towerofanimus | (no subject)

Entry tags:

(no subject)

Characters: Luke (and Amnon) and Tear
Setting: Luke's room in the dormitory.
Format: Started prose.
Summary: After Luke dies again, before talking with Ruana; Luke needs to learn to deal with the reality of everything in front of him.
Warnings: The cries of "FINALLY" may become a little deafening. Just saying.

Luke groaned faintly as he rolled out of bed, finally able to move again after being brought back from the "dead", or at least what passed for it in this place. He reached back, rubbing against the back of his neck as a faint, "Mieu!" suddenly came from the trunk at the foot of his bed. He glanced down, seeing Amnon standing there, his ears wiggling back and forth as he was happy to see Luke again, but Luke... couldn't share in that happiness.

If their bodies weren't real, then... there was no way Amnon was real either. After all, the little cheagle had mentioned not long after he was given to him that he had no memories of Auldrant, only of being put in his trunk. He glanced at the cheagle, before he turned away, getting up and carefully moving his stiff limbs. Amnon let out a faint noise, carefully making his way over to the bed, standing close enough for him to stand up on his hind legs to poke at Luke, wanting attention. Luke let out an aggravated noise as he turned around.

"What?" he demanded.

Amnon took a step back. "Mieu mieu?" he responded, before hesitantly stepping forward, trying to nuzzle against Luke's hand. The redhead snapped his hand away, letting out another annoyed noise.

"Look, can't you just leave me alone right now?" he replied. "I can't... dammit, you're not even real!"

The cheagle let out a hurt sounding noise, backing away again and ducking down like Luke had slapped him. After a moment, his face screwed up, and he stood up on his hind legs, pointing angrily at his owner.

"Mieu! Mimieu mieuuuu! Mieuuu!"

He hopped off of the bed, darting over to the terminal next to the open dorm room. He started pointing angrily at the screen, demanding Luke to log in. For a moment, the noble debated just walking out of the room... but instead he let out an exasperated noise, going over to activate the terminal so the cheagle could peck at the keys with his small paws.

we have fun memories right mieu

doesn't that count as real mieu

Luke stared at the words on the screen, at a loss for how to respond to that. Real memories, hunh...

"I..." he began, but found himself pausing, looking toward the open door. He hadn't realized he had an audience, not until he caught a flash of brown lingering in the doorway. "...Tear?"

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She'd been there since she'd heard he died. She hadn't been with him and he'd died. Since she'd heard the news, she hadn't left from outside his room, hands clenched at her side as she waited for him to reawaken or for someone to be stupid enough to try and come after him again.

When she heard the high-pitched voice of the cheagle, a part of Tear wanted to say something, but she understood how Luke felt. That thing might act like it was alive, but it was a thing of film and lies. And after living her entire life being lied to by the people around her, she didn't know how she felt about the pink cheagle.

When she heard him move from his bed, Tear turned to look into the room. He appeared whole, but she had no idea if that extended to his mental health.

If he paid enough attention, he'd see how red her eyes were and how tired she appeared. As it was, when she spoke, her voice was rough with pent up tears. "Luke..."

She looked like a wreck... and it was his own damn fault, because he couldn't stand up to one monster. For a moment, he looked away, ashamed and afraid to even look at her. His gaze found Amnon again, and he let out a faint coo, motioning for Luke to go for it. He gave the cheagle a look, before he hesitantly returned his gaze toward her, approaching carefully.

"Um... a-are you okay?"

"I-idiot," she said as she closed the distance between them, wrapping him up in a tight hug. "That's my line."

Luke let out a faint noise, not sure how to react. After a moment, however, he reached up, wrapping his arms around her. He wasn't very certain what else to do other than that, rubbing her back slightly.

"...I'm sorry."

She rested her head on his shoulder, eyes closed tightly as she soaked up the feel of his arms around her. Luke had hugged her only a handful of times, and this one almost never, but it felt so familiar, so peaceful.

"You don't have to apologize. I shouldn't have left you alone, Luke. I...I'm so sorry."

