[OPEN] The King and his men stole the Queen from her bed...

[andajarofdirt]

 Characters: Captain Jack Sparrow (& Jack) & YOU!
Setting: Room 2-18, the dormitory hallway
Format: Action, but I'll match you.
Summary: There's now a Jack Sparrow in the Tower. Captain Jack Sparrow. There's also a Jack. Just Jack. One of them is a smelly, tricky bastard and the other one is wearing the white bodysuit abomination. You know, fun times.
Warnings: Undead monkey shenanigans. Lots of "bugger!".  Also, Jack Sparrow parading around in the starting white bodysuit. Enjoy.

[So there's Jack, dear roommates, dreads falling all over his face, weighted down by all that crap he's braided into his hair over the years. And wearing the bodysuit. You know the one. White, skin-tight, impossibly shiny. Yeah. So there's Jack, wincing a little as he squeaks - he's trying to move, you see, but the suit squeaks any time he moves - his way to his trunk.

He's read his letters, you see. But Jackie deary is a pirate. There are trunks here. Why shouldn't he take a look. Why shouldn't he start with the one at the foot of his own bed.

Oh, right.

Because the moment he opens the trunk, there's a bloody screeching monkey coming out of it, that's why.]

Oh, not you!


[Poor, poor Jack, scrambling around the room, trying to get a hold of the squirmy, undead pest. Poor, poor you, roommate dear, having to come in and find a grown man  - in dreads - yowling after the monkey. While wearing the squeaky, shiny, white, skin-tight bodysuit.

Joy.]









[Sometime later - a long time later -  Jack finds himself strolling down the dormitory hallways, moving with that perpetual sway of his and finally dressed in proper clothes. That is, his own. Where is Jack the monkey? He doesn't know. He doesn't care to find out.  He's much more interested in having a look around.

This is certainly nothing quite like... there.

Nothing quite like anywhere he's ever been, matter of fact, in life or death or in between. And then, he finds a network terminal. Should you wander around, you will find him studying the thing and gesticulating at it, making faces and waving his hands around.

You know, being Jack Sparrow.]
 

Comments

[andajarofdirt]

"Mate, the only thing best done in a state of sobriety is dying. And not even always."

[keeps_count]

"Then you had best cease consuming alcohol soon. Death is a common event here and few can escape it forever, only to be returned to life within a day."

Suddenly doubting the sanity of the pirate man but he'll give him the benefit of the doubt. Arriving here could be disorienting.

"Perhaps we should start again. I am Legolas, of the Mirkwood Elves."

[andajarofdirt]

"I'm sure that sounded really convincin' in yer head, but it really isn't."

The introduction, however, gives Jack pause. Pause that translates into a squint. And he drops a bit of the act for just a second because, c'mon:

"Come off it, now, Will. The wig was already pushin' it, but that name?"

[keeps_count]

"Isn't it? I should daresay it doesn't sound possible but it does happen."

Raising his eyebrows again and shaking his head, just a bit confused. A wig? And what could possible be wrong with his name? Legolas was quite fond of the name his father had given him.

"I beg your pardon but who is Will? And what is a wig?"

[andajarofdirt]

"The thing I'm going to rip off yer head, mate, if you don't stop it."

Jack frowns, squinting some more as he starts circling Legolas now.

"I mean, Will, my friend, I know the missus can be a bit scary. She's got this dubious honor of having murdered me and all, but don't you think the cheap wig and the French name is pushin' it a little?"

[keeps_count]

"I would prefer you not even consider touching my hair. It's quite well attached and I prefer not to be touched but by those I consider friends." Or children, because this elf has a soft spot for children, if the competition had been any indication.

The elf crossed his arms as Jack circled him, shifting his shoulders so his bow sat more comfortably in that position.

"I'm afraid I haven't a clue what you're talking about. I am not Will, I know not what French is and I have no 'missus' to speak of."

[andajarofdirt]

"Your French accent is deplorable too."

Oh, I'm sorry, do you think you're having a conversation with him? No, silly boy. He's talking at you, not to you, by this point. Jack continues to circle him, playing with the braids in his chin.

"Though admittedly, Lizzie might forgive you for this stunt if you tell her you're just actin' the part of the queen. Her bein' the King and all."

[keeps_count]

"I'm not attempting to speak in any accent. I simply speak as I always have." He had nearly forgotten just how stubborn some members of the race of Man could be.

At this point, Legolas sighs very softly but not out of irritation. He turns towards Jack, a silent way of asking him to cease his circling, as though he were a hunter and Legolas the prey.

"I would ask no forgiveness from a woman I have never met and whom I have caused no personal insult."

[andajarofdirt]

Jack gives Legolas the "really? Are we really gonna do this?" look, before sighing.

"...fine, fine." He rolls his eyes. "Let us pretend, for a moment, that in my magnanimous mood, I'm willing to believe you are not, in fact, William Turner, also known as Will, eunuch and captain of the Flying Dutchman. Furthermore! We shall believe for now that I am somewhat willing to accept that you are not, in fact, using a fake name and an ugly wig to run away from the only creature I know to be terrifying enough to scare off an immortal: your beloved, lady wife, Elizabeth Turner, Pirate King and slayer of moi." He pointed a finger straight into Legolas face. "And instead, let us assume for a moment that I'm not depressingly sober right now and in fact I've drunk rum to my heart's content and I'm therefore passed out somewhere on Tortuga, and I also accept your story about being named Legolas, of Mirkwood, south France going by the accent, and your pointy ears are not, matter of fact, the result of reckless misuse of a knife but actual elvish ears."

He takes a deep breath - sorry for the stench - and then swings his arms around, swaying like he is drunken off his ass, despite his claims.

"Let us pretend all that!" He pauses. Makes a face. "I seem to have lost the point I was trying to make."

[keeps_count]

Legolas tried to follow along with everything Jack said but a large portion of it made little or no sense at all. Part of him was insulted that his hair was called ugly (though at least it was soft and clean), confused at the comment about France and, really, that breath of his could have slain an army of orcs.

"I'm not sure that there ever was a point, to be quite honest. I know nothing of the world you hail from, so I'm not even certain what France is but there is no such place in Ennor. And I am not wed, especially not to someone named Elizabeth."

[andajarofdirt]

"Oh, right, Lizzie."

Jack looks wry for a moment, before he shrugs. He points a finger at Legolas.

"The point, lad, is that yer dead man walkin'. I mean, I know you are, I made you that, but what I mean is that you're a deader man walkin'. Ain't savin' you from this one this time."

[keeps_count]

"I am hardly dead, I am one of the Children of Iluvatar and one of the most skilled warriors in Mirkwood. I need no help from you when you can't even differentiate me from another."

The prince simply pinches the bridge of his nose, regaining his composure. He was better than becoming short for someone like this.

[andajarofdirt]

"Sure, sure, but hell hath no wrath like the Pirate King scorned, mate. Take it from me, I'd know."

He shakes his head.

[keeps_count]

"And I've nothing to fear from a woman I've not met in my life. And despite the many years I've to recall, I would not forget a woman I was supposedly betrothed to."

If Legolas we ever to marry someone, she'd have to meet the expectations of Thranduil. And possibly Gimli.