04. upon thyself thy beauty's legacy

[keepscalm]

Characters: England and all of the cultured people. Open!
Setting: Floor 25.
Format: Starting action, but will match!
Summary: England is having a teatime picnic. It's long overdue. Threadjacking is okay and welcomed! Join an existing thread and make it a tea party or make a new thread.
Warnings: Probably language since it's England. Also possibly threadjacking, so just say in the subject if you don't want that!

[So there is no fancy garden table and chairs or quaint little sitting room, but the innocuous spring floor is almost as nice. He's laid out a length of cloth snatched from the workshop floor to act as a makeshift blanket, and has a teaset out, with a full pot of tea, multiple cups, and sugar. No milk or honey, due to the restrictions of the Tower's kitchen, but he can deal.

And he's actually smiling a little. Do you dare risk disrupting him in this almost fugue-like state?

Of course you do, he's just a silly grump with pretty plates and big eyebrows. Come join him for tea.]

Comments

[guiltapalooza]

[Of course, Willow has no idea that it's hypocritical of him to say that, so she just listens attentively and with the utmost sympathy.] You're right. You're so right. How did you get to be so right?

You really are a lot like Giles. Maybe he'll show up sometime, and you guys can have very restrained tea and chat about what it's like being English and secretly kick-ass. [Does she miss Giles like the burning? Ohhhh yes.]

[keepscalm]

[Oh. He colors visibly at all that -- damn the pale English complexion -- and moves to hide his face behind his cup.] I-I-- years of experience, I suppose. Though I'm unsure as to, ah-- how right and..."kick-ass" I am. [He kind of half-tries for the American accent, but it doesn't work too well. And then he gets even more embarrassed. He'd really like to stop making an idiot of himself now thanks.]

[guiltapalooza]

[Is he blushing?? And failing at an American accent? Oh my gosh it's too cute. Willow starts giggling and tries to cut herself off and hide it behind her own tea cup, but fails miserably.]

Trust me, you are definitely right and definitely kick-ass. I saw those moves when the tower got invaded; you can't pretend with me any longer.

[keepscalm]

[Oh god now she's laughing at him. His face burns briefly, and he regrets being even the slightest bit open with her for a moment, but then she reiterates her statement and he just gets flustered again.]

It's-- i-it wasn't anything special, or-- admirable or anything of the sort, really, I was just--

[wow can he just go crawl into a hole for about a century]

[guiltapalooza]

I'll stop with the compliments if they really embarrass you that much, but really, you don't have anything to be embarrassed about.

You're a nice guy and don't you forget it. [She may have met him relatively recently, but Willow feels pretty confident on this point already.]

[keepscalm]

[It takes him a moment to calm his tits and come out from behind his teacup, though he's still noticeably colored when he does.] They're not-- embarrassing, exactly, [He's more embarrassed of his reactions than the compliments...] I'm just, ah, not...

[He clears his throat and shifts.] Really accustomed to positive attention of that nature, is all. It's an adjustment. Um, thank you, at any rate. [Fact: he fails at words when they really count.]

[guiltapalooza]

[She gives him an amused, tolerant look at the continued blushing and discomfort.] Well, you should get used to it. Whatever was stopping people at home isn't going to stop anyone here-- myself included!

Unless you're secretly some murderer manipulating me for kicks, which, I can't really see. Somehow I don't think many of those do needlepoint. [Yeah, she had actually noticed the stuff on his bed the other day.]

[keepscalm]

[Guilt. And more embarrassment because oh my god she saw his embroidery but mostly intense guilt. Manipulating her, no, but a murderer...

Maybe he should tell her about the nation thing, if she's going to trust him so openly.] Bad history is most of what stops my acquaintances at home. I can't blame some of them. It's--

[How to phrase it?] ...a rather long and bloody history, at some points.

[Hopefully she'll ask, so he has an excuse to tell the truth.]

[guiltapalooza]

[Hey, she's not judging the embroidery. Whatever makes him happy. And she really hadn't meant to make him feel guilty, oops.

But she wouldn't be Willow if she passed up a chance to get to hear about a potential friend's past.] You don't have to tell me, obviously, but... what about it was so long and bloody?

[She seems a little hesitant to pry, despite her willingness to get to know him. Giles and Angel and all of those other people with major grievances in their past were reluctant and defensive about talking about it. Not that she could blame them. But it was somewhat odd to her that he'd be willing to talk about it if it was really that bad.]

[keepscalm]

[He grimaces a little. One more question.] How high is your tolerance of the strange?

[It seems pretty high, considering she didn't even blink during the monster attacks, but. He should probably ask anyways.]

[guiltapalooza]

It's gone past tolerance and straight into normal, let's just put it that way.

My best friend's little sister used to be a mystical ball of energy. Lay it on me.

[keepscalm]

...

[Sigh.]

Well, however bloody and depraved you may consider the history of England to be, it is all nonetheless mine, for better or for worse. I am England. And diplomatic representative for the United Kingdom of Great Britain and Northern Ireland as a whole, since the capital city is in my country and my brothers are unmotivated arseholes.

Though behind the veil of bureaucracy, I am but a mysterious man of great importance named Arthur Kirkland.

[He sounds almost resigned as he says all this, fully expecting to be called a lunatic. Not that such is an abnormal occurrence, whoops.]

[guiltapalooza]

[She doesn't call him a lunatic, but she does look deeply puzzled and somewhat weirded out.]

Wha-- huh? You are England?

How does being an anthropomorphic representation of an entire country, um, work? Is that typical for your world? [First things first: info gathering. Willow can't help but default to asking questions before she settles into an opinion on all of it.]

