when the mind tortures the soul

[bowandblade]

Characters: Archer [AU3] and open
Setting: Any floor for August 12-15; any floor between dorms and floor 25 for August 16
Format: Action brackets to start. I'll follow preference after that.
Summary: Is there anything that can unsettle the King of Heroes' heart?
Warnings: Shadow children. Character death for August 16.


August 12

[The first smiling shadow had appeared on his bed on Sunday, so silent and unobtrusive that it might as well have been a second shadow. Archer had peered at it silently, suspiciously poked at it, but soon enough ignored it to go through his day. All is fairly well on the first day.

Receiving Ayaka's glasses in his mailbox does nothing for his mood. He spends a good portion of the time on floor 58, skewering countless corpses and cutting into them as a means of releasing his anger.

When he returns to his room, he finds the note pointing him in the direction of the library. With the glasses still in hand, Archer hangs out there.]



August 13

[They had started speaking in whispers yesterday. Barely audible little sounds, wisps of longer sentences that seemed to be cut off. On Tuesday, those whispers growl louder and more coherent.]

Our king, blessed by the gods. Why did you not save us?

We are from your world, torn and ruined. You sadden us, King. Everything is gone, even the ruins of what you ruled.

You do not know. You do not know. You do not remember the world falling apart, do you? You, who must remember everything.

Everything is ruined, destroyed, empty... Woe be to all because of Gilgamesh.

[There are many of them, and they feed off of him even as they irritate him. But he cannot lash out against them or chase them off. Cannot outrun them. He cannot sit still in the tower, instead climbing and constantly moving.]



August 14

Archer.

[The voice is soft and weak, strained and familiar. His title instead of his proper name has him looking to the shadow children that are following him -- fewer now than yesterday, but still wavering and vaguely familiar behind those white, wide grins.]

I never got to thank you. For what you did. Saber came back with the potion, from you.

[His lips part as he realizes what the shadow -- what she -- is saying. His eyes widen underneath the fringe of his disheveled hair, no longer raked back.]

And now I never will. Never, never. I'm from your world, our world, and I was never saved. I never drank the antidote, and the world ended.

[Archer doesn't know why he feels lightheaded. Why it affects him as much as it does. But he turns and bows his head, walking away from Ayaka's voice. He heads to floor 7, to the swimming pool, and dives into its depths. To distract himself.]



August 15

[The tiredness did not completely leave him after yesterday, evident from the faded violet of his collar. The shadows that follow him are fewer now, quieter in their lamenting. He doesn't have the energy to be angry at them, to deny their existences.]

Archer.

[He recognizes the voice and looks up.] I was expecting you to talk yesterday, when your Master did. Holy sword wielder.

She had her time. And now I have mine.

[It had not been so long since he had heard Saber's voice, but there is still that clip of tension that had eased with the Saber he had met in the tower. He walks through the lower flowers, floors 10 and 11, as if meaning to drown out the shadow's voice with the sound of flowing water.]

The King of Heroes. That is what you were. Your ancient kingdom may be gone, but you were still the King of Heroes.

[He says nothing. He needs no reminder of what he is.]

What will you rule now? There are no more heroes. No more Heroic Spirits. No more wars.

You are the King of Nothing. Of No One. Of Nowhere.

Now you are as you have acted. You are no king.



August 16

[Archer has trouble climbing out of bed in the morning. It's a matter of going through the motions, of trying to focus. He is so weary that he almost doesn't notice that the mass of shadows that had been following him had dispersed to somewhere beyond his immediate periphery.

In their place is a single shadow, smiling its white, wide grin and only vaguely familiar.

But now, he knows what the shadow is. Why it has persisted for so long. Why it would not leave when the others could be chased away. Why it does not speak.]

There is a place. A meadow. I want you to see it.

[He has a long way to walk. But he will walk. He will journey, just as he did in another lifetime.

And the shadow child walks behind him, just as another had in another lifetime.]

Comments

August 16, closed; cw: character death

[bowandblade]

He sank down amongst the flowers, shoulders slumped and head bowed. Walking this far had seemed to take so long, with his spirit seeming on the verge of fading away. Was he dying? Was this all a nasty trick by the administrators to watch them all lie down and succumb to their will?

