Idiots abound

[mustlovedogs]

Characters: Leon tsunball and Mondo mustlovedogs
Setting: The cafeteria
Summary: A strategy meeting between idiots. And also everything awkward.
Warnings: Leon and Mondo.

[With apparently no food, clearly everyone should step aside and let the real men handle things. ...Ie. just go looking around the cafeteria for nonexistent food. There has to be some somewhere in there, right? There's no way they would be left without anything. Not only that, but with Monobear planning things, they're definitely in trouble.]

Hey, Kuwata, you find anything?

Comments

[tsunball]

Nope, nothing. There's nothing at all..!

[ And with a sigh (because this is clearly the biggest effort ever, much more effort than Leon's used to, either way) he decides to flop down on a chair there to sit and watch the cafeteria from there. There's the urge to just drop his head on the table, but no, okay, he'll look like he's still putting some effort into this for a bit more.. ]

Shit..! They can't just do this, right?! They can't just take a tower, dump people into it, and then suddenly decide to turn off the power and food supply! That just isn't right!

[mustlovedogs]

Sure makes that letter about saving us sound like a total fucking joke. If that's what they wanted they'd make sure we didn't starve!!

[If only they could find even some bread, he's got that weird butter in his trunk! :D]

[tsunball]

[ KGJHJDFJKG SHIT, NO, NOT THE BUTTER.. THEY WOULDN'T REALISE..!!

And in a way Leon does think they're saved, after all.. if Mondo got executed after him, then both of them were 'saved' by this tower in the sense that they got another chance at life. But if it's just going to kill them again. ... Uuuuu, he doesn't want to dieee... ]

So on one side there's this place trying to starve us.. and on the other side there's that bear.. This whole situation just seems like the worst no matter how you look at it!

[mustlovedogs]

Aa, that's right, you going on that field trip?

[Sounds like any old classmate conversation now...]

[tsunball]

[ To anyone not in the loop it really does.. ]

... Not like there's much of a choice, right? If we don't know, who knows what worse that thing might do-- [ ah, with that he realises he never.. told Mondo, huh.. his face is noticably a little more pale when he recalls and talks about it though. ] Y'know, Oowada, he's.. he's rebuilding that fucking machine..!

[mustlovedogs]

Shit...! With the baseballs? That fucking thing?!

[This is very upsetting - what if he goes for Mondo next?! Motorcycle death cage?!?!?!?!?]

There's no way he can make one of those here...!! That bastard can't do what he likes anymore!!

[tsunball]

I saw him working on it with my own eyes when I first arrived here, okay..?! There's no way in hell I'd ever mistake that thing anymore! [ They're getting worked up already.. ]

Ah, why does he have to pick on me again?! That's unfair, totally unfair..!

[mustlovedogs]

He can't get to you!! There's too many people around here, right?! What about the chains, he hasn't got that, right?! He can't drag you off!!

[haha yes he does]

Aaaah, fuck, Kuwata!! He's gonna kill us!!

[tsunball]

U-.. us?! The last time I checked, I'm the baseball player here, not you..!

[ you know Leon is completely caught up in being worked up and terrified when he'll mention baseball like it's no big deal.. ]

[mustlovedogs]

Yeah, but if he's making the fucking baseball canon, he's gonna make that fucked up motorcycle cage too!! You know there's no way he'd only kill one kid, he's gotta go after all of us!

[tsunball]

[ In the middle of everything Leon actually does catch on to the fact that ah, so that's what he killed Mondo with-- but it's not like he's just going to casually discuss that, especially not in the middle of this. ]

But he didn't do anything yet, right?! If he was just going to kill us off that easily, he would've already done it.. he would have for sure!! [ or he's just trying to talk some dumbass confidence into himself. ] He wouldn't have gone through the trouble of making that whole weirdass school trip plan!

[mustlovedogs]

He's just gonna torture us...! He'll kill us later but right now it's just torture! Just like before, the bastard's a psycho!

Hey, he said there was some kind of announcement, he's not gonna tell us to kill somebody again, there's no way, right...?!

