Down the Hatch

[terreifying]

Characters: [AU1] Rei and you!
Setting: cafeteria, July 4
Format: anything goes
Summary: Rei hosts a hotdog eating competition
Warnings: none yet except for descriptions of Rei's eating.

[Today, starting from lunchtime, diners might notice something odd about the cafeteria. Rei had pushed several tables together and covered them with piles of hot dogs. Chairs surrounded the tables and a crayon sign, standing out from all the hot dogs, was in the center of the tables.]



[And Rei herself was sitting in one of the chairs. She was already gulping down hot dogs at the rate of one per mouthful. Her mouth was seemingly distended to show a gaping maw and white teeth too many in number to belong in a human mouth.]

[Indeed, if anyone takes up the challenge, it might be a formidable one...]

Comments

[hemoeroticism]

[ ... Welp. He didn't eat hot dogs - at least, not in contests - but this was definitely a bizarre challenge as far as he was concerned. And such a shame, too. Right after that wonderful monster hunt. ]

Are you bored already, Ayanami-chan? [ An exaggerated yawn. ] Cover them in chocolate, and you can get Shiro in on this. Assuming she isn't... Aha, scorned by the loss of those monsters' love. ✩

[terreifying]

[Rei quickly gulps down her latest hot dog.]

Really? Do they taste good covered in chocolate?

[hemoeroticism]

Shiro would willingly eat the oatmeal if it was covered in chocolate. As far as my opinion goes... Well, I'm still waiting on Ruana to ask me on a dinner date. ✩ [ Though its unlikely she has Deadman parts here. And it wouldn't be advisable to eat that particular other white meat rare. ]

That's one of the few things I miss about my world. Those annoyingly clingy twins were such good cooks, even if they looked for love in all of the wrong places.

[terreifying]

You like Ruana? Do you want me to help set you guys up?

[Maybe love would be able to redeem Ruana and make her nicer...]

Ooh, that sounds nice. Where they your personal cooks or something?

[hemoeroticism]

Aha~! ✩ [ Hagire claps his hands, laughing. ] As beautifully irrational as she is, my heart belongs to my beloved Wretched Egg. But in another world, she'd have made for the perfect co-worker. Her and Jason. ✩

But no. To be perfectly honest, I'm a bit more picky of an eater.

[terreifying]

[She nods.]

What work did you do, then? And what sort of foods do you like to eat? Is it hard to get it in the Tower?

[hemoeroticism]

Mm... a lot of work. Most recently, I was a Deadman who participated in the Carnival Corpse. ✩ [ Technically true. He did participate in one Carnival Corpse match while impersonating Toto Sakigami, though he wasn't supposed to be a participant while fighting against the Forgeries. He just... showed up. Hagire couldn't resist the urge to not only take Toto's body out for a proper test drive (that totally one-sided fight against Daida Hibana did not count), but to humiliate Tamaki in the process. ]

Other Branches of Sin. Hummingbird was here for a while, and... well... let's just say Wretched Egg's is a delicacy she doesn't share nearly as often as I'd like. [ Plus, he's not suicidal enough to try using hers. Without her healing factor, he's tear his fragile body apart trying to use it, assuming it even works at all. ]

[terreifying]

Hm...so you drink blood? Or can you only drink special blood? What about the monsters? Can you drink their blood?

[hemoeroticism]

Like I said, I'm a very picky eater. I'm a bit of a... connoisseur when it comes to blood.

[terreifying]

[She nods.]

So Deadman blood tastes better than everybody else's blood? What makes it so delicious?

[hemoeroticism]

A Branch of Sin, of course. If I drink the blood of another Deadman, I get to steal their powers for myself. ✩

[terreifying]

[She nods.]

So how many powers do you have now?

[hemoeroticism]

Aside from the Wretched Egg's, and Woodpecker's unique one?

All of them. ✩

[terreifying]

Wow, that's pretty cool.

[She grabs another hot dog to much on.]

I sorta wanna see what you can do with those abilities, now.

[hemoeroticism]

Didn't you see it already?

[terreifying]

Yeah, I saw you kill all the zombies. Were those the powers you took from all of the other Deadmen?

[The whips and fire and such.]

[hemoeroticism]

Yep! ✩

[ He's clearly proud of himself, Rei. Can't you tell? ]

[terreifying]

[She can tell.]

Too bad none of these Deadman powers is an eating power.

[And there goes another hot dog.]

[hemoeroticism]

No, I guess they're not... hmm, come to think of it, what is Masu's Branch of Sin?

[ That extreme omnivore. He brings a hand to his chin. Damn it, this is gonna annoy him all day. ]

Do I even have that one? ✩

[terreifying]

Maybe if he ever gets here, you can ask him.

[undefines]

An eating contest...?

[Hm... Well, in the wild, eating was something like a competition just by necessity. But, in a situation like this one, where food would be provided to them regardless, it seems a little pointless to Nue. She sets her hands on her hips, leaning in to study the spectacle in front of her.]

...Having a mouth like that must be convenient.

[terreifying]

[She swallows down her latest mouthful of hot dog and grins.]

Of course it is. Eating is so much easier like this. How about you? Can you do this with your mouth?

[undefines]

I can't. I'm a little jealous.

[terreifying]

[She holds out a hot dog.]

You're still welcome to have a contest with me, though. Wouldn't it be cooler if you could beat me with speed alone?

[hemoeroticism]

I think that's one of the few Deadman I hope never shows up here.