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towerofanimus2012-05-27 08:24 pm
viditlibertas) wrote in towerofanimus2012-05-27 08:24 pm
☆ World of Illusions
Characters: The Anguished One and open!
Setting: Floor Twelve- the space floor.
Format: Will match you~
Summary: AO hasn't explored the tower very far, and is suddenly regretting doing it alone.
Warnings: A star being very, very horrified and depressed and confused.
Alcor had adjusted to the tower relatively quickly, in truth. He had quickly begun to balance his budding emotions with his own curiosity, so as not to overwhelm himself- a tactic he had only learned through the Shining One's entrance in to his being. He was not perfect, however, and did not completely understand the depths of his own feelings. He had decided to explore the floors of the tower one at a time, and thus far had met little that could sway his feelings to any sort of horrible depths. Until, of course, he hovered in to floor 12. For the smallest moment, he had thought that somehow he was back where he belonged, amongst his fellow stars.
And then that flash of light came, and he watched with mounting horror and fear as life was wiped out.
Alcor hadn't realized he had moved at all until he felt the floor- there was one, after all -under his knees. He'd collapsed completely, it seemed, even if he seemed to realize deep in the back of his head that such was bizarre. That detached part of him was confused by the sudden irritation in his eyes, even if nothing came out. It was like his body was seeking to emulate humanity's behavior when in despair. In a way, that made him feel twice as distressed, and he managed to push himself shakily to standing. But even with his feet on the ground, arms hugging his elbows and knees pressed together...he didn't feel right.
Why was he behaving like this? Was it the influence of those he'd watched so closely...? Had the Shining One affected him so deeply? Or...had this all been within him all along, and he'd only just realized?
It didn't matter. What did was the sickening display taking place all around him, watching as life ended on repeat all across the universe. Yet, he couldn't bring himself to leave, or even move from his spot. He simply remained in the center of the room, quivering like a leaf in the breeze and watching.
Setting: Floor Twelve- the space floor.
Format: Will match you~
Summary: AO hasn't explored the tower very far, and is suddenly regretting doing it alone.
Warnings: A star being very, very horrified and depressed and confused.
Alcor had adjusted to the tower relatively quickly, in truth. He had quickly begun to balance his budding emotions with his own curiosity, so as not to overwhelm himself- a tactic he had only learned through the Shining One's entrance in to his being. He was not perfect, however, and did not completely understand the depths of his own feelings. He had decided to explore the floors of the tower one at a time, and thus far had met little that could sway his feelings to any sort of horrible depths. Until, of course, he hovered in to floor 12. For the smallest moment, he had thought that somehow he was back where he belonged, amongst his fellow stars.
And then that flash of light came, and he watched with mounting horror and fear as life was wiped out.
Alcor hadn't realized he had moved at all until he felt the floor- there was one, after all -under his knees. He'd collapsed completely, it seemed, even if he seemed to realize deep in the back of his head that such was bizarre. That detached part of him was confused by the sudden irritation in his eyes, even if nothing came out. It was like his body was seeking to emulate humanity's behavior when in despair. In a way, that made him feel twice as distressed, and he managed to push himself shakily to standing. But even with his feet on the ground, arms hugging his elbows and knees pressed together...he didn't feel right.
Why was he behaving like this? Was it the influence of those he'd watched so closely...? Had the Shining One affected him so deeply? Or...had this all been within him all along, and he'd only just realized?
It didn't matter. What did was the sickening display taking place all around him, watching as life ended on repeat all across the universe. Yet, he couldn't bring himself to leave, or even move from his spot. He simply remained in the center of the room, quivering like a leaf in the breeze and watching.
even if I wasn't alcor would still make it happen
It came out naturally, and he hadn't even had to think- the second he felt who was beside him, he didn't bother trying to mask or alter his behavior or emotions.
"For my brothers. For all of the stars."
He'd been so concerned for humanity and their will...that he hadn't even considered the implications this place held for the entire universe. Polaris no doubt was gone as well, taken under without even having a chance to forsee the event on the record...
"I...hadn't considered that everything was gone."
It was probably ridiculous to fret over those he had helped mankind destroy in the first place, but...his feelings were his own, and he finally knew that. He wouldn't reject them, even if they made it harder.
stars talk a surprising amount
"I..." He frowned, fidgeting with the flower from his breast pocket. It's not like he could really say everything was going to be OK; he knew better than that. "I'm sorry... I don't...."
well they dont usually have an audience, so
He couldn't expect humanity to cover for him all the time, especially those who he was supposed to be helping and putting his hope in to. It wouldn't be right, he couldn't use them like that.
"I just...I've never felt this strongly before. My anguish prior seems so small now."
you'd think they would with the vast openness of space
"...A lot of our problems seem insignificant in the past, especially when we have bigger things demanding our attention now..."
you'd think, but...also this is now the official hug icon
He felt pathetic and inexperienced, for the first time in a long while.
...
The best he could do was saunter unsteadily over to Jun, and once again initiate an awkward hug, this one more of a cling due to the teetery thing he was doing.
benny looks like a drifloon from that icon ngl
It was weird how huggy this guy seemed to be for a...god-like, thing. And Jun was surprised at first when Alcor seemed to be clinging, but once he got over that, he slowly returned the hug.
"I don't think it's naive... it's just... hopeful..." And keeping up hope in a situation like this was a pretty hard thing to do. Let's positive thinking, right?
hey hey that's mizar, benny's the tooth looking one- granted i shoulda shown you which was which
"Hopeful?"
