towerofanimus | Getting to Be Too Much

Entry tags:

Getting to Be Too Much

Characters: Pokey Minch [AU] and you!
Setting: Floor 2 and Floor 14
Format: Prose starting, but I'll match you
Summary: The voices he's been hearing are starting to get to Pokey, and he's desperate to find a solution to it.
Warnings: Possible violent imagery due to auditory hallucinations.

Floor 2 - The Infirmary
[It just won't end.

The initial begging for help Pokey could do. It had been so faint and far away that his callousness was still more than sufficient to ignore it. To be annoyed by it more than bothered or disturbed. But over the days it grew. And grew. And grew. Until he could hear the voices plain and clear.

And hear everything they were going through.

He'd tried to ignore it another few days or so, but this didn't work as well. When he could recognize the voices, tell who they were - he could no longer ignore it. And for more than once he'd wished he'd never come to understand others or learn empathy. The voices weren't real, they couldn't be. Just like in Mayfield it had to be a kind of trick. Pokey just needed to find a way to beat it.

So if you're stopping by the infirmary today you'll find a 13 year old boy sticking whatever cotton balls and cotton swabs he can find in his ears. He knows the voices aren't coming from outside but maybe if he can trick himself into thinking he can't hear them he won't. This may damage the hell out of his ears too but hey. That's the price he'll happily pay if this works and someone can stop him.]

Floor 14 - Media Room
[If he just gets his mind off it, it won't bother him.

Pokey is sitting down on a beanbag chair, mindlessly playing one of the video games in front of him. It appears to be a platformer of some kind, though he doesn't care. He's at that point where he's paying so much attention to the game he isn't playing it at all. It's all just response at the actions going on in the game, and even though he seems to be doing alright his mind still isn't on the game at all.

It's on nothing at all.

He can't hear the voices begging with him, pleading with him for help. He's too busy playing a game. One of them is crying for help, asking over and over again why it's happening, their screams only barely louder than the sound of a sledgehammer falling again. And again. And again.

Pokey's too busy playing.

One of them belittles him, asking why he isn't doing anything. If he never cared in the first place and each statement feels like it's just as cutting as the whip Pokey can hear alongside it.

He's playing the game. He's in the zone with this. Nothing else matters.

One of them is just screaming in grief and pain and unable to comprehend why this is happening. No understanding of why they could be in pain, just that they are, and a belief that crying out to Pokey will make things better. So they cry in a wet, sobbing voice while something hot and wet sizzles and burns flesh in the back ground.

The game controller goes flying at the TV screen. Pokey isn't in the game anymore.]

Shut up! Shuuuuut uuuuup! You aren't even real!

[Pokey's tearing the controller out of the game system, twirling it over his head by the cord like a lasso before flinging it across the room in a rage.]

You aren't real and even if you were I couldn't do anything!

[He tries to tear the game console away from the TV, and when that fails he resorts to kicking at it. Again and again and again.]

Even if you were I couldn't do anything!

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[chaos smiled and nodded.]

Don't worry. I understand what you mean. As for why I help people without expecting anything in return, there are two reasons. The first is that I do not need anything in return. Money, food, water..I do not need people to pay me those things, and thus, I do not ask or require them.

The second reason is because I enjoy it. I love humanity. I do not wish to see a member of it suffer needlessly. If I can help, even just a little bit, then that is reward enough.

Yeah, but there's got to be people you love more than others. No one just loves everyone. That's stupid.

[At that, chaos sighed, and if Pokey is perceptive, he will notice a melancholy look on chaos's face.]

..I admit, some people are pretty hard to like..but there's usually one aspect about a person that makes them likeable..or understandable. Perhaps it sounds foolish, but that is how I have been living..so maybe it has worked on some level.

[Of course, chaos did have a woman he loved, but..she was dead, and the closest thing he had to her now was an android that held her soul and sometimes awakened knowing that. However, most of the time, that soul lay dormant.]

