towerofanimus | Aftermath

Entry tags:

Aftermath

Characters: Tohko Amano and you.
Setting: Post-event. First the Dorm Floors and then floor seventy-eight.
Format: Prose to start with, but I'll match you.
Summary: Tohko, remembering all that she's done, tries to make amends with whomever she can.
Warnings: You might possibly have a blubbery Tohko, depending upon who you are.

Tohko remembered everything that she had done and tried to do as a drone very, very well. She had tried to kill people, had ordered others about, had been skinned and mutilated like that..and she had tried to kill children, she had tried to kill her best friends! While she loved the photo album, with pictures of her parents, family, and friends..it only made her want to cry even harder, so she left it in her room. Instead, she ran out of her dorm room, biting her lip and carrying her notebook and pen, rushing to the elevator with the intent of heading down.

She had to put things right, now that it was all over. She had to apologize, if she could! Even if it was because of Jason, it was still..terrible that she had done those things..especially to her friends.

When she finally got to the mailroom, Tohko started scribbling notes to the people she knew she had injured and friends that she had seen hurt and mutilated. There were probably network postings that she could look at or even use for this..but Tohko liked using letters, if she could. When she finished one note, she would rip it out and stuff it in a mailbox before starting again.

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With Shion's disappearance, Allen had more or less locked himself up. He left his room to check the network occasionally, moved about the Tower invisibly to keep aware of what was happening, but he hadn't interacted with anyone. That probably would have continued for a while longer, except he caught sight of Tohko running toward the elevator, obviously distressed.

He appeared behind her in an attempt to avoid startling her by suddenly showing up in her line of sight, dressed for once in ordinary, if dated looking, clothes.

"Tohko? Are you alright?"

"Aha, love letters? ✩" The voice came from the stairs, followed by the sound of hands clapping. And sure enough, there he was, his stitches fully replaced. And despite the fact that he had bathed quite throughly just a few hours prior, his skin was still of a slightly more reddish tint; whatever they did to him to ensure he had blood to spare, he had completely abused it, and his skin still wasn't back to its natural color.

Hagire stepped onto the floor, skipping towards Tohko while spinning. "I knew Jason was good, but wow. So nice to hear he loves me enough to think I'm special. He could have worked wonders in Deadman Wonderland! ✩"

Hagire stops a few steps away from Tohko. "What's wrong... did the weak little humans reject you?"

Tohko stopped when she heard Allen's voice and took a deep breath, trying to calm down. It had been awhile since she had last seen the guy, and she didn't want him to worry. But..it was good that he had finally made an appearance. She had wanted to get him into the rebellion somehow, but actually tracking him down was hard on a good day.

Putting on a good mask of a smile she turned around.

"..Not really, to be honest. Have you seen the recent experiment Jason's done to the residents?"

Tohko sighed as Hagire spoke and spun about, and Tohko opted to close her notebook instead of trying to punch him. She wouldn't win a fistfight with Hagire, even though he was horrible.

"I'm not writing love letters, Toto. I don't love anyone romantically right now. I'm writing apology letters. And Jason is not good! Ripping away our free will like that and distorting our bodies is horrible! And what do you mean by that question? If you mean that those who weren't affected were scared, than yes! And they should have been! What he did was horrifying, and I wouldn't blame anyone for being intimidated or scared senseless!"

Edited 2013-04-20 03:48 (UTC)

And this hadn't been a good week. But he kept on his own emotional mask, pretending that Shion's disappearance hadn't left him feeling alone, like something was missing. She obviously had her own things to worry about. So he nodded, glancing slightly away.

"Yeah. I probably should have helped, but I haven't really been feeling like getting into fights. Then again, that's pretty much the usual for me..."

He was by no means afraid to resort to violence, even of the lethal sort. He couldn't afford to be, with what he was. But he still disliked it and some small, irrational part of him continued to think that he wasn't suited to it, even after he had defeated KOS-MOS when she had gone out of control.

No, she... probably wouldn't. Hagire brings a hand to his chin, leaning forward to inspect Tohko's expression. "Whoever said it wasn't free will? I didn't do anything I wouldn't do anyway. I just enjoyed it more. ✩"

Hagire suddenly leaps backwards, and flips onto a nearby table, seating himself in one fluid motion. One of his stitches near the back of his waist below his left rib split with the effort. He grimaced as a result. Okay... need to get used to his body being fragile again, because once again, that actually matters. Damn. All good things must come to an end...

"This place has always been irrational, hasn't it? How is now any different?" Mockingbird tilted his head, bright yellow eyes piercing into hers. "Have you seen my beloved Wretched Egg? She must think what happened to me was so funny."

... for reasons he won't say aloud. That said, the phrase 'not so fun when it's happening to you' comes to mind.

Tohko sighed and nodded, scratching her head.

"I don't blame you..I don't like fighting either, unless I absolutly have to..but Jason decided that it would be fun if he messed with everyone, and mutilated quite a few of us. I was skinned, and he turned me into a literal book girl that was loyal to the Administrators."

That last part should have been enough to get the whole message across. Hopefully.