Well, okay, he was guilty of that.
"I cannot bear to question my hope any longer. I spent so long unsure if it was well-founded, that to turn by back on it...would be to deny everything the Shining One taught me."
A sigh, or what was close to mimicking one. After that, he pulled away, hanging his head and looking pretty...defeated.
"I do not want people to see me like this. I am supposed to be supporting humanity...not the other way around. I cannot take the Heavenly Throne if I am unable to stand on my own."
ALL I KNOW IS DUBHE IS ICE CREAM
"I wanted to help humanity too, but I wanted to do it by myself. I didn't end up helping anybody. But my friends..." And even though he did not like remembering his Joker escapade, he smiled nevertheless. "My friends are amazingly willful. They're much stronger than I am. But they've had problems too-- we've all needed each others' support.
"You have the Shining One, don't you? It sounds like they've taught you a lot... Do you think you could make it to the Heavenly Throne without them?"
PEOPLE NEED TO STOP TRYING TO EAT ALCOR'S BBYBROTHER
A pause, and he found himself holding his elbows again.
"But I am no man. My will is not even close to what yours is capable of."
DAICHI THOUGHT HE LOOKED DELICIOUS
At this his smile was...much more somber and much more hollow. "We tried, and failed... A lot of people died because of me." And here his expression dissolved completely into a regretful frown. Recalling the event was...less than ideal. But so long as he didn't forget already, he wouldn't.
"In the end it turned out to be for nothing... Mankind has its faults too. What they will isn't necessarily good, and sometimes even combined..." His expression had grown considerably more dark at this point, but he shook his head. That wasn't the point, right now. "You believe in mankind more than mankind believes in itself sometimes. If you were able to evolve to this point beyond your brothers... I don't see why you couldn't develop a will like ours. You already look the part."
ROOD
He regarded Jun sadly, and shook his head. "Gods cannot die. They are not fair. Even if all of mankind, tomorrow, decided that they truly did want to die...it would be their choice. They choose. Gods do not. I room with Nyarlathotep here, I know him effortlessly. He acts on that which he knows, and nothing more. Free will, the power of choice- that power is beyond anything that any god can hope for- and even if fractured, it is where my heart belongs."
Metaphorically, since you know, he lacks organs. But the mention of his form made him almost look...awkward? And lace his fingers together, once removed from his elbows. "This form is a byproduct of the Shining One. It is not exact, but in many ways I sought to emulate him. My real appearance is..." A w k w a r d.
IT'D BEEN AWHILE SINCE HE LAST ATE
He was already unsettled but the mention of Nyarlathotep got look of surprise-- and a much more violent reaction from Chronos, who grew immediately hostile and angry at the mention of the Crawling Chaos. Especially being in such close vicinity to someone the knew. "..Nyarlathotep is just another side of humanity, isn't he? Who's to say he doesn't plan and chose..."
Jun was looking down now, but he didn't take notice of Alcor's sudden awkwardness. Even despite his downcast tone, he continued as if nothing was wrong. "You can see both sides though; you know the state of the Gods and the will of humanity..." And he looked up just a bit, "Wouldn't that make you something close to human?"
no subject
If Alcor knew how to spit, he would have, so luckily THAT was not a thing that was happening.
The second he was mentioned akin to humanity, his face changed completely- his eyes narrowed, and he covered his nose as well as his mouth. That was...wrong. To think on. He was Alcor, and he was a star, a Septentrione; he could never change that.
"No. I...my change, I cannot explain. I have accepted my will has become free after watching over humans for so long, but..." He shook his head. "I suppose it may be an imitation."
no subject
He didn't comment further on Nyarlathotep, and kept his gave down as he continued speaking, even if the subject wasn't as unsettling. To him, at least. "Imitation or no, a will is a will, isn't it? Can you truly just imitate free will?"
no subject
Also Hito-shura, but if we start listing him, then we have to list all the P2 bitties and that would just lose the impact and he's sort of having a moment.
"When I first awoke...the first time I came in to being. I had been dreaming." If anything, Alcor just looked nervous as he spoke, like somehow this would come back to bite him in the ass. "I don't know how. It's not possible, and it set me apart from the other Septentriones. This is why I...came to watch over humanity." The 'fled' connotation carefully redacted.
"Polaris has long felt my betrayal was an anomalie, but within the confines of the Record; just another way to test humanity. I...feel he is wrong about that. However, I don't know why, or how. I feel..." A very delicate pause; "I feel at all. I feel for the situation, and my brothers do not." The star took to curling and uncurling his hands for a minute, as if to test their validity.
"I've told nobody this before. I didn't know how to address it. I am happy I can see the beauty of mankind...but I am sad the other Septentriones cannot. If a dream is all that set us apart, then..."
A beat. "I don't think I could handle it."
no subject
He didn't claim to understand anything about how Stars work-- it wasn't that long ago that he had just learned that it was possibly for Stars to be sentient. But he did his best to at least listen.
"Dreams are more important than you think," He said, with a surprising firmness. "Dreams are what inspire people-- they spur changes and action, and even though they can bring despair... they also bring insurmountable happiness."
He gave a cautious smile. "Being able to dream is an amazing feat on its own. I... don't know if your brothers can, but... if you were able to, maybe one day they will too. If that's your dream."