He found it hard to care, even as one whose fear of death had sent him on a journey that lasted decades.

Gilgamesh.

The androgynous voice was quiet, but still audible over the rumble of distant thunder. He did not look up, instead focusing on his legs folded in front of him.

"I should have known."

You realized. You remembered.

"Remembered?" A single note of a bitter laugh escaped, even as he felt a heavy weight growing in his chest. "I could never forget you."

There was a thoughtful hum, but no words in reply from the shadow child. Gilgamesh sighed and shut his eyes; if he was quiet and closed his eyes, he could almost imagine barefoot feet softly brushing through the blades of grass.

You must be tired, my friend. Lie down.

He wanted to resist, but his body was already obeying -- a sign of the weariness that had overtaken him. The grass rustled around him, and he breathed in the scent of flowers while idly wondering just how long it would take for him to fall asleep.

It has been a long, long time.

The voice was close, as if his friend had chosen to sit at his side. He managed a sound of agreement, folding his hands together low against his ribcage.

You should realize ... that this is only possible because the world ended. Because humanity is gone.

His eyelids twitched. His lips tensed into a frown.

We could only be reunited when your duty was completed.

He felt that weight in his chest tighten at the reminder of his purpose. His head moved slightly in a nod.

I am ... surprised, to be honest. I had not known I had a soul to ruin.

"Of course you have a soul." His words come in a rush, edged with what little fervor he could still muster. "You fool. You fool."

I apologize, my friend. He could hear a sound that imitated an exhale, a sigh. I could not stay away when I realized you were here.

"I would not want you to."

Even if it pains you now?

"I would not want you to." He breathed heavily, as if he had yelled those words and not barely hissed them. "Stay with me." There was a thread of pleading in his tone.

There was the briefest chime of laughter. My king is still so selfish. You would have me stay this way, ruined and warped and set adrift? How cruel.

To that, Gilgamesh could say nothing. He wanted to be selfish, to have his companion -- whose death had haunted him and remained with him even now -- by his side once again. But he could not forget what the shadows had said: They were all that was left of those who had been of his world. His people. His dead, his living, his yet unborn.

His fingers clenched against his stomach. His teeth gnashed together as he felt heat rising behind his eyes.

"How many lifetimes must I wait?"

This was little more than a continuation of this week of taunts. His dear friend was beyond his reach in death while whole, and a shadow that he could hear but not touch while ruined.

I do not know; you are the one who sees the future in your dreams. But I will return to the earth, with the dead all around me, without my dear friend at my side. When there was no reply forthcoming from the king, that familiar voice again floated down to his ears. Enough of that. While I remain, let me leave you with one more memory.

Gilgamesh nodded again, the motion barely noticeable with his movements so weak. He could hear humming, the introduction to a song, as his consciousness began to fade.

I am from your world. I am yours. I will always be watching you from the earth below. Until humanity is gone.

"Until humanity is ... gone..."

- - - - -

Gilgamesh's body remained on the meadow even as the storm raged. Anyone who came across the body would be greeted by the sight of the corpse on its back with its face tilted to the ground, collar drained of color. To the side of the corpse was a single shadow child, a hand ghosting over Gilgamesh's hair but unable to touch it.

The shadow child stayed with the corpse, even after the retrieval unit came for it.

I couldn't decide between 13th or 15th so I wrote something vague and now you have to pick

[looselips]

[Shinji has had just enough of these weird, grinning shadows. It's not just that they're irritating—they are, of course, but he never has more than one or two tailing him at any given time, and he finds them easy enough to shrug off and ignore. What he hates is what he can see they're doing to other people, the ones he concerns himself with.]

[So, of course he isn't happy when he finds his Servant and sees that he isn't alone. He promptly inserts himself between Archer and his escort, crossing his arms over his chest and scowling.]

Get lost, would you?

15th it is, then!

[bowandblade]

[Archer turns his head when Shinji's voice interrupts Saber's, and he watches as the little boy manages to scatter some of the shadows. The shadow child that had been speaking in Saber's voice lingers, then backs off.]

Hah. They will listen to you.

[Not that he had not seen such things happen around the tower already. But he was trying to find some of his humor.]

