towerofanimus | Freedom Can Be Confusing

Entry tags:

Freedom Can Be Confusing

Characters:

2nd_dii2ciiple & whoever would like to talk to him!
Setting: Room 2-08 and surrounding areas
Format: Any!
Summary: He's... not quite sure what to make of this
Warnings: slightly broken troll ahoy

The first thing he noticed when he woke was that he was not where he was supposed to be. There was no sign of his control block, or the biowires that should have connected him to his ship. The constant ticking of the computer in the back of his mind was gone as well - he wasn't connected to anything at all.

Panic tried to encroach as his conditioning insisted that he needed to get back to where he belonged right the fuck now, but he fought it off. He hadn't brought himself here, so it wasn't his fault he was disobeying. And flailing around in blind panic wasn't going to get him back to his station any faster.

Besides, if he was very lucky, this might be his opportunity to finally break free of his punishment of slavery. He'd almost lost hope that this moment would ever come.

The distress of finding himself dressed in plain white without even the tiniest indication of his symbol was enough to distract him long enough to read the letters and scout the tiny room. Thankfully a cursory search was more than enough to reveal the clean change of clothes waiting for him in an otherwise empty trunk, and he changed quickly.

Not a single hole for the biowire connectors. No sign of his hated helmet. He felt more like the Ψiioniic than the Helmsman, for the first time in nearly a sweep. Although he couldn't remove the collar, and he assumed the blue colour meant he was now owned by a blue-blood of that shade. It was actually a fairly ingenious method of identification. The problem was that he had no idea who it was, or where to find his new master.

Or, for that matter, why the Condesce would have suddenly decided to sell her most powerful Helmsman.

Time to find out what was going on.

Outside the room he found himself in a corridor full of doors just like the one he'd come out of. He turned to look back at his door, and saw a list of names, presumably the occupants. His was the last.

Right above it was a name he'd thought he would never see again. The Signless.

Just the sight of it was enough to send his panic rushing back in on him, intensified by the forbidden name. He reeled against the wall, staring in shock and disbelief. It couldn't be him. The Signless was dead.

And a part of Ψiioniic had died with him.

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A thud attracted Sollux' attention as he approached his room. He looked up and stopped dead, staring at the tall adult troll who had just impacted with the far side of the corridor.

The troll was wearing yellow, and had four horns.

"Oh...shit," he muttered, and walked down the corridor, approaching the obviously frightened troll. And he asked a question he'd asked already once before. "Are you me?"

Ψiioniic spun around, startled by the unexpected question from behind him. Red and blue crackled between his horns for a moment and his mis-matched eyes glowed brighter, but the moment he saw who he was facing the power died away.

"What... how..." he stammered, beyond shocked. Facing him was an adolescent troll who in every way matched his own memories of himself from that time. The only difference was the dual-coloured glasses the boy wore - and there was a tiny part of Ψiioniic that was jealous he hadn't thought of the idea.

[Kanaya was walking down the hall when she saw him]

Another Sollux?

[Have Dolorosa's descendant]

Dolorosa? [The words are out before he realizes she's too young to be his friend.] Wait, no... who are you?

I'm sorry my name is Kanaya, I don't know who Dolorosa is. Apparently I look like her?

Sollux prepared to defend himself as the troll whirled around and crackled with energy that he recognized. But thankfully there was no need. He smirked wryly and held up his hands in a shrug.

"Fuck if I know, but thith plathe hath been bringing all kindth of people from different univertheth and timelineth. Tho it'th good to know I live to adulthood, I guethh? Athhuming you really are me," he said. Pollux and Castor had already trolled him with that one.

Yeth... only, you're so much younger than her. [He shakes his head and studies her curiously.] I'm called the Ψiioniic. What did you mean, 'another Thollux'?

Naminé had not yet explored every inch of the tower, and although she was curious, her awareness of the dangers present in this place had kept her from doing so for some time. Still, as each day passed and she managed to make her way to the bottom of the tower for meals and all the way back without (much) incident, she began to become more comfortable with the idea of having a more thorough look around. She was aware that there was another set of rooms above hers, and up until that point she had not really had a look.

No better time than the present. When she made her way up the stairs, she did so with a hint of caution, and upon reaching the top, she peeked carefully down the hall, one way and then the other. She knew that it was possible, or even likely, that someone else would be about, but she had not been expecting someone quite like the person she saw pressed against the wall. She was aware of the existence of trolls by now, and she also knew that, despite their slight similarities to Heartless, they seemed to be in no way related. However... this was by far the largest troll she'd ever seen. (Admittedly, this was not much of a title to have; she'd seen so few, after all, and those were all adolescents.) Her trepidation about exploring in the first place and his unusual position kept her rooted in place, quietly observing him.

"I don't know," Ψiioniic said slowly, still studying the other troll. His lisp was still very strong - Ψiioniic had slowly learned to overcome it a bit, though he still only managed to say about every other 's' properly. "If you're me, I mean, though it thertainly seems that way. But altho, I don't know if you should be glad you live this long, if you are me."

Living to adulthood... yes, he was grateful for that. Not for anything would he give up one moment of the time he had spent following the Signless, and all the things he'd learned in that time. But what came after... that part, he wasn't so sure he'd be willing to do again if he could go back and change things.

Except that the former was tied to the latter, and so to have one, he had to have the other.

The Ψiioniic was too busy freaking out to notice the timid alien peering at him from a distance. With his back to the wall he slid down until he was sitting on the floor with his knees pulled up to his chest, hands clutching at his head.

"I can't be," he insisted to himself. "It can't be. He'th dead. He'th dead. This is a dream. It hath to be a dream."

