Diarmuid Ua Duibhne (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
oathshackledbird) wrote in ![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png)
towerofanimus2014-03-14 07:17 pm
oathshackledbird) wrote in towerofanimus2014-03-14 07:17 pm
I would rather Fly than Fall...
Characters: Diarmuid Ua Duibhne (oathshackledbird) and open to anyone who wants to run into him! (Closed prompt at the end for Waver Velvet, fionnuisce. Close prompt now added for Reno, midgarhorizon , and Shion, savedbyasong !)
Setting: Room 2-16, the hallways, Room 2-04, and anywhere on the Dorm Levels/Safe floors of the Tower.
Format: Starting in prose, pick your poison after that!
Summary: Log to cover several things including the 'Tower of Jenova' event, dating from the 14th to the 23rd. (A few backdated prompts will likely be added later and, depending on the Mod Event which lasts from the 23rd to the 27th, prompts for it may be added as well.) After denying for a few days anything is wrong, Diarmuid gives in and goes looking for Waver in hopes that the magus can help cure whatever is making him feel so sick. Cue camp out/sleepover in room 2-04 with possible feverish wanderings from time to time. My apologies in advance to the other occupants of 2-04...
Warnings: Diarmuid's cap for the event is LI2, which means he will be very sick and sporting a rash after a while. While he will have mood dips and periods of negativity throughout the event, he won't be having any of the other, more severe symptoms associated with the higher levels and won't be dying. The negative emotions that are mentioned in the prompts will be less prominent during the early part of the event and get stronger as the event goes on. Specific Warnings for negative emotions, mentions of death/death wishes, things related to the flu/respiratory infections/fever, and potential mild violence and mild mentions of blood. If Diarmuid runs into any of those with higher infection levels, their threads will be marked with that character's level of infection (LI) should the thread progress to anything besides them talking. Threads with characters that have higher infection levels should be assumed to have warnings similar to those in the open mingle including mentions of body modification, violence, blood, and injury.
Note: I would like to request that if your character knows or suspects that Sephiroth is behind the illness going around, that they not say anything about that to Diarmuid at this time. I am an evil mun and am making him wait until after the event at least to find out--if he even does then.But he was just so sure Sephiroth was up to something... Thanks guys!
The Gym, 3-7 in the morning (Closed to Reno and Shion):
This meeting is long overdue. Even though the last time Diarmuid talked to Shion the boy seemed to have made great steps in better controlling his emotions and berserk outbreaks, the meeting is still necessary. So many times people discover things about themselves in this place only to lose that new information because of something happening. Diarmuid wants to make sure the new discoveries Shion has made aren't lost like that. Not when they have done so much to help the boy stabilize himself.
While he waits, Diarmuid pulls out his swords and starts doing a few simple practice strikes with them. It won't be long until Reno and Shion arrive, but it's hard for him to sit still in the gym. Especially considering he's in a pretty good mood. The ring on his finger catches his eye for a moment and his smile widens.
Okay, a really good mood...
Room 2-16, 3-14 in the morning:
As hard as he is trying to deny it, when Diarmuid wakes up feeling like he is on fire and being smothered at the same time, he can't keep doing it any longer. Somehow, someway, he is sick and not just slightly sick. Very sick. The first few days he had ignored it figuring it to be a product of his working himself too hard, the room switches, or even a bit of a recurrence of the exhaustion that had plagued him after helping to recharge the Tower...
Then Grainne had arrived and everything had just gotten worse. Literally. It's almost as if his emotional uncertainty has somehow been feeding whatever is wrong with him. He doesn't blame her at all, but it is very clear he his condition is going downhill. Today is only proof positive of that.
His thoughts drift to cursing Jason because this reminds him too much of the sickness he had heard went around the December before he arrived. Of course, it can't be Jason this time because he is dead, but might someone else have set it off instead? If the response Waver had gotten to his request is any indication, Zo is in charge this month as normal. He would never do something like this. Is Ruana still playing games behind the scenes?