[looselips]

It's about time somebody around here wised up and listened to their better.

[He scoffs, trying to convey his usual tone of well, naturally, but he feels uneasy as he looks up at Archer. The Servant's lack of energy is obvious. As he moves to grab Archer's hand with his small one, Shinji's worry almost certainly comes across in his demeanor.]

Come on, let's get out of here. All those things do is spew a bunch of garbage, so there's no reason to hang around now.

[bowandblade]

[The tint of Archer's collar is much like pale lavender, visible where the collar of his jacket does not cover his neck. When he feels Shinji grab at his hand, he looks at his little Master with faint amusement.

It was good to see that the boy was not affected by this trickery.]

They are irritably loud and too persistent for their own good.

8/13

[fionnuisce]

Archer?

[Four shadows followed Waver himself, going apparently ignored. Waver wasn't stupid enough to walk all that closely to the Servant--alternate or not, he was still Gilgamesh. But it would have been wrong to say he wasn't concerned; Waver understood what these companions could do and how easily they could get into one's head.]

You seem annoyed. [Folding his arms, Waver tried a somewhat direct approach.]

[bowandblade]

[He pauses in his walk to look at the man, eyes narrowing in a moment of distracted thought before smoothing into a more bored look. If not for his general demeanor, hands in his pockets and head tilted to one side, he would be more comparable to the alternate selves he had the pleasure of learning about.]

You are not? These shadows are such nuisances.

[They were more than that, now that they were coherent.]

[fionnuisce]

I just stopped listening to them. [He shrugged, indifferent.] I'm not going to buy into some spectral guilt trip.

[bowandblade]

[He flicks a wrist dismissively, scoffing audibly.]

Their mere presences are annoying me. They follow, surround, and make nuisances of themselves.

[Though they seemed to be "behaving" themselves for the moment. Maybe it was the presence of another tower resident.]

august 15

[chainsawn]

[ Urotsuki, having no strong living ties to her own world for the most part - and not even ones that are stronger than the new ones she's made in the tower after a year - is surprisingly shadow-free. There's a small difference about her though but it's not too big, the only difference is that she's wearing Kidou's goggles around her neck now - they're heavily patched up so they look a little weird, but she doesn't seem to mind.

She's on floor 10, watching the aquarium as she does more often when she notices the very familiar person passing by. She doesn't seem to notice the shadows though, she's too occupied with him as she passes - she even waves a little to pull his attention. ]

Hey, hey.. I've been trying to practice smiling. Want to see? [ She's speaking with her usual blank voice, like she's completely unaware of the situation. She's just a little happy to see him. ]

[bowandblade]

[Archer had been focusing on the various fish to take his mind off of the continuous murmurs of the shadows when he noticed he wasn't alone. He blinks slowly at Urotsuki, as if trying to place her, but reaching over a putting both hands to her hair as if attempting to smooth out the strands that stick out.]

Hmm. You have had quite some time to practice, little one.

[chainsawn]

It's still not very good though. It's hard to do, so I really need to practice a lot.

[ She nods a little as she says it as if she's confirming the fact to herself, but she's at least not moving while he's holding her hair like that, still just staring up at him. ]

.. But.. I wanted to try. For when we're going to meet the legends..

[bowandblade]

[He finishes with his thoughtful little motions with her hair, dropping his hands back to his sides and smiling down at her. It's a somewhat tired smile, but a smile all the same.]

Very well. Smile for me, little one; I will see how you intend to greet legends.

15th?

[crouching_sin]

[There's someone seated by the lake on the eleventh floor, his haori off and the Command Seals on his hand visible. He's surrounded by a mass of shadows - it's hard to count, given that they all seem to bunch together and through each other. But he looks up at the sound of the voice and the footsteps.]

Having troubles?

[His own collar is lighter than it should be, but otherwise he doesn't seem horribly affected by the shadows around him.]

[bowandblade]

[The eleventh floor was one of those that Archer enjoyed for its ... exotic take at nature. It's a little unfortunate that he arrives on the floor with shadows in tow, weary from his exposure to them but still steadfast in his decision to ignore them as best he can.

At the inquiry, he turns to look at the young man who had spoken. His lips tug into an amused smile as he takes in the amount of shadows surrounding him.]