[keepscalm]

[He pulls a bit of a frown.] It's entirely typical. Though I honestly can't tell you how everything about it works. Nations aren't really given a manual. We just...appear. And then we're on our own to figure things out after that. Most available mentors aren't exactly looking to teach you the easy way, so you're better off by yourself, honestly. [He wishes he had a pound for every time he'd been conquered in his youth.]

What I do know is that we are connected to our country in every way. Our people, our land, our economics, and our politics. [He gingerly places down his cup and saucer, and then pulls up his sleeve a little to expose his wrist to Willow, and the blue trails of the veins beneath his pale skin. He traces up one of the lines.] The River Thames, for example. [He rolls his sleeve down, and then sets a hand over the right side of his chest, indicating his heart.] And London, for another. Then my spine represents the Pennine mountain range.

[England lets his hand drop. He has more examples, but frankly, the exact relation of his geography to his physical body is kind of personal, so he's not going into the more obscure places if he doesn't have to.] Just the same, nations tend to fall ill if they are facing economic crisis. Or they may face mental instability if they are in the midst of civil war.

[guiltapalooza]

[She follows the geography analogy pretty well, having spent some time in England herself, and takes it all in, frowning thoughtfully. As far as stunning revelations go, she's heard way worse.]

Wow, that's pretty funky. Not bad funky! Just... funky. I've really never heard of anything like that, and I've heard of a lot.

--Wait, if it's typical, does that mean there's an America? And an everywhere else, too?

[keepscalm]

Most of the humans in our world have never heard of anything like it either. [The implication there is that their worlds may be one in the same and Willow just isn't aware.

Of course, she's American, so it doesn't make too much of a difference to England, oops.]

Yes. Nearly every territory recognized by the UN has a personification, and many territories that aren't do, as well. Autonomous regions such as Hong Kong and Macau, for example, and even micronations such as the Principality of Wy and-- [Does his voice get a little sour? It does.] Sealand. Ancient nations from before the United Nations formed were also personified. My land was ruled by Rome for quite some time.

Some of them are even in the Tower with us. [...and the frown deepens.] America, France, and Russia I know for a fact. [though America is gone as of the actual date of this tag being written cries] I've also met a few nations from a world where we're apparently all of the opposite sex. [Imagine his surprise and despair when he found out that there were two Frances here.]

[guiltapalooza]

[Willow's frankly a little doubtful that something this major could be going on in her world and she wouldn't have heard about it, but hey, it's possible. She isn't Giles.

So she just nods along.] Now that I'm getting used to the idea, this actually sounds nifty! Doesn't that make you, like, ancient? [... Oops was that insulting? She hastens to add,] I'm just asking because, haha, still used to thinking of my history homework, and how convenient would that be?

Usually I ask Giles because he's well-educated and British and also used to be employed by the public school system, but you're like the original Brit. I bet you even like Marmite.

[keepscalm]

[Well. At least she didn't call him "old man". Like some people do.] Indeed. [He pauses to do a bit of math.] One thousand eighty-four...or eighty-five -- I can't quite recall the time of year, I was still very young -- since my first formal unification in 927 AD. Though I have been in this world for longer than that still. [Realizing this may be confusing, England quickly goes to explain.] The personification often comes about before the nation officially does.

For example, I was not present when America appeared. He was already a child by the time I found him. [There's something a bit distant in his voice, that grows farther away as the statement goes on. He comes back to himself as rapidly as he got lost, however.] With that in mind, I couldn't tell you my actual age, in all honesty. I had other things to worry about besides counting down with the calendar. [Not to mention that some of those memories, with the muddling of records, have become foggy, as well.

Teal-deer aside, England clears his throat and briefly averts his eyes, almost pouting.] Any potential enjoyment of Marmite on my part is completely coincidental. [No it's not. But geez, did they have to bring his taste in food into this?]

[guiltapalooza]

[She listens to this attentively, interested in the history and enthused about it.] Man, anyone I've met before that was that old pretty much just wanted my guts for garters. More of the demon-y persuasion. This is nifty!

I'm glad you told me. [She gives him a wide smile, flattered that he'd trust her with it.] I'll refrain from the mocking about food, I promise, just still kinda getting used to the whole idea so the jokes slip out.

[keepscalm]

Ah, so you've encountered those nasty buggers too? Absolute menaces, some of them are. [spoilers Willow he also sees magical creatures. But apparently she does too, so.]

Admittedly I'm glad to be doing the telling. It's a little tiring masquerading as a human. [Not that he really does so intentionally, but it just seems like so much more work to explain the alternative.] Don't know how you lot manage it sometimes.

[...and then he grimaces.] As for the jokes, it's not as if I'm not used to them. [You can rib him, Willow. He'll eventually be comfortable enough to rib back!]

[guiltapalooza]

[Doesn't everyone see magical creatures? Why wouldn't he?] I've encountered lots of those nasty buggers. My town was built on top of a portal to hell. [She says this very matter-of-factly.]

I think we manage it because it isn't a masquerade, [she says with a slight grin.] But yeah, keeping stuff like that to yourself is tiresome. I'm pretty awful with secrets.

[She's probably going to tease him anyway, but maybe a little more gently until he gets used to it.] Yeah, but a thousand years of used to them probably makes them the stalest of stale.

[keepscalm]

I'd wager that'd make it a real estate agent's worst nightmare. [He'd get pretty tired of demons coming in uninvited if he were Willow.]

It's still not easy, even if it's what you're used to. [He glares contemplatively into his tea.] Or such is my understanding. Can't say for sure, of course, since I've never been human.

Though at least it's given me more time to refine my sense of humour. [He's asking to be made fun of, to be honest.]