The thought makes him shiver...or that just might be chills from the fever. Diarmuid tries to pull himself from the bed, but ends up collapsing instead, breaking into a fit of shivers hard enough that his vision swims and he realizes he can't just stay here. He needs to find a healer. He needs to find Waver...
To be honest, he is kind of surprised Waver hasn't found him already, but he has kept distant on the bond lately not wanting to drain his partner more than necessary. That and with Grainne arriving, Diarmuid would be lying if he didn't say he is afraid of what he might find there...or not find there as the case may be.
He tries to rise again and finally manages to get to his feet. After swaying for a moment, he stumbles to the door and into the hallway. Here's hoping Waver is actually in his room and not at the Laboratory for once. Diarmuid's not so sure he will make it that far...
Dorm hallways, 2nd Floor, 3-14 in the morning:
Everything is spinning and it's starting to make Diarmuid sick to his stomach. He's never felt this bad before, not even when he was alive. Sickness, just had avoided him. Maybe he had been lucky or maybe his father had been watching out for him. In ether event, he's not used to feeling like this. His arms wrap around his waist and he takes a deep breath trying to force himself to walk in a straight line.
It's not going so well. Hopefully, he won't run into anyone too hard...
Room 2-04, anytime on 3-14 to 3-23:
If he had more energy or will Diarmuid would probably be tossing and turning, but as it is he is just laying in Waver's bed feeling guilty. They keep trying to heal him and while it seems like it works for a while, he always gets worse again. He supposes he should be glad he's not hallucinating. That had been part of Jason's virus, hadn't it? Or...maybe he is and he just doesn't realize it. Is his brain trying to tell him just how much of a burden he is on everyone? Is that why the healing only ever holds for a while?
Dorm hallways/Safe Tower floors anytime on 3-14 to 3-23:
He slips away sometimes when they aren't watching close enough or think he's asleep. Diarmuid can't help it. As tired as he is, his mind just tells him to run and get away from them so that he's not bothering them anymore. It doesn't help that the urge grows stronger as time passes. How long until they stop leaving him alone? How long until he runs out of chances to free them from the burden he's creating?
Funny, though, he can't ever bring himself to go onto any of the really dangerous floors. That would take care of things pretty quickly, wouldn't it? So, why can't he?
Room 2-04, 3-23 Kill Switch Activation (Closed to Waver):
Perhaps the hallucinations have finally found him after all, because at the moment it feels like something is strangling him...but not strangling him in the normal manner. Instead, its like someone has wrapped their hands around his very core, pulling and crushing it. Trying to rip it away from him. The feeling grows stronger, causing a small frightened sound to slip from his lips. He's not sure what he should do. Should he pull away from Waver to make sure this doesn't affect him too? Should he reach out for him and use the strength his knows his partner will provide to help fight whatever this is?
Should he let go and just stop being a burden?
Diarmuid's exhausted mind is still pondering all this when a the pull suddenly becomes a sharp, searing yank. This time he cannot help but cry out both in pain and fear. As he does, his heart and brain finally slam into agreement. No more dancing around a decision he made long ago. No more waiting for him to consciously realize what he has already unconsciously figured out. He opens the bond and reaches out for Waver just as hard and as desperately as he can...
Help me! Please... I don't want to leave you!
oathshackledbird) and open to anyone who wants to run into him! (Closed prompt at the end for Waver Velvet, fionnuisce. Close prompt now added for Reno, midgarhorizon , and Shion, savedbyasong !)Setting: Room 2-16, the hallways, Room 2-04, and anywhere on the Dorm Levels/Safe floors of the Tower.
Format: Starting in prose, pick your poison after that!
Summary: Log to cover several things including the 'Tower of Jenova' event, dating from the 14th to the 23rd. (A few backdated prompts will likely be added later and, depending on the Mod Event which lasts from the 23rd to the 27th, prompts for it may be added as well.) After denying for a few days anything is wrong, Diarmuid gives in and goes looking for Waver in hopes that the magus can help cure whatever is making him feel so sick. Cue camp out/sleepover in room 2-04 with possible feverish wanderings from time to time. My apologies in advance to the other occupants of 2-04...