The only problem was that he didn't dream anymore, because he was never allowed to sleep. Hooked up to the computers as a living processor, he didn't need to. So how could he be dreaming?

The way he talked gave Sollux a bit of hope. Maybe he could overcome his own lisp one day, at least a little. He still sounded like a tool, but maybe not as big of one.

"Well, I've already been burned by thith onthe," he said wryly. "Tho let'th thtart with nameth. I'm Thollukth Captor."

I see. Forgive me I don't know who she is. Is she important to you? [a small nod] Sollux is another troll, he looks like you only younger, and, I don't mean to be rude, he has the same lisp as you.

"Sollux Captor?" The Ψiioniic grimaced, trying to make the name mean something to him. There was so much that had already been torn away from him by his time in slavery - both times. But if that had been his name once, for seven or eight sweeps... shouldn't it at least ring a bell? "I'm thorry... I don't remember my adolescent name any more," he admitted with a sigh.

"I'm called... the Ψiioniic," he finished with a bit of a flinch. Just saying that name made his punishment conditioning kick in, but he refused to identify himself as the Helmsman.

He lookth like me? [He's clearly astonished by the thought.] That doesn't really theem possible... anyone else with my mutationth would have been culled, probably.

Naminé found her caution ebbing away as she watched and listened, the current quiet making it easy enough to catch what he was saying to himself. It definitely sounded like he was a newcomer. Her brow knit as sympathy shoved away her discomfort regarding strangers. It seemed like it wasn't that long ago that she was in exactly the same situation, and when that had happened, someone had stopped to talk to her. Shouldn't she do the same for this person, slightly more intimidating than the average stranger or not?

Gingerly, she stepped out from her hiding place and moved just a little closer, enough that it would be easy to spot her. Her collar happened to be violet, and there was nothing to hide it from view due to her simple attire. After taking a brief moment to wish that she was more experienced at this, she worked out a small smile and decided to start off with a gentle, "Hello."

"Huh," Sollux said, frowning perplexedly. What could possibly cause him to forget his own name? Even though he would have changed his name, sure, that wouldn't mean that he would just forget a name he'd had since birth. Maybe this wasn't him, after all. But it was hard to be sure, just from that.

"Well, you have to remember the game, at leatht," he said. "The one that dethtroyed the univerthe. Do you remember that?" This was even shakier, he knew. It was possible they scratched or something and forgot, anyway.

He jumped at the sound, not having any clue that he wasn't alone any longer. He nearly gave himself whiplash as he jerked his head up to stare at her, and red and blue electricity crackled between his horns as he readied himself to deal with whatever threat he was facing. He'd been acting contemptuously vulnerable, and most trolls facing something that pathetic would probably kill it to put it out of their misery.

Instead he found himself facing a completely unthreatening girl, at least as far as he could tell. She was an alien of some kind, with pale, delicate-looking skin and equally pale hair. She didn't even have horns, or sharp teeth, or claws - he was pretty sure she wasn't actually capable of hurting him in any way, unless she was a mage.

He let his power drain away, and ducked his head sheepishly. "Uh, thorry," he murmured. "You thurprised me."

"A game that dethroyed the universe?" Ψiioniic repeated, baffled. "You mean the one Signleth mentions sometimes? But... how could you even know about that? I didn't hear his teachingth until long after I was an adult, and even then he hardly ever talks about that part."

Mutation? Then your blood is candy red and not yellow?

"I what...who?" Sollux stared at Ψiioniic in utter confusion. "Who'th Thignlethh?"

What? No... how did you even... tho you do know the Signless? [He's really confused now. Why would she assume that was the mutation he was talking about unless she knows Signless?] I meant my hornth and... other thingth that are doubled.

Her eyes widened at the display, her body automatically curling inward slightly, like someone expecting to be struck, perhaps even someone used to it. She stayed where she was, though, the smile definitely gone. Even once he relaxed, she stayed tense, at least until he spoke. It was certainly a funny way of speaking, but she made no comment. For a moment, she'd regretted her willingness to help, but... he hadn't actually hurt her. She knew she shouldn't be hasty. "...It's alright." Although it sounded just a little guarded, her expression similar. "I'm sorry-- for surprising you." She took a moment to regard him, as if to make sure he wasn't going to do anything else threatening, then said, with a trace of the gentleness from before along with a hint of caution, "You're new, aren't you?"

"How could you know about the game and the previouth world if you don't know who he ith?" Ψiioniic countered, equally confused. "Um, I think they're thtarting to call him the Sufferer now?" Surely people hadn't already completely forgotten the name of the Signless in favour of his new title?

The thought made him sad. His friend had never wanted 'suffering' to be any part of what he was known for.

He felt bad, he'd obviously scared the fragile little alien. He made a real effort to gentle his tone and expression. "It'th okay, I won't hurt you. I thought you were going to attack me, but I would never hurt you first, I promise."

Her question and the purple collar around her neck told him this might be a fellow slave, and potentially a good source of information. "Yeah, I'm new," he agreed. "I jutht woke up, and I'm really, really confused. I'm called... the Ψiioniic." It took an effort to give that name and not identify himself as 'the Helmsman', and he shuddered with the little shock of pain his programming sent through him as he defied it. "Are you a thlave here, too? You serve a purple-blood?" Technically he supposed that meant she outranked him, if her master was higher than his.

Whoever his actually was.

"What previouth world?" Sollux asked, his confusion still no clearer.

And then his jaw dropped open. "The Thufferer? Holy shit. You knew the Thufferer?"

He took two steps closer, his eyes lighting up a little. "You've got to be my Anthethtor! Wow, I really have an Anthethor!"

Okay, not his chillest moment. But this was really cool.

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Freedom Can Be Confusing

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