towerofanimus | (no subject)

Characters: Luke and open.
Setting: Graveyard - Floor 48
Format: You pick.
Summary: Luke just had a massive info dump dropped on him, and now he has to try and figure himself out all over again.
Warnings: SO MANY GODDAMN FEELS.

Saber had escorted him back to his room after that whole... madness that went down in the middle of the hallway, but it wasn't like Luke could do anything at the moment. He felt... hurt, crushed; like something had smashed his insides to bits and all that was left was a pasty goo dripping out of his ears. He laid on his bed and rolled around for a little while, but it didn't do anything to assuage that feeling.

That was why he headed out, up to the forty-eighth floor where the graveyard was. He'd been meaning to for awhile -- he needed to check for Tear's gravestone after all -- but he hadn't exactly been willing to actually do it. Right now, though, he needed the peace and quiet away from everyone else... and when he finally located her grave marker, he sat down before it, curled up on the crowded, cold earth with a sigh.

...he will kill ten thousand people. That's what his future on Auldrant held for him.

Guy, his best friend since forever, was really royalty, and was hiding a secret from him that he "didn't need to know."

Just how much didn't he "need to know?"

He wanted to curl up and cry again, but he had already done plenty of that. Now he knew; he was a murderer, and ignorant, selfish murderer, and it was far too late for him to do a damn thing about it. How wrong he was about himself... he would have hated to see his Shadow now.

Luke let out a sigh as he huddled himself into a ball, able to feel Amnon against his chest from the cheagle's usual hiding place under his coat.

"Tear... I wish you were still here," he finally murmured softly. "I don't know what I'm supposed to do now. I don't know how I can fix this... please, help me..."

He curled himself up tighter, burying his face in his knees.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

Was Luke a bad person? No. Initially, his attitude and demeanor made one think that, but in the end, Luke was a product of the Score. He couldn't be bothered to go over Luke's upbringing and his issues with that. No, Luke wasn't a bad person. Jade was a bad person. He had a list as long as the sky was wide and just as speckled.

"You're not a saint, no. Arguably, none of us are." He paused here. Comfort was never his strong suit. Like himself, you were supposed to shoulder your burdens, care for yourself. But Luke... "The bad side of you was just that. The bad side. It's not all you are, and it won't be as long as you realize that."

Luke let out a faint noise, glancing over at Jade. After a moment, he let out a faint breath, rubbing the back of his neck.

"...yeah, that sounds like what Yu-sensei said to me..." he murmured faintly. "Guess it must be true if you're telling me too."

He let out a weak sounding laugh.

"Still... ten thousand people..." Luke continued, making a face. "I know I'd never let Van manipulate me into doing that now, but... how am I supposed to handle this?"

Jade let out a breath, looking at the tombstone and gritting his teeth. What should he say? He wasn't great at this he knew that. However, Luke needed something, someone to help him.

He wasn't that person, but he was here now and he couldn't be so cold-hearted as to ignore the boy.

"Recognize your mistake as that. A mistake. You can do nothing now to prevent or ignore it. It will take a while, but what can you do?" He almost paused, but he kept on talking even if he didn't want to. It was starting to feel like he was talking about something else, to someone else.

"The pain never goes away, but you learn that, in time, it makes you stronger. You use the pain to spur you on to better yourself and those around you." Jade blinked, shifting a bit like he was going to get up. He forgot why he didn't do heart-to-hearts. It always ended up with him saying something stupid.

Luke was surprisingly quiet as he took all that in, absently toeing at the dirt of Tears grave. For a moment it seemed like he had drifted off into his own little world, and wasn't coming out of it any time soon. That was, until Jade moved; then Luke's hand snapped out, grabbing a hold of his arm.

"Jade... thanks..." Luke murmured, letting his hand drop. "I figured you didn't like this sort of thing, but I really needed to hear that."

When Luke suddenly grabbed him, Jade probably looked a tad more surprised than normal. He stared a moment longer before he nodded to him.

"I don't." But. You needed it, Luke, and for some reason, Jade couldn't find it within himself to joke about 10,000 dead people or Luke's role in it.

Luke managed a weak smile, before leaning back with a heavy sigh.

"...I can't wait till I'm stronger. I'll be happy to beat the crap out of Asch."

Jade's smile came and went quickly before he shifted to place his hands on his knees. He felt heavy and tired as he pushed himself up to stand, knees popping as he straightened himself.

"I'll bring popcorn, then." His hands returned to his pockets as he remained where he was.

Luke blinked up at him, surprised... before he started cracking up, wrapping his arms around his stomach. Oh damn... now all he had was the mental image of Jade and Yu hanging out, eating popcorn, while he pummeled Asch in the face.

Worth. It.

Jade couldn't help the small smile that curved his lips when Luke laughed. He'd never been able to actually make that kind of transition for anyone, from sorrow to laughter.

"It'll be quite the show, I'm sure."