Warnings: Diarmuid's cap for the event is LI2, which means he will be very sick and sporting a rash after a while. While he will have mood dips and periods of negativity throughout the event, he won't be having any of the other, more severe symptoms associated with the higher levels and won't be dying. The negative emotions that are mentioned in the prompts will be less prominent during the early part of the event and get stronger as the event goes on. Specific Warnings for negative emotions, mentions of death/death wishes, things related to the flu/respiratory infections/fever, and potential mild violence and mild mentions of blood. If Diarmuid runs into any of those with higher infection levels, their threads will be marked with that character's level of infection (LI) should the thread progress to anything besides them talking. Threads with characters that have higher infection levels should be assumed to have warnings similar to those in the open mingle including mentions of body modification, violence, blood, and injury.
Note: I would like to request that if your character knows or suspects that Sephiroth is behind the illness going around, that they not say anything about that to Diarmuid at this time. I am an evil mun and am making him wait until after the event at least to find out--if he even does then.
The Gym, 3-7 in the morning (Closed to Reno and Shion):
This meeting is long overdue. Even though the last time Diarmuid talked to Shion the boy seemed to have made great steps in better controlling his emotions and berserk outbreaks, the meeting is still necessary. So many times people discover things about themselves in this place only to lose that new information because of something happening. Diarmuid wants to make sure the new discoveries Shion has made aren't lost like that. Not when they have done so much to help the boy stabilize himself.
While he waits, Diarmuid pulls out his swords and starts doing a few simple practice strikes with them. It won't be long until Reno and Shion arrive, but it's hard for him to sit still in the gym. Especially considering he's in a pretty good mood. The ring on his finger catches his eye for a moment and his smile widens.
Okay, a really good mood...
Room 2-16, 3-14 in the morning:
As hard as he is trying to deny it, when Diarmuid wakes up feeling like he is on fire and being smothered at the same time, he can't keep doing it any longer. Somehow, someway, he is sick and not just slightly sick. Very sick. The first few days he had ignored it figuring it to be a product of his working himself too hard, the room switches, or even a bit of a recurrence of the exhaustion that had plagued him after helping to recharge the Tower...
Then Grainne had arrived and everything had just gotten worse. Literally. It's almost as if his emotional uncertainty has somehow been feeding whatever is wrong with him. He doesn't blame her at all, but it is very clear he his condition is going downhill. Today is only proof positive of that.
His thoughts drift to cursing Jason because this reminds him too much of the sickness he had heard went around the December before he arrived. Of course, it can't be Jason this time because he is dead, but might someone else have set it off instead? If the response Waver had gotten to his request is any indication, Zo is in charge this month as normal. He would never do something like this. Is Ruana still playing games behind the scenes?
The thought makes him shiver...or that just might be chills from the fever. Diarmuid tries to pull himself from the bed, but ends up collapsing instead, breaking into a fit of shivers hard enough that his vision swims and he realizes he can't just stay here. He needs to find a healer. He needs to find Waver...
To be honest, he is kind of surprised Waver hasn't found him already, but he has kept distant on the bond lately not wanting to drain his partner more than necessary. That and with Grainne arriving, Diarmuid would be lying if he didn't say he is afraid of what he might find there...or not find there as the case may be.
He tries to rise again and finally manages to get to his feet. After swaying for a moment, he stumbles to the door and into the hallway. Here's hoping Waver is actually in his room and not at the Laboratory for once. Diarmuid's not so sure he will make it that far...
Dorm hallways, 2nd Floor, 3-14 in the morning:
Everything is spinning and it's starting to make Diarmuid sick to his stomach. He's never felt this bad before, not even when he was alive. Sickness, just had avoided him. Maybe he had been lucky or maybe his father had been watching out for him. In ether event, he's not used to feeling like this. His arms wrap around his waist and he takes a deep breath trying to force himself to walk in a straight line.
It's not going so well. Hopefully, he won't run into anyone too hard...
