[open]

[kickspenguins]

Characters: Sakuma and open!
Setting: aquarium; backdated to the day after the ghoul powder incident.
Format: starting with action but any
Summary: being forced to kill you best friend is hard on anyone and Sakuma's dealing with it the only way he knows how; by hiding away from people.
Warnings: none really unless moping counts

[Sakuma's sitting on the ground leaning against the wall. If anyone runs into him here, he definitely presents an odd sight. He has his eyes closed and just looking at his condition, he has no business being out of bed.

He's been here ever since he woke up and found himself alone in his room. At first his memory is hazy and he doesn't know why his left wrist is in a cast or why his body aches. When he reaches up to touch at his neck gingerly, mindful of the pain the tells him it's bruised, he remembers his fight with Kidou down in the cafeteria.

Since it doesn't seem like his friend is back yet and not wanting to be in the room alone any longer, he escapes to the aquarium. The trip there is slow and painful but he presses on. When he finally reaches the aquarium he lets out a heavy sigh. Somehow since coming to the tower, this place has become his sanctuary and being surrounded by the glassless tanks of water is calming for some reason he doesn't understand. Not to mention the fact that here, he can be alone if he wants to.

Comments

[pengeen]

[Hesitantly, he lifts his head and looks over to his friend.]

Sakuma...

[kickspenguins]

I can't really compare at all. You're really great.

[All this is said really softly, as if he can't really believe he's admitting it. It's something he's always felt since following Kidou only now he thinks he can accept their differences and he doesn't resent Kidou for it. It doesn't mean he doesn't wish he's stronger though. On the contrary it makes him want to work harder.]

You can never fail to me.

[pengeen]

That's not true, Sakuma. [Saying things like that only make him upset... he's tired of people saying he's so much better then them, because he really thinks he's not.]

I'm no better then you, or Genda, or anyone else. I'm not perfect, or amazing, or any of those things...

[kickspenguins]

[While what Kidou says isn't unexpected, it makes Sakuma realize how much he changed. This boy beside him now is completely different than the arrogant one he first met. But despite that, it doesn't change his opinions for Kidou.]

You might not think so but you changed my life, so I do think you are those things.

[pegeen]

[Though he still disagrees, what Sakuma says gets him to smile a little bit.]

...I didn't think I had made much of an impact on anyone.

[kickspenguins]

You did to me.

[That's why he's willing to devote himself to Kidou so much because without the other boy, he doesn't know where he'd be. One thing is for sure though, he wouldn't be able to enjoy soccer as much and that's important too.]

[pegeen]

[He hugs his knees to his chest a little more and rests his chin on top of them.]

I had no idea... [He's not really sure how to properly react to someone telling them he completely changed their life, to be honest... it's probably obvious how awkward this conversation was making him....

But he's still smiling, so this conversation is going in an ok direction.]

Thank you for telling me, Sakuma. It makes me.... happy, to hear that I've been able to change someone's life for the better... [oh god how does he feelings]

[kickspenguins]

I actually don't know what made me admit that to you, to be honest but I'm glad it makes you happy.

[Because as long as his friends are happy, that's all that matters to him. Even if being here makes him completely miserable, that fact makes it just a bit more bearable.

He's smiling back, albeit a little sheepishly. He doesn't really know how to deal with feelings either, especially his own and this entire conversation is pretty much something he'd never do normally.]

[pegeen]

Well I'm glad you were able to admit it to me. [Because admitting things like that is hard, at least for him.]

[kickspenguins]

[He doesn't mind this, actually. Sitting here in the aquarium chatting with Kidou. It almost makes him forget they're trapped in a tower that's bent of making them suffer. Even if he still feels terrible for not meeting the standards he thinks he should be at, it's still nice, in a way.

Almost like the calm before a storm.]

We've known each other for a long time so I guess it's about time I told you anyway.