003: Coldstuck

[wweh]

Characters: Eridan Ampora & YOU
Setting: Dorm Room 3-06, Dorm Halls, Media Room
Format: action brackets
Summary: Eridan's got a case of the eventfluenza, and trying to fight it how he can. by doing nothing and complaining about it.
Warnings: language.

DORM ROOM-
[Eridan's been having a rougher time sleeping than usual. Waking up at random times during the day, either due to fits of coughing or gasping for air. Occasionally he'll make some sort of weird noise coming out of his gills, trying to remove whatever he feels is stuck in there. The door's been open, so you may walk by to see him huddled up in his blanket, cape, and scarf. He's been stealing the blankets from his roommates whenever they're not in the room, and is constantly shifting to try and get comfortable.]

DORM HALLS-

[You might want to nudge Eridan back to his room. He probably isn't going to listen, but... never hurts to try. He looks pretty terrible. Eyes are dark and sunken in, he's hunched over, completely covered in his cape. He really doesn't look like he wants to be bothered, which is the exact reason why you should]

MEDIA ROOM-

[Eridan's plopped down in front of a TV, playing some really crappy RPG knockoff. It's not FLARP, but he's too sick for that he'd get killed in an instant and he knows it. But he's having a bad time, in fact, the worst time. He's really stuck on a boss and complaining quite loudly at that. He's got a stuffy head and his accent sounds funnier than usual. ]

OH, HE JUST KEEPS USIN' THE SAME BROKEN FUCKIN' SPELL. WHAT A BUNCH A' GARBAGE. WHY DO PEOPLE EVEN THINK THIS SHIT'S FUCKIN' "FUN?"

Comments

TWO PARALLEL UNIVERSE BROS PLAY WHATEVER

[wweh]

[and Eridan grumbles at Jadeeri's comments some more.]

I meant to do that. Totally fuckin' intentional I've already picked up on some nuances.

That's the premise of the best worst sitcom in the history of paradox space.

[chronomancer]

Given that I know jackshit about this, I'm going to take your word for it.

[He's just gonna sit in this corner, hoarding warmth and watching Eridan play.]

But if you feel like sharing those nuances, I won't complain.

[wweh]

When you die in this you keep all the items and money you got. It's a valid tactic to send your guys straight into the fuckin' abyss over an' over again while they kill everythin' they can for some easy money.

This is the first time I've even played somethin' like this.

[and he resumes playing, only to throw the controller down shortly after.]

Did you just see that fuckin' bullshit? I hit the boss with everythin' I got and he still survived with one health! Do you know how many times I've been dyin' on this stage just to take him down?

[chronomancer]

[...whoa, Eridan, watch it with the gaming rage. Eridan scoots a little further into the couch, just in case the other starts flailing.]

...maybe there's like a trick or a specific thing you need to do?

[Yeah, you're not getting very good insight from this one. He's a bit of a derp when it comes to games.]

Though if you do it enough times you'll probably memorize it. So why don't you try doing something different each time?

[That is not him projecting his Time powers into a game at all. Of course not.]

[wweh]

[Eridan shrugs.]

Yeah, at this point I'm wonderin' if I'm even supposed to be runnin' after him. Probably wiser to just beat the level an' move on. You don't have to kill him apparently....

....but it's braggin' rights. An' probably extra stuff.

[chronomancer]

[Excuse him while his mind boggles a little. He blinks.]

...why is there a battle there if you're not required to fight it?

[What is videogame logic.]

[wweh]

Like I said, braggin' rights.

I'm all about feelin' superior in any way possible.

[chronomancer]

That much is obvious, yea.

[He's seriously contemplating throwing a cushion at your head, Eridan.]

So wait, there's like entire parts of the game that are just optional?

[This is going to be like trying to explain WoW to a Bejeweled player.]

[wweh]

Even in FLARPin' there's always the safe route an' the fuckin' bullshit route. The latter is totally optional most a' the time, but always seems to have the better loot.

[chronomancer]

Oh. So, it's a difficulty level thing?

[He's trying to understand, but you're gonna have to use small words here, bro.]

[wweh]

A' course it is. I always go for hard mode. Only way to keep competitive when FLARPIN'

[Would explain a LOT about you, Eridan]

[chronomancer]

...huh. I always thought FLARP looked a little boring, to be honest.

[Shrug.]