Room 2-04, anytime on 3-14 to 3-23:
If he had more energy or will Diarmuid would probably be tossing and turning, but as it is he is just laying in Waver's bed feeling guilty. They keep trying to heal him and while it seems like it works for a while, he always gets worse again. He supposes he should be glad he's not hallucinating. That had been part of Jason's virus, hadn't it? Or...maybe he is and he just doesn't realize it. Is his brain trying to tell him just how much of a burden he is on everyone? Is that why the healing only ever holds for a while?
Dorm hallways/Safe Tower floors anytime on 3-14 to 3-23:
He slips away sometimes when they aren't watching close enough or think he's asleep. Diarmuid can't help it. As tired as he is, his mind just tells him to run and get away from them so that he's not bothering them anymore. It doesn't help that the urge grows stronger as time passes. How long until they stop leaving him alone? How long until he runs out of chances to free them from the burden he's creating?
Funny, though, he can't ever bring himself to go onto any of the really dangerous floors. That would take care of things pretty quickly, wouldn't it? So, why can't he?
Room 2-04, 3-23 Kill Switch Activation (Closed to Waver):
Perhaps the hallucinations have finally found him after all, because at the moment it feels like something is strangling him...but not strangling him in the normal manner. Instead, its like someone has wrapped their hands around his very core, pulling and crushing it. Trying to rip it away from him. The feeling grows stronger, causing a small frightened sound to slip from his lips. He's not sure what he should do. Should he pull away from Waver to make sure this doesn't affect him too? Should he reach out for him and use the strength his knows his partner will provide to help fight whatever this is?
Should he let go and just stop being a burden?
Diarmuid's exhausted mind is still pondering all this when a the pull suddenly becomes a sharp, searing yank. This time he cannot help but cry out both in pain and fear. As he does, his heart and brain finally slam into agreement. No more dancing around a decision he made long ago. No more waiting for him to consciously realize what he has already unconsciously figured out. He opens the bond and reaches out for Waver just as hard and as desperately as he can...
Help me! Please... I don't want to leave you!
no subject
And I tried putting mint in it for you, too. You're lucky I practiced medicines so much or it would have been worse.
[She holds out the bowl for him, wishing she had brought napkins but had forgotten in her rush.]
Just... don't complain about the soup.
no subject
[The question is automatic and he seems a little ashamed for having said something after all the work she has done. He bows his head and then takes the soup, doing his best to eat it without spilling. It's hard, though, considering how much his hands are shaking.]
Why are you doing this?
[The question is asked softly before mouthfuls of soup.]
I thought you didn't want anything to do with me...
no subject
[Grainne sits and watches him for a moment before actually responding to the rest. It makes her uncomfortable, especially since she knows he's not in any real condition to talk about this.]
I found you wandering the hall almost delirious and refusing to go back to your room. What was I supposed to do? Just leave you there?
[The other reasons were answers she promised herself he didn't need to know.
Her expression softens slightly.]
You still think in all or nothing terms, don't you? How do you think I'd feel if I left the father of my children to wander around and fall prey to the dangers in this place?
no subject
[There is no reason to deny a problem that Diarmuid is well aware that he has, especially if she might have some insight into how he can better stop thinking like that.]
The world is grey now. I know that more than I ever have and yet...
[He shakes his head, toying with his spoon for a moment, before setting it down so he can look up at her.]
Grainne, you severed the bond between us. You told me we have no place in each other's new lives. That is about as all or nothing as you get. When you make a break like that...
[The food and the medicine seem to be helping a little and Diarmuid is thinking more clearly now. He sets the bowl on the nightstand and then moves to try to stand from the bed, doing his best to hide the fact that, even though he is feeling stronger, he's still shaking.]
...you do leave a person. Even if they are wandering sick and delirious in a hallway. I should go...
[Would he do any differently than she had? Probably not. But he wasn't the one who killed any trace of hope for a new friendship between them...]
no subject
If you want to leave I will not stop you, but stop being a fool.
[Anger at him colored her tone with a bare hint, fighting the urge to retort.]
