towerofanimus | I'm sick to the bone

Characters: Minato, his Shadow and anyone!
Setting: Floor 14 (Media), September 12th
Format: Starting in brackets, will match
Summary: Even the “perfect” leader isn’t immune to his Shadow.
Warnings: Minato’s Shadow, eventual violence

[The media floor. Often a floor of distraction, a place where people would indulge in escapism from the cruelty the tower brings.

And yet, there’s something odd.

In one area of the floor, a song can be heard playing loudly for all to hear.

"Nobody's topping me
you know it damn right
Most of y'alls loving me
doing it all night”

As the song plays, it may switch between different versions of the same song. The beat is the same, but the lyrics would differ.

And in the middle of this area are two Minatos.]

I wonder what everyone would think of us, if they know? What lies behind their perfect leader’s careful masks.

[Minato’s silent, watching his Shadow speak. His Shadow touches the armband on his own arm, smiling fondly.]

The source of your powers...and why you never seem to be afraid? We both know why, me. You’re the leader, you can’t afford to show weakness. The voices have spoken, the voices nudges, and you followed because you’re addicted.

[The song ends and starts again. Or is it? The lyrics seemed different this time.]

...Addicted? [He knows what his Shadow means, somewhere at the back of his mind, but he still asked.]

That wonderful feeling of growing closer and watching your Social Links grow. The feeling of happiness when you know you’re important to someone. That feeling when you’re less lonely now, after years of being distant from people. Who would be friends with a boy who spoke “deliriously” of a time where the moon turned green, when water became blood and people became coffins, even in his own relatives’ house?

[“Once again, I'm back in the lab
Cleaning my knives ready for stabs”]

That’s why I keep my silence—
Because no one understands. And let’s not forget about our dear companions, the voices…

[The Shadow pause, as the music reach a peak. Then his yellow eyes glance over. Oh, he noticed they’re not alone.]

...the voices who continue to grant you power from your bonds. [That earns a reaction from Minato. Speak about his mental state all you want, but when it comes to his friendships--!

But why is it so hard to speak?]

You’re afraid they might think you’re exploiting their trust and friendship.

Quiet.

[What will you do for Minato?]

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[He'd come at a bad time, it seems. But as usual, despite him now needing to wear the Teddieglasses again, he has been checking every floor for more victims. So when he sees the telltale signs of two Minatos that are not Strega and S.E.E.S.—only one of them meeting that categorization.]

...Minato.

[Of all the people to have walked in, it was one of the two others here who would understand that fear of accidentally exploiting their trust and friendship because of their Wild Card abilities—one who already was accused of it by a friend's Shadow.

Thus it doesn't stop him from taking a few stops closer, steeling himself just in case.

'You are not alone.']

[In a snap, Minato looks over at Yu with surprise in his eyes. But somewhat relaxes when he realised it's his friend. All he heard was a voice and feel...afraid of who walked in.]

Yu...

Ah, hello, Yu. My friend. My dear friend who knows.

[In contrast, his Shadow seems happier and more livelier.]

Yeah... I do know that fear, but that's part of being human.

[Yu doesn't stop walking until he is ten feet away, nodding to them both. Even though with that last word, he can feel Izanagi stir within him.]

Everyone draws strength from their bonds.... ours are just in a different way.

[Sorry bro, but he already got this speech from Naoto's. Still got your back, though.]

[Unlike everyone else, the other Wild Cards, his journey was incomplete. His sense of identity haven't been finalised and nurtured far enough before he's whisked away.]

Of course ours are different. For every moment we spend time with our Social Links, we gain more and more power. And...I'm afraid of what they think.

[His eyes darkens, looking far more vulnerable than normal. The real Minato's silent, but forcing himself to stare at his Shadow.]

[That's just the thing, though... no journey was ever complete. If anything, it only begins anew. Yu sighs, closing his eyes for a brief moment as one hand finds itself on his pocket, fingering the small badge in it that he knows Naoto likely doesn't remember giving him... but that's fine. He still trusts her. Just like he trusts the person in front of him.]

I was when I spoke to Hanamura, too... when it slipped out.

[He sighs. Roomie, you really are better than this.]

And he's still my best friend.

Arisato...

[Minato was just Minako's male counterpart. His life had to be similar to hers, an also his own. It wasn't identical, but his problems? Pretty close to his own.]

Arisato! You're not alone in this.

[He's better than this, but there's that nagging thought. Long since ignored until now.]

I'm so glad for that...but I wonder if I can do the same, too? If I can talk with someone who knows me, not Minako.

It'd be awkward, when both of them knows her.

Isn't this what Minako feel like, back in the Underworld? [The awkward pain of them knowing her instead of him.] Without anyone who knows me, it's like being alone again. Alone and envious.

I know.

[If it's not the voices, or the Social Links, it's her. Minato thought he have come to terms with the implications in their existence.]

[Minato quickly looks at his senpai, both relieved and nervous at once. He must calm down, must calm down...]

Yeah, I know.

Ah, hello, Akihiko-senpai. It's so nice to see you alive and well. [The Shadow give him a pleasant, yet unsettling smile.] I wonder, how much did you hear? So I can possibly fill in the blank spots.

['Minato...' He looks at the Shadow, then the real one. To be honest, he doesn't know what it's like. Yuko did though, when she was here. The reminder of her disappearing like the others one day hasn't left him, either.]

...I'm sorry. [This pain and nagging worry, and he had ignored it. Heh... Come to think of it, it almost reminded him of when they saved Yukiko.] ...You aren't alone. No one ever is.

[For what it's worth, he's here... and if his friend needs him to be there for moral support for if he does decide to tell them, then he'll be there.]

I know.

[Compared to Yu and Yuko, a part of him thought him and Minako are always different. Similiar life, yes, but different.]

Hm, Minako...she's always so bright and cheerful. They probably like her better, too. Give people a friendly ear that's actually cute and cheerful, and they flock to her like sheep.

[Consciously or not, Minato's eyes slowly widen. He can deal with loneliness, he can deal with being seen as creepy or disturbing.

But what he can't deal with, especially from all the stress, the memories and his experience in this tower and back in the damnable underworld...!]

I never think of that!

[His self-control slips again, but worst than before.]

I...

[... Yu gives Minato a look. You know the one... It's the stare that says you're treading a thin line and need to calm down, otherwise he won't be able to hold back if they go berserk. That, and he knows that unless the shadow gets it all out in the open... he's only going to hurt more.

Damn it he isn't sure which route to take, but surely Minato remembers that it was him that Yu turned to? Trusted his own glasses to?]

[His Shadow watch Minato, carefully. Say those fatal words...?]

I what?

I-I...

[Calm down, calm down. But with just Yu here, he can admit it.]

I'm afraid of what my friends will think, of my powers and doubting my state of mind because of the voices.

[One at a time. One point at a time.]

And a part of me is...afraid of the implications behind me and Minako's similiar lives. I might be overthinking it, but...it's there.

Same life, same Personas, same accident...we're happy to know about her, but then again, she's better.

That's...what I think.

...

[An inferiority complex, huh? ...Yu sighs, pretty close to punching both of them. Hell, they're both getting pretty darn close to pushing him to the edge when suddenly the implications get even worse.]

But it's wrong. [His face is a schooled neutral, but his voice is anything but.] I don't care who's "better." You're still their friend in your world, right? Would they have picked you to lead them if you weren't good enough and if they didn't trust you?

I'm sick to the bone

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