Tohko sighed as Toto hopped onto the table and scratched her head. "That's true. You would probably be one of the few people I know who would enjoy something like this. However, even this place does have some rationality to it, even if it's odd and hidden in the shadows. Just because we can't see the reason doesn't mean that one isn't there."

As Toto stared at her, Tohko returned it, shaking her head. "I haven't, sadly. But..she would probably enjoy hearing about what you did."

He winced, starting to reach out a comforting hand before pulling back. He wasn't sure if it would help or hurt right now.

"That sounds..." Horrible, terrifying, monstrous. He didn't really have the word. "I'm sorry you had to go through that. But if you need to talk...well, it takes a lot to honestly disturb me these days."

As Tohko approaches the elevator, a huge, looming figure also waits by it. Looking down at the mortal child. The figure huffs, as if exhaling in some muffled way, the armor's heat exchanger backpack making a sympathetic respiration. For the moment, he doesn't speak, he just waist stoically for the elevator to come, a silent figure still reeking of the blood he had spilled, not so very long ago at all.

Tohko looked a little puzzled when he pulled back, but she didn't comment on it. She wouldn't have minded it, but it was his choice to make. The mask of a smile didn't leave.

"It's..I'm not bothered by what they did to my body, to be honest. It's what they did to my head that gets to me. I tried to kill people because I thought they were against the Administrators, I fought with my best friend, and I attacked a little kid who was trying to cheer everyone up!"

Tohko sighed again, trying to calm down. "Sorry..I'm glad you're lending an ear, but I know you have a lot on your plate too. I haven't seen you in awhile..everything holding up alright?"

As Tohko noticed the man standing by the elevator, she tried to calm herself down and put on her usual mask of a smile. It was a little tough, but she had to keep it up for a little while. At least, while she spoke to the guy.

"..Good evening. How are you?"

"I think I had a dream about this place being orderly and logical, once. It was so boring." Honestly, if it was hidden... he'd leave finding it to Woodpecker, if the Administrators decide his presence was needed. And if he knew Wretched Egg... that might be soon.

"I think she'd be more disappointed that I'm not like that anymore. It's not as fun for her if I'm easy to break. This body has such a low endurance for the kind of love she gives. ✩"

"Don't worry about me. I'm dealing with someone disappearing, but...it's something I knew might happen. I'll be fine."

He shook his head, pushing his thoughts of Shion aside for the moment.

"I'm more worried about you. That sort of thing...I don't want to see the guilt break you."

"I endure." He notices the mask, and her seemingly conflicted microexpressions. Having dealt with a young teenager for several months in Hinoto-ri has made him a bit more sensitive to these things.

"And you?"

Well, that got Tohko to shift the focus from herself to Allen quickly. The mask slipped, and Tohko looked concerned.

"Are you sure? Even if you knew it might happen, that doesn't the pain any better. Did..Shion vanish?"

It was just a guess, but it was a good one. However, Tohko sighed and scratched her head, trying to figure out how to best reply to that second statement.

"..I feel horrible about what happened..but I don't think I'll break. Not yet, anyway..I'm more worried about everyone I fought with, to be honest. I hope they're alright now."

Edited 2013-04-20 17:56 (UTC)

Not that Tohko realized he noticed. She had spent several years of her life building up a good, smiling mask. However..at times like these, sometimes it didn't hold up very well.

"..I suppose I'm doing the same. I was involved in the recent experiment though..so I have quite a few people I need to make amends with."

Tohko couldn't help but give Toto a small glare as he spoke about his 'boring' dream.

"And I bet it was a lot safer as well. But..you're right. She wouldn't really be happy if there wasn't a challenge to killing you."

"Humans are such funny creatures. They crave love, despite the pain it brings. It's the most irrational desire there is. Is it really that surprising that I have it, too?"

He claps his hands. Finally, Tohko gets it. "We'll kill each other over and over again, as many times as it takes. How else will we ever learn? ✩"

"Most humans don't think that violence is love like you do. Love can be irrational, but most of the time, people don't stab each another and think that it's love."

Tohko then sighed again. "Learn how to properly love each other?"

"Stabbing is such a narrow example, don't you think?" He scoffs at what she says next. "I think we already know that. After all, her precious lullaby doesn't have an ending. She wants one, and it can only be written in blood. The Woodpeckers tears have so much left to kill. ✩"

"For you, it might be. After all, I don't think stabbing someone means that you love them."

..Well, that left Tohko a little puzzled.

"What lullaby? I don't think Wretched Egg is the type to sing."

"Who knows? But there's only one way to find out."

He leans back, looking at the ceiling. "Oh, she does. Shiro, too. It's such an annoyingly catchy song... especially until recently, it never stopped playing. ✩"

Of course... that's what he thinks.

"Asking the person would probably be best before you actually started doing it."

Once again, Tohko sighed.

"I think I've heard the song Shiro sings..and it's not that annoying. But when was it playing?"

"They wouldn't know it either." Tohko, you're debating love with Hagire. He mentally associates love with violence. Everything you're saying goes way over his head.

"It made the Wretched Egg sleepy. And it's no longer playing, here. That's all you need to know. ✩"

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Aftermath

Dormitory floors

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