Do you really want to talk about this now? It is not I that severed the bond between us first, it is you. I have only made it official, and absolved you of all responsibility toward me. There is no place for me and I will not come between you and another... Master.
no subject
[There is anger in his words, but the sharpness is lost as he collapses back to sit on the edge of the bed, energy momentarily spent. Diarmuid's eyes narrow in frustration at his own weakness, before he turns his gaze back to her.]
What was I suppose to do? Never did I think I would see you again. How did you even end up on the Throne of Heroes? What wish was so strong to have brought you back as a servant?
no subject
I know. I do not blame you for moving on, and I am not angry with you for that. In fact... I am glad you have someone that you love. If he makes you happy-- You... you need to understand--
[She cuts off, freezing for a moment before grabbing up the tray and moving to the door with it, and set it outside. It's more to give her time to think carefully on what she says. Their last conversation had gone so very well, after all...]
Neither of us are the same people we knew, you are right about that. You need to understand what I did was necessary.
[Growing quiet, she does not move from in front of the door.]
As for why I became a servant... that is my own business.
no subject
I...don't even know why it picked me. I'm not a hero and I don't even need the Grail for my wish...
[His voice is soft and uncertain. To be honest, Diarmuid's not sure why he's telling her this. Maybe it will help her understand better? Of course, maybe it will just make her more worried than ever about coming between himself and his new 'Master' instead...]
I just want a chance to serve my lord until the end with no interference. That is not so much to ask. It is hardly a wish. Nothing that requires all this effort and sacrifice surely. Why was I picked when there are so many with greater wishes out there? Wishes that would help more people...
Does it just mock me? Is that it? Is that why things went so badly? Why I was betrayed yet again? Or...
[He tilts his head slightly as a thought comes to mind.]
Was it just what was needed so I could come here and have a real chance at that wish? I...don't know... I am not sure even why I am saying this...
no subject
You were betrayed?
[Taking the extra blanket, she wraps it around his shoulders, seemingly unconcerned about what his wish meant. Almost as if she had expected something like that...]
That master did not deserve you. Nor did Fionn... may he be cursed for his foolishness, and me as well.
[She presses on his shoulders, urging him to lay back against the pillow.]
My wish is a selfish one, as were all my wishes in life.
no subject
[Diarmuid knows he should fight her as she pushes him back into bed and starts tucking him in, but he can't make himself do it, and the bed suddenly feels very good under his body again.]
Again...it doesn't help for long. Nothing helps for long...
[His voice is small and maybe even a little frightened as he closes his eyes.]
Am I going to die? Is that it?
no subject
[Grainne can't help herself here, for she presses her hand against his cheek, trying to dispel his worry.]
Why don't I tell you a story?
no subject
I appreciate it, but in the end if the drain becomes to great, just letting me die might be easier. I will still come back...it will just take longer.
[Better he die than cause a lot of his friends to be weak because of him...]
A story would be nice. What one will you tell me?
[He's probably not going to be awake long enough to hear it all, but it will be a better thing to think about as he falls to sleep than death will be.]
no subject
[Grainne sits down on the floor next to him, resting her head against the wall behind her, but then jerks upright when something he said got through to her.]
What do you mean, you'll come back but it'll take longer? Why do you want to die?
no subject
Has no one told you death isn't permanent here? The process recently...changed, but it is still in place. If you die or are killed, you will be returned to life a short time later. It's not pleasant, of course, but if it will keep everyone from exhausting themselves in a place as dangerous as this one, wouldn't it be better for me just to die? There is a chance I will cured of whatever is making me sick too when I return.
[Tension fills him as he pauses a moment and realizes how bad this must sound to her. Quickly, he continues.]
I don't really want to die. There are things that happen when you die too often. It was just a thought...
no subject
We... we're immortal here?
[Not even given the oblivion death? It makes Grainne extremely nervous, for some reason. Why she hadn't committed herself to die again the second she got here and learned what she had escapes her at the moment, but knowing now it would have been futile...]
Why would they put anyone through that... to suffer death over and over?
no subject
[Or until Ruana decides she needs a snack, but Diarmuid would rather not think too hard on that right now. He settles his head against the pillow again, eyes once more falling shut.]