It looks like you have your own troubles.

[crouching_sin]

Heh. None that I can't handle. I'll be fine. It seems this plight isn't uncommon from what I've been seeing, though.

[He tucks his hands into his pockets as he stands. No sense in being rude, after all.]

[bowandblade]

[Archer's eyes flit down to his hands as they move, but he soon averts his attention back to the other man's face. He hums, making a small gesture to the nearby shadows.]

I have seen most with a few. Not so many as to make a small army. [An exaggeration of what he saw, but probably not by much. His own numerous shadows were representatives of different eras, different lifetimes.]

August 14th

[no_longer_a_king]

Arturia was practicing swimming, if only because focusing on physical activity distracted her from the growing crowd of shadows following her. They did not seem to want to follow her into the water, but it did not stop the angry shouts that cut to the heart of it.

So it was a shock to see Gilgamesh head to the pool, then abruptly dive in. Arturia was not an experienced swimmer, nor an expert, and she had to fight to stay afloat in the splash he'd left behind him.

"Archer! Look before you jump!" she snapped, more because of a few shadows whispering she should be drowned over and over for not following through on her duties than because she was angry.

[bowandblade]

He had not even noticed someone else was already in the pool when he had jumped in, but there was the proof before his eyes -- a pair of shapely legs and a girl's soft curves visible amongst the bubbles risen from both of them thrashing in the pool. His laughter came out in the form of a long stream of bubbles that rose to the surface, cut off when he finally swam back up to breathe properly.

His hair stuck to his forehead and cheeks as he successfully turned in the water to face her.

And he was still wearing his armor. Didn't exactly remember to remove that. Whoops.

That was at least easily fixed -- with the water around him glowing gold as his raiment disappeared.

"I am looking now!" he defended himself, as if that was helpful in any way. "And I see you are no worse for wear, King of Knights."

[no_longer_a_king]

And Arturia did not own a swimsuit, so he got a very good look at her indeed. Not that she cared very much, nor did she even blush when his own clothes disappeared into golden dust. No, instead she gave him an annoyed look as she fought to get the rhythm of swimming back.

"You could have drowned me!"

Soon, she was treading water again, a look of utmost concentration on her face because, damn it, she would beat Lancelot in a swimming race if it was the last thing she did. Even if she knew it was futile given he had been raised by the Lady of the Lake.

[bowandblade]

Archer tilted his head and pursed his lips together at the annoyed look on Saber's fair face, as if he could not comprehend her anger. Then he laughed, the shadows forgotten for the moment, as he kept afloat not too far away from her.

"Nonsense! If that had happened, I would have swept you from the water and resuscitated you!" He smiled and winked. "What a tragedy it would be, to see that face of yours bloated and blue."

August 15: (apologies: once more!)

[chevalier_mal_fet]

[It is a stolen moment he spends by the Lake. A Lake more improbable than all the rest.
The fountains fall and flow, hushing the voices of the Shadows that trail him-- the music of the falling Water bringing to mind his Mother's voice.

But there is another voice intruding that does not belong to any Shadow, one familiar to him.]

Archer.
[They have not spoken since their Battle on the Mountainside, though things had been eased between them to a degree. Much has passed since then-- it seems an age of time. The Servant's collar is faded lilac. He would not see Gilgamesh-- he would see none of them so.]

What is it haunts you?

[bowandblade]

[Archer gazes towards the lake when he hears that voice, giving the knight a steady look. Then his lips turn upward in a slight smirk.]

That seems like a foolish question to ask when you are trailed by these shadows as well.

[chevalier_mal_fet]

[With a lift of one shoulder, Lancelot shrugs off the admittedly mild insult.]
I am. Mine reproach me with familiar Words I heard in Life-- that I yet hear in Sleep or Madness.
Who is it speaks to you, then? If you will speak of it to me.

[bowandblade]

[The smirk doesn't slip from his face as he glances at that shadow with its wide white grin and its whispers that come in Saber's voice. He hums contemplatively, then shrugs.]

An entire world. [Considering the amount of shadows that seem to be trailing after him, some closer than others and others peeking out from the scenery, it likely wasn't much of an exaggeration.] But it is the holy sword wielder who wants my ear the most at the moment.