[tsunball]

[ nooo, why does everything Mondo says have to make sense to a fellow idiot, he's full-on despairing here.. ]

I don't want to die..! A-and I don't want to get tortured either, shit! But there's no way he can tell us to kill someone, he doesn't even have anything to offer in return this time, right?! He doesn't know the way out of this tower, there's no way in hell..!

[mustlovedogs]

[He suddenly grabs Leon's shoulders]

You gotta calm down, Kuwata!! We've gotta think...!

[He seems pretty bent on thinking for about a minute, gritting his teeth as he grips Leon's shoulders and says nothing.

Until the inability to think pisses him off and he lets go of Leon only to pick up a chair and throw it.]

Aaah, fuck!! Shit!! We're fucking doomed!

[tsunball]

[ The moment Mondo grabs him like that he tenses up.. he knows Mondo's strength, after all, so for a moment there's a mental prayer of pleasedon'thurtmepleasedon'thurtmepleasedon'thurtme until he finally lets go after that agonizing minute and he lets out a sigh of relief.

(Still, he isn't planning on switching places with that chair anytime soon..) ]

A-.. at least you're lucky, Oowada! Even if we're doomed and we'll die, you'll have had your girlfriend here..! [ priorities. ]

[mustlovedogs]

[Wait what? Does he have a girlfriend he's not aware of, that would be pretty sweet-- but no it doesn't work like that, does it...

The confusion does do a good job of calming him down (for the moment) at least.]

Huh? You got me mixed up with somebody else.

[tsunball]

[ .. oh, hey, he even got him to calm down?! Yes, Leon knows about the soothing magic that the topic of women brings, he totally knows..

But then again, it's sort of weird to see Mondo being so confused over it. Just for a moment, because then he recalls Chihiro acting the same way, clearly even he's doing a good job of keeping up the whole keeping the relationship a secret thing!! But Leon's already seen through it in his mind, so he just grins. (Moodswings like a girl's.) ]

No way, man! C'mon, you don't have to keep it a secret for me, you can just admit it! Don't want me putting the moves on her instead, right? [ Not that he would since Chihiro isn't his type, but it's a joke judging from the way he laughs.. ]

[mustlovedogs]

The fuck are you talking about? Who's saying she's my girlfriend?

[Why would anyone even WANT to say that...]

[tsunball]

... [ .. okay, bro, this isn't cool?! bros don't keep secrets from each other about girls?! but fine, fine, he'll go along with it.. ]

Fujisaki, of course! Who else could it be? [ or rather, Leon's brains think 'she' is his girlfriend rather than Chihiro saying it, but he's neglecting to tell about that part.. ]

[mustlovedogs]

...Fuji...Fujisaki said that?

[But it's impossible for him to be anybody's girlfriend...... He knows Leon doesn't know about that yet, but still, Chihiro wouldn't say something so obviously false, right??]

[tsunball]

Seriously, you're still acting as if you have no clue about it?

[ or you could just be wrong, Leon?? but nope, the thought doesn't even cross his mind. ]

[mustlovedogs]

Why the hell would I have any clue about it?! That kid's not...

[But, he gave his word to Chihiro that he wouldn't tell his secret, and trying to explain anything much would involve giving it away, so he just shuts his mouth.]

[tsunball]

[ Because shutting up in the middle of that sentence isn't suspicious at all.. Luckily (??) Leon is an idiot as always. ]

Fine, fine, I get it, pretend it's a secret even in front of me. [ that hurts, bro!! ] Not like I'd judge you for being into chicks like that, y'know, it means there's all the more choice from the chicks with dynamite bodies for me!

[mustlovedogs]

I'm telling you it ain't like that...!! Just ask Fujisaki! ['Even if he was a girl';] That kid'd never go out with me after--

[Shit he can't say anything. Can't break the man's promise, doesn't want to say he killed the chipmunk...]

[tsunball]

[ too bad, because after that it's difficult for Leon to not at least catch on to the whole murder deal.. because you can practically see the cogs turning in Leon's head, and slowly but surely his expression gets more and more shocked to a point where it's near-comical. ]

Oowada, don't tell me.. the person you killed was Fujisaki?! [ the strongest guy in the group kills the girl who seems half hamster, ah.. ]