004 | ❝I pretend everything's alright...❞

[pitiedthefool]

Characters: Yu and anyone else who is interested in group therapy...
Setting: Dorm 2-2 →Floor 14 → Floor 22 → Everywhere but the music floor for more than PMMM reasons.
Format: Any is fine; I'll follow your lead
Summary: Just a protagonist, seeking his social links...
Warning: Do I even have to warn about SMT shenanigans and them equating to suffering?

Reality and nightmare had begun to blend together at the end of his "punishment" where he had no idea which part had been the truth for a brief moment. Lying there, face down... feeling the static spread as the blood dripped down. He wants to flinch, but even then... he couldn't do that as he lay there, paralyzed for what seemed like an eternity that blended in with the nightmare of being completely alone and utterly helpless to-

The first thing he noticed when he could move was that his face and pillows were soaked in silent tears. It isn't long after that that, unless stopped, he shakily makes his way to the showers in an attempt to calm down...

Floor 14
The first place he even thought about going was the media floor again, knowing with little doubt that he would more than likely run into one of the friends he'd been looking for. Just... any familiar face right now would be a relief to him.

He sat back on a couch, deciding to play a video game for a while. Though just by glancing either at him or the screen, it's obvious his heart wasn't in it.

Floor 22
Yu soon retreats, however- back upstairs to a floor he'd been avoiding ever since their collars had been tampered with not long after he'd awakened here. At first it had been because of what he could remember happening here, but then he learned what had happened when he lost control himself. Realized that he'd been running scared of what could be triggered if he returned here.

Not anymore, though right now he needed the silence. Not so many people visited the gallery with whatever it could show of their fears, and hadn't he just been forced to live through his own-?

He decided to pointedly look away from the image of his world covered in the fog, even as a silent tear fell. Even though he knew at least a few were still here, the crushing despair and emptiness of that experience...

"Damn." How could he ever forgive himself for falling for such an obvious example of false imagery?

Floor 25
This meadow... it almost reminded him of the last time he saw the TV world...

But it and the other floors aren't the only ones he visited, searching for any familiar faces to make sure they're alright, even at the expense of himself. Despite Izanagi's calm presence and reassurance, he needed to see them for himself.

Comments

[mutab1e]

It seemed as if the third repetition of something to that effect was finally enough to convince Equius to regain his stature... or at least try. Regardless, as Yu took a moment to calm himself, so did he, and after straightening his posture again and brushing nonexistent dirt off his sleeve, Equius looked... somewhat better. At least he could attempt to conduct a conversation in this state.

...Unfortunately, the only thing he could think of to say was, "I'm sorry." Again.

[pitiedthefool]

...So close, but so very far away. Yu resisted the urge to bring a hand to his forehead, but only just as the apology was mentioned again. There had once been a reason he emotionally distanced himself from others (a reason he'd been reminded of this past week). Yet now that they were all back, he realized what his actions had caused, and just how much he relied on others. Not just for power, like Igor had once claimed his Wild Card abilities required, but that he couldn't exist separated from them. That didn't even begin to cover his aversion toward death.

"You wanted to play a game on that console, didn't you?" he asked, deciding it would be best to change the topic for now. "Go ahead; I can't concentrate on it, anyway."

[mutab1e]

Equius nodded quietly, slipping past Yu to check what was in the console; it made no difference to him as long as it was boring and required no extended periods of thought, but he was extremely aware of the other's attention on him, and it wouldn't look good at all to just leave it there after all of the mess he caused. ...Though, he was pretty sure there was no way he could redeem himself in Yu's eyes. He'd killed one of his friends in a fit of terror, run away when Yu got some punches in, and now he nearly flipped out again when they had just happened to meet in the same room. Vacantly, he wondered how he somehow managed to kill (or at least worsen) every problem he touched.

Mostly on autopilot, he picked something especially stupid and threw it in -- though not before hunting around the entire room for the other game's box, and mumbling a bit about how honestly someone needs to clean up every once in a while.

[pitiedthefool]

Whether there was a way to redeem himself or not has yet to be seen. After all, he'd attacked too out of blind rage and nearly paid another, more steep price in doing so. One he wouldn't say to anyone though someone probably sensed the change even just in watching. As for the game box? ...It was in Yu's hand all along. Honestly, what do you think he'd been doing after someone else had moved it--just watching like a creeper? No, that wasn't like him at all. Deal with it, he's a neat freak.

Yu settled into the corner, listening to music instead. Tracks from home were rather calming regardless, especially when it was a familiar voice...

[mutab1e]

Woohoo, neat freak buddies.

He took the box from Yu with thanks that were only slightly more than mumbled, and spent a fair amount of time just cleaning up instead of turning on the game like he had intended. Mundane chores like these were his go-to form of therapy whenever things got too hot to handle, which was often; these were the 'mundane distractions' he favored so much. Every time he tried to do something different in this godforsaken tower, it always metamorphosed into cleaning, cooking, or fixing something in the given room.

Without looking up, he asked, "Where can I find him?" Only after a few moments of silence did he look up and realize that Yu had put on a pair of headphones while he wasn't looking. ...Hoping that Yu hadn't heard, he just went back to sorting everything out.

[pitiedthefool]

He kept things clean until the point in which he was so lost in his inner turmoil that he just didn't care anymore. That had only happened once, and he swore to never let one of his friends or enemies see him like that again. Especially after what's happened so far. Yu nodded in response to the murmured thanks, picking up a few things here and there. One would think that those who frequented the floor would at least keep it remotely organized so others could find what they're looking for, but apparently not.

Though when he began listening to music in doing so, he barely overheard the kid's question. It took him a little while to even say it, but... judging from the continual apologies? The troll was probably more concerned with apologizing.

"...I know his room's on the second dorm floor. Other than that, where he likes to go depends." He doesn't really know Ventus that well--either one of them, actually--so it was a safe guess to say that much at least.