[She doesn't see the sympathy because she still finds it difficult to look at him. If she was standing, she'd probably turn away, but since she's seated, that's much harder. She settles for keeping her eyes on the ground, even as she nods. It seems an insufficicent explanation, so,]

... They told me that if I didn't, I'd be locked away in a castle forever. I'd been alone for so long that I-- I couldn't bear it anymore. [But that's such a poor excuse, and she knows it.] I was selfish.