towerofanimus | [OPEN] I don't wake up early every morning

Entry tags:

[OPEN] I don't wake up early every morning

Characters: [AU1] Eridan Ampora & you!
Setting: Media floor.
Format: I'll start with Action, but I'll match your preference.
Summary: Eridan is taking this whole swapped body really well. Or maybe he's too exhausted to make much a fuss about it. Either or.
Warnings: ...fabulous jadebloods in fabulous skirts?

[Eridan took the whole thing in stride. He couldn't really tell if it was aplomb or just flat out not giving a shit, though. He changed the shirt, put on his spare sunglasses and when he found his pants just wouldn't stay on his new hips, shrugged it off and kept the skirt. It was kinda comfy anyway. So after dropping a line in the network, he made his way to the media room, intent on watching movies until Kanaya saw his message and swung by to talk to him.

Well, that was the idea. Not even halfway through the first one, Eridan fell asleep. So now there's a jadeblood sprawled on a couch, in a very unladylike fashion, wearing an aquarius shirt and a pair of ridiculous sunglasses.

Might be snoring a little, too.]

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

Kinda made it worse anyway, didn't I.

[It's not a question and he doesn't even pretend to make it one. Eridan rests his chin on his knees, offering a very thin smile. Kanaya's lips are fuller than his, and her fangs make the expression a touch more wry than it has any business being.]

It was going to get worse anyway.

[Considering, well. Tower. He's still looking at the ground.]

Over the long run, I think, you actually... [Urk. Not now, kokoro.] ...you helped. A... lot.

That might've been a first.

[He shrugs again, looking away.]

I'm glad, though. I didn't want you to get hurt.

Right.

[And now for fidgeting. Oh god, so much fidgeting.]

I... thanks.

For looking out for me.

[Shaaaaaaame.]

It's--

[my job, he didn't say, shrinking a bit more into the couch, effectively folding himself into a tiny singularity of nonexistence.]

--nothing. The least I could do, really.

[Shut up, Eridan. Quit while you're ahead.]

Since... since you put up with me so much.

I don't put up with you--

[--WAIT. That came out wrong.]

I-I mean... wait... dammit.

I don't mind you. It's not 'putting up' with you at all. Really.

Equius.

[Eridan gave him a tired smile, voice darkly amused.]

Honestly, I barely put up with myself most days, it's okay. I'm sorry. About... I'm sorry about a lot of things.

[He still doesn't believe him.]

I'm not lying to you... I mean it...

[He doesn't sound very sure of himself, though. Because obviously, if Eridan says something, it must be true!]

[And now Eridan looks properly chastised, as he flinched sharply when Equius said lying.]

...I didn't mean to imply you're a liar, I'm sorry.

[He shrinks a little more.]

I'm just... I'm just gonna shut up now, okay.

I-if you want.

[After all, who was he to tell Eridan to keep talking?]

...And, uh.

You're forgiven.

[Eridan made a soft noise, higher pitched in Kanaya's throat than his own, but the same sort of self-deprecating tone as usual.]

...thank you.

[Augh, ouch. Eridan. Please stop using that tone. It hurts his soul in ways that ~~he doesn't want to~~ are really uncomfortable to think about.]

You're welcome.

[And then he sits down on one of the nearby chairs, covered by fabric of a very unattractive color that's actually not too far off from his blood, and curls up in it.]

Edited 2012-09-21 02:28 (UTC)

[So this is gonna be the sitting quietly and staring at nothing in particular moment, huh? Okay, Eridan is a pro at this. Just watch... or don't, really, it's okay.

But if Equius doesn't say anything soon, Eridan might fall asleep again. Because he's really that tired, man, honest.]

[Fuck. Shit. Fuck.]

[He wished he could have held this conversation over the Network or something, just so he didn't have to... say it... out loud. But he couldn't do that because the Network was sorta kinda useless right now, and after the incident with Karkat and the conversation he wasn't eager to use it anytime soon.]

[But the alternative is actually saying it. And he really, really doesn't want to do that.]

A-about, the, uh... thing. The. Quadrant thing.

[He casually buried his head into the plush of the chair. He didn't care that it muffled the words; if he was lucky, maybe Eridan might not even hear!]

[At first, it seems that Equius prayers were heard, because Eridan doesn't quite react. In truth, he sits there and feels the most powerful urge to run away. He lets out a very soft breath, and when he finally speaks, his voice is tiny and shaky and hesitant.]