"D-don't be silly; even you can't watch me all the time, Tear," he replied, trying to be comforting, trying to assure her that everything would be okay and she didn't have to worry about him... but even he wasn't very sure of that. After all, how much of this was actually real? What even was this, beyond just two wire frame dummies interacting...?

He bowed his head, ending up resting against the top of hers. He couldn't even do anything simple without questioning how real it was... damn this place.

"Are you going to take out all of your frustration on Amnon, even though it's not his fault? I thought you'd grown out of that, Luke?" Her voice was soft, but she meant every word. She might love him, but that didn't mean she wanted to be with him if he was going to stay the same jerk he was when they first met.

Luke let out a frustrated sigh at that, pulling away. His eyes met the screen again, where Amnon's message was still staring back out at him. We have fun memories, doesn't that count as real? But what was real in this place?

"I... I don't know," he grumbled, letting her go in favor of going back to the creepy bed, avoiding the actual mattress and flopping down on top of his trunk. "I just... I don't even know what's real. He's not real, our bodies aren't real... but what else isn't real? Is us talking real? How we act, how we think, is that all real? Or was that just something that was programmed in these stupid wire bodies we have?"

She listened to him carefully as he ranted. He seemed to need to get that all off of his chest and she didn't disagree with him. However...

"Luke, let me be perfectly honest with you. Everything I have done since I arrived here has been me. Nothing has made me react to seeing you any way than what I would. My thoughts are my own. My...feelings are my own." Her cheeks flame a bit as she speaks but she continues on. "I don't know a lot about fontech, but I know that even if it can manufacture replicas, it can't manufacture memories, feelings, thoughts. Those are you own. Mine are my own. Nothing about them are manufactured."

She sighed and moved into the room, going over to scratch the pink cheagle's ears. It might be a fake, but it was real enough for right then, and there was no point in being unnecessarily cruel to it.

"Do you...can you remember the way we all reacted to your harsh words to Fon Master Ion while we traversed Deo Pass?"

It was real, hunh... he supposed he should have believed it, given how Tear reacted to how she felt, but he still wasn't so sure. He wished he didn't have to feel that way...

"How could I forget?" he replied softly. "A year ago, it was the last thing I said to him."

She closed her eyes at his words. Really, it wasn't his best moment. In fact, she'd really thought she could hate him for the way he behaved, but then he did things like protecting Mieu and Ion from falling debris, made sure that everyone was actually okay while they traveled. As selfish and spoiled as Luke had been, there were good points to him too.

"He never held that against you, despite the fact that you were such a jerk to him. That wasn't...isn't Ion's way. He...he thought of you as a dear friend right up until he passed, Luke, because he saw the good that resided in you.

"That hasn't changed, you know. You're still the same boy that I accidentally kidnapped. Just...more mature."

Luke pinked a little at that, peering up at her almost shyly.

"More mature? Me?" he asked. "...you really think so?"

"You're not screaming about being the ambassador and I haven't heard you say unnecessarily cruel things to anyone since I arrived, so yes." She wanted to smile, but couldn't muster the energy to give him a full smile.

Tear turned away from Amnon to stare at Luke carefully. "I wouldn't have wished this place on anyone, least of all you or Ion."

Luke flinched at that; oh, yeah... that had been him when he first arrived at this place. That was embarrassing to be reminded of... he had really been pretty horrible.

"Tear..." he began, but he had no idea what else to say to that. After a moment, he let out a breath, giving her a soft smile. "...thanks."

Amnon bounced up onto the bed, sniffing at the two of them curiously, before letting out a faint cooing noise. Luke turned to him, hesitant, still not sure what to make of him... before he relaxed a little, reaching over to pet his head gently.

She returned his smile with one of her own. "You're welcome."

When Luke made the effort to console the poor cheagle, Tear felt something relax inside of her. "Are you going to be okay?"

Amnon let out a happy noise when it seemed like Luke wasn't going to push him away, going over to snuggle against his side. The redhead rolled his eyes, but let him, turning his attention back to Tear.