[Pokey is quiet for a moment. And he wonders, and wants to ask, what chaos might do if there was a person who had nothing likeable about them. About a person who was fully worthless and cruel.

But instead he says.]

They're screaming.

[And chaos will put a hand on Pokey's shoulder, trying to calm him down and offer him some comfort. He may move away from it again, but chaos just can't hear that and not offer some physical comfort.]

I am sorry to hear that. What are they screaming about? Are they in pain or asking you to help them?

[Pokey squirms a bit, still not liking being touched by someone he doesn't know. But he'll deal with it for the moment.

He just keeps looking at the ground. Frowning.]

...All of the above.

I just want it to stop.

[In his head, chaos sighed and thought. Warming a person was much different than cutting out noises. He might have been able to do it at full power..but here, it was probably very dangerous. Plus, the boy might get suspicious of what he was, if he wasn't already.

So, he tried to treat this like he was hearing The Song of Nephilim.]

Then, instead of closing out your ears, close your mind to them. Do not listen to them.

You think I haven't tried that?

....It's not that simple. I just...

I have to. Sometimes.

[chaos sighed.]

I know..believe me, I know how hard it is. Just..keep fighting. Please, do not give up. If you do, it is all over.

[That melancholy expression? It's growing.]

...I'm not gonna give up. Jeez. Calm down.

I just said it's annoying, alright?

I'm still gonna try. I owe it to some people not to run away from it.

[chaos nodded at that and gave a small smile.]

Well, that is good to hear. If you try your hardest, you will succeed. You will not make your friends suffer or worry.

.....

What about when your hardest isn't good enough?

[chaos sighed, but didn't lose his smile.]

That is when you need to remember an important rule in life: There are exceptions to almost everything. Thus, there will be times when doing your best will not be enough. However, when those times pop up, you should recognize why you couldn't stop it, improve, and keep going. Learn from your mistakes and missteps, improve, and fight on.

..Again, am I making any sense?

...Not really.

The best you are now is the best you're ever going to be. Sometimes you just can't be better than that.

[And there goes chaos's smile.]

..Now, I know that to be untrue. No matter who you are, human or not, you can always improve. What you start out as isn't who you always remain. You can improve or become worse. But people can choose whether they want to improve or not. They can think things through, see their mistakes, and keep going.

[chaos, sadly, was an example of someone becoming a little bit worse. In the past, he had enough power to warm up this whole Tower and not think about it too much. Now, it's just one person at a time, and done very carefully so that they don't spontaneously combust.]

Yeah but there's a wall. You can't just keep improving and improving and improving. Eventually you're going to run out of how far you can go.

Perhaps. However, you cannot see where that wall is or when you will reach it, so people can hope that they can continue to improve, even when they reach that wall and do not know it. And, perhaps, some may jump over that wall and continue running.

...I'm not that good a jumper.

[Pokey shrugs a little bit at it, helpless.]

I'm Mayfield. Who're you?

Well, since you have realized that, you can improve upon your skills, or find some other way to smash down walls. I find hammers to be a good start.

[chaos smiled and nodded.]

It is nice to meet you, Mayfield. My name is..chaos.

You're a real optimist, aren't you?

[chaos. Huh. Well. He's heard weirder names.]

What'd you do to get a name like that?

Perhaps. I simply have hope in humanity..and I have seen people do what I have described many times. If they could do it, then so can you.

[In his head, chaos sighed and thought about how he could dodge this bullet.]

..I was born. When one is born, they are given a name, are they not?

Yeah but it's usually. You know. A name.

And what makes chaos any less of a name than Mayfield, Peter, or Molly?

[Pokey thinks on that. And thinks. And thinks. And because he can come to no better explanation, he just gives a shrug.]

It just is.

[At that, chaos lightly chuckled.]

I see. That is an interesting view on the matter. However, I do not see how it does make it any less of a name. But I am happy to agree to disagree with you on the matter.

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ceasetoexist - 2012-12-27 07:42 (UTC) - Expand

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