her friends to try and spare her from further torment. Not that I agree with it now that I'm lucid again, but I can understand why she tried.