"Yeah... I think I get it now. I shouldn't take anything for granted. Not after all this," he replied... before he hesitated. Not take anything for granted, hunh... "Uh... T-Tear...?"

"I'm glad," she said softly, watching him with the cheagle. When he called her name hesitantly, she looked at him, a light blush on her cheeks. "Y-yes?"

Luke hesitated a moment, before letting out a determined noise, patting Amnon on the head as a warning before standing up. He stood before her a little awkwardly, not sure if he was going about this the right way or not. Heck, he had no idea what to even really do in situations like this; after all, his previous experiences were with Natalia, and that was extremely one sided. He cleared his throat, trying to force himself to relax.

"I... shouldn't take anything for granted, so I'm going to start with that right now," he began. "You're always there for me Tear, from the moment we woke up in Tataroo Valley, you've been looking out for me, and I've been nothing but a stubborn ass in return. I'm glad I got better even on our world, but... I still haven't really treated you like you deserve to be treated."

Her heart was racing behind the blank mask she wore. What was he trying to say? She understood some of it, of course. She wasn't stupid, by any means, but the suddenness of this sort of conversation was disorienting.

"You've treated me like a trusted comrade, like any other member of our party, Luke," she replied. "I...I can't ask for more than that."

Lie, but she didn't want to force her feelings on him. The last time she'd been with Luke, they had been so close to...something, but she knew that the truth about his health kept them both from pushing the subject.

"Well, no, not really," Luke corrected, reaching to rub at the back of his neck. "You're... more than that. And I... haven't really treated you like you are."

A few near misses, and knocking her down the stairs, and... damn, he's a mess. Hesitantly, he brought his hands down on her shoulders, pulling her close. If he was going to do this, he was going to do it right... and while this definitely wasn't the most romantic, it was better than what he'd normally do.

"I... I just... I... care about you, Tear... a lot. A-and I..."

Aw, crap; now was not the time to lose his nerve!

She looked up at him, trying to force herself to speak since he'd trailed off like that. She opened her mouth a few times, but no sound was coming out and her throat was so dry.

"I...care about you as well," she managed, cheeks as red as his while she allowed him to keep her close. Lorelei, this was just as hard for her as it was for him.

Luke looked a bit surprised by that; he honestly didn't think she'd reciprocate... never mind that there had been plenty of signs saying that she would. For a moment he could only stare, before a gentle smile worked it's way onto his face.

Well. Better now then never.

Without thinking about it, without worrying he'd get slapped for it, Luke dipped down slightly, pressing a soft proper kiss on her lips. There was no frantic scrambling and falling over this time; the only thing to distract them was a little pink cheagle, who was currently cooing with his ears waggling back and forth.

She froze as his lips covered hers, terrified that she was dreaming again. But, she'd never imagined that Amnon would be there, so perhaps it had to be true. Right?

Slowly, she raised her arms to go around his back and returned the kiss as best she could. Everything ceased to exist for her except the boy in her arms and her.

Lorelei, if she was dreaming, please don't let her wake up.

When Tear didn't move at first, he was almost certain he was going to get smacked. He almost cracked an eye open to check if he needed to run or not, when he felt her arms come up around him... and... she was kissing him back? Really?

Score!

He half grinned into the kiss, wrapping his arms around her and pulling her close against him.

She could feel his stupid grin, but she couldn't help but feel anything but happy as they continued to kiss. Finally, the need to breathe was overwhelming and she pulled back just a bit, but only to place her head on his shoulder.

The setting for this admission and step forward in their relationship was horrible. This tower was filled with souls that had been pulled from their homes and they'd learned that their bodies weren't even really real, not even as replicas like they had thought for a while now. However, despite the setting, she really couldn't have asked for more from him in regards to a confession. She only hoped he didn't feel differently in the morning.

Luke smiled faintly, burying his face in her hair. This felt... nice, it felt real, warm and sincere. A hand rubbed at her back as he closed his eyes with a soft sigh, feeling absolutely content.

...was something supposed to happen after this? Ah, whatever; he liked holding her. She was nice and soft, and the melons against his chest were nice and squishy.

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