I can't remember how much I've told you about my father. Ever since the experiment, some parts of my memory are not as they should be.
[Silently, he curses the administrators for this. After willing himself to forget things during the experiment, now that things are actually gone he is not happy. So far the lapses seem to focus on the time of the experiment itself, but who is to say they will stay that way?]
He was a god of love and poetry, but the important part of that in this situation is the love. He would always tell me that the best way to love yourself was to love others because that improved the world around you not only for you but for everyone. It was a cycle of improvement.
In addition to that, I knew from an early age that I would be going to serve my lord. Learning to best serve him was the focus of my whole life. I suppose those two things alone would be enough to shape me into what I am, but there was one more thing.
[He closes his eyes for a moment and takes a deep breath.]
My curse. I always wanted to help people. It was what father taught me. It was my duty as a knight. The last thing I wanted to do was hurt them and that is just what the curse did. And it wasn't just the women I hurt. It was everyone who was upset by them being hurt. And then there was this one...
I-I tried to be gentle, I really did, but I had to make her understand. When she said she did, I thought everything was going to be okay. Then--
[His voice trembles and he stops to take another deep breath to calm it.]
She found me one day a few weeks later. I was out with Oscar taking care of some business and she...she killed herself in front of me.
[Diarmuid's eyes fly open, their corners moistened by tears. It's a sure sign of not only how tired he is that he can't control his emotions better, but how much this one incident has shaped him.]
How can I want anything for myself when I regularly take so much from others? How can that be right?
Ack! TL;DR sorry!
[Silently, he curses the administrators for this. After willing himself to forget things during the experiment, now that things are actually gone he is not happy. So far the lapses seem to focus on the time of the experiment itself, but who is to say they will stay that way?]
He was a god of love and poetry, but the important part of that in this situation is the love. He would always tell me that the best way to love yourself was to love others because that improved the world around you not only for you but for everyone. It was a cycle of improvement.
In addition to that, I knew from an early age that I would be going to serve my lord. Learning to best serve him was the focus of my whole life. I suppose those two things alone would be enough to shape me into what I am, but there was one more thing.
[He closes his eyes for a moment and takes a deep breath.]
My curse. I always wanted to help people. It was what father taught me. It was my duty as a knight. The last thing I wanted to do was hurt them and that is just what the curse did. And it wasn't just the women I hurt. It was everyone who was upset by them being hurt. And then there was this one...
I-I tried to be gentle, I really did, but I had to make her understand. When she said she did, I thought everything was going to be okay. Then--
[His voice trembles and he stops to take another deep breath to calm it.]
She found me one day a few weeks later. I was out with Oscar taking care of some business and she...she killed herself in front of me.
[Diarmuid's eyes fly open, their corners moistened by tears. It's a sure sign of not only how tired he is that he can't control his emotions better, but how much this one incident has shaped him.]
How can I want anything for myself when I regularly take so much from others? How can that be right?