...yeah?

[Don't do this to him, don't acknowledge his feelings. He can ignore his feelings if you acknowledge them. He can get over them. Move on. He's so good at moving on, don't make it harder by acknowledging them. Don't make him have to sit through a rejection, he's not sure he can handle that.]

[Immediately, the question he wants to ask is "why". Why did Eridan have to have that? Why did he have to have it for him? All very good questions, certainly, but he knew that there was no way Eridan could answer them. Maybe, he'd figured a while ago, there was just no way to choose these things.]

You're... serious about that, right?

[Eridan lets out a soft, choked laugh, running a nervous hand through his hair.]

Yeah.

[His voice sounds a little hoarse. Oh god, Equius, don't do this to him.]

Yeah, I do.

Okay.

[There really wasn't any point to that word, it was just to force himself to breathe again; along with it came a monumental sigh, and a sudden burning feeling in the pit of his stomach.]

[Suddenly unsure of this whole idea (because it's a really stupid idea and he shouldn't even be doing it), Equius looks up a bit, staring at Eridan over the top rim of his glasses. That definitely isn't a vice grip on the couch he has going there.]

...Can we try it?

[Eridan dug his claws into his legs at that first word, flinching a little and trying to hide it. But this wasn't his body and he wasn't really aware of all the little tells about it. Clearly, he was bracing himself for something, but what actually came out of Equius mouth was not what he was expecting.]

...what?

[Ladies and gentlemen, I present to you...]

[

]

[...Reasons.]

[Sorry, Ampora, he's not going to say it again.]

[...I had a feeling I was going to be hoisted by my own petard.

Eridan takes one look at Equius expression and shrinks to levels hitherto thought impossible.]

I.

[No. The answer is no. The answer should always be no. Even... even if this is really what it seems, and Equius is not as cruel to make a joke out of it... of course he's not as cruel to make a joke out of it, Ampora, stop thinking mean things, you asshole. But. The answer should be no. That's only gonna end with Equius hurt. Equius doesn't deserve that, no one deserves that, and he can't be that selfish, can he? He's not allowed. He shouldn't.]

...I'd. Like that.

[Good Fi. Smart Fi.]

[Still, he doesn't take himself out of the pathetic little curled position he'd taken up, not at all — as a matter of fact, he's probably gone deeper into it, a futile attempt to nuke all feedback into his brain so that maybe it'll just stop working and he can forget about what just happened.]

[It dawns on him now how great it would be if this conversation just stopped happening, because all of a sudden he's entertaining several thoughts which have not held purchase in his mind for several months, which is — now that he thinks about it — frankly terrifying. How could he have let himself go this much? Was there no scrap of dignity left in him at all? Obviously there wasn't, considering what he'd just said to — to — to a jadeblood...]

[And suddenly, all the guilt and hatred that had not been around for the past couple of months weighed down on him at once, and his voice did not sound strangled for the reasons that Eridan might expect.]

...yeah.

[I do try!

Equius curled up like that always, always does funny things to Eridan's heart. And by funny, we mean painful. He slowly uncurls himself, hands shaking a little as he goes. It's only a few steps from where he's standing to where Equius is sitting, but it feels like it takes him forever to get there. And then he just stands there for a moment, awkward and unsure, stuck in a body not his own and thus emoting way more than he thinks he is. He swallows hard.]

...can I hug you?

[As soon as the couch creaks from Eridan shifting his weight on it, Equius looks up again, appearing far more similar to a small scared animal than he really should after establishing a matespritship. (A matespritship which they're probably not going to even call a matespritship for the next three months. Take that, Karkat!) Only when Eridan asks permission to hug him — well that was considerate — does he really go back to a normal reclining position. And then a sitting position. And then a standing position. And then a that-sure-is-a-pair-of-scrawny-yellowblood-arms-wrapped-around-Eridanaya position.]

[Whoops.]

[It's okay, Eridan's just going to cling to him now. Is that okay? Can we do without the words? Are we done with words here? Because it sure feels like we don't need words now. He just wants a hug and maybe to cling a little because what the fuck did just happen here.]

;__;

8A8

J_J

what even is that emote

L__L the opposite of this.

oh well that clears up so much

there's this too g__g

>_<

^_~

^_^

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I promised myself I'd finish this tag before midnight. It's now 11:57.

Well done! It's 11:58 here.

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