The Administrators...they are not like us. To most of them we are toys if not worse. Some are more...sympathetic than others, but...
[Diarmuid frowns as he fights to find a way to properly explain the complicated mess the Administrators and their motives are. When he fails, he sighs.]
...we know so little for sure. So very little...and time is almost up.
no subject
This isn't what she wished for...]
The story is something that happened when I was living in a little cottage by the sea. It was a fine place, with sheep and cattle, and every spring wildflowers bloomed on the meadow. Every winter there would be terrible weather. It was a bad winter that it happened, and such fierce winds came from the ocean I thought the little cottage would be blown away.
One night, and it was very late at night, the weather was even worse than usual. I hadn't gone to sleep yet. There came a loud crash at the door... and then a soft little knock. Well, I was astonished that there was someone out in that gale, so I opened the door and in popped this tiny white lamb.
[She sits up to check if Diarmuid is asleep yet, pausing in her story just in case.]
no subject
[His voice is soft and grateful. Perhaps Diarmuid should tell her more about death and the time limit they are all facing, but he's so tired and he really doesn't want to be thinking about those things when sleep finally claims him.
The last thing he wants to do is wake up screaming with her around.]
Why do I get the feeling this is no normal lamb?
no subject
[She settles back down, pulling her knees to her chest.]
Of course, I let the lamb sit by the fire... and all was well until the lamb turned to me and asked if I had anything he could eat. I said yes, of course, and gave him a whole bag of grain... for it was the only thing I had to give a lamb.
[Closing her eyes, she tries to imagine the lamb sitting by the fire, trying to give the story life.]
And then the lamb slept. He was gone when I woke up, but with the empty bag and his muddy feet leaving a spot, I knew it hadn't been a dream.
The next night, the winds came up again and the rain was so fierce, I thought it would break the roof in! I had to set a pot underneath a leak, and said to my husband that we should fix it in the morning, lest the winds really did take the roof.
And then, when all had grown still, there came another crash and a knock, knock, knock at the door. And who do you think it was?
[Her voice steadily gets softer, the deeper into the story she went. Of course the whole thing is a complete fiction.]
The lamb came back, and it trotted over to the fire and asked if it could rest a while, just like the night before. I gave him a bag of grain and bade him rest the night. By the next morning, he was gone again, but so was the leak in the roof. I asked the cranky old man if he fixed it while I slept, but he said it must have been that lamb...
That night, the weather was even worse than before, and I was asleep dreaming troubled dreams when once again, that crash sounded at the door. It scared me awake, but when I went to open the door, there was nothing there but a battered old chest...
[She's almost whispering now, arms wrapped around her knees and almost ready to fall asleep herself. It's a strange feeling, having the need for sleep again.]
no subject
It doesn't make it any less interesting to listen to, though.
However, between the story, the warm blankets and being so tired, Diarmuid, no matter how much he wants to hear how the story ends, just cannot stay awake and falls a sleep sometime before she gets to the third night.
The look on his face as he sleeps is peaceful, though. There will be no nightmares to wake up screaming from this time.]
no subject
Carefully, she reaches for his hand again, holding it gently as if he might disappear, and starts to cry.
She doesn't mean to fall asleep like that, not at all... but she does.
How long were they like that? Minutes, or hours? She can't tell what time it is when she snaps awake and lifts her head, warily looking around the room. He's still there, though.
Quietly, she stands up and leaves, heading for the cafeteria for more food for him.]
no subject
He's a burden to her. She's cut her ties to him, but is too kind to just leave him like she should. He needs to go. He needs to stop troubling her like he has his whole life...
Diarmuid takes a deep breath to gather his strength and then pulls himself out of bed. A few moments later, he is gone, back to wandering as far away from her room as possible. He doesn't want to run into her again and make her feel like she has to take care of this useless piece of her past yet again...]
no subject
He said "Lord El-melloi II" didn't he?
She leaves the tray by Waver's door and leaves, going upstairs without looking back.]