towerofanimus | ITP: Meandering

Entry tags:

ITP: Meandering

Characters: Arturia Pendragon [AU5] and anyone
Setting: Dorms, Floor One, Floor Twenty-~~three~~four, and Floor Thirty-eight.
Format: Prose
Summary: Arturia wakes up in the tower after what must be countless centuries of forced combat.... and has no idea what to do with herself!
Warnings: DEATH! WOOHOO! In the first post, too! \o/

[Room 03-17]
It was with a jolt and a gasp that she finally sat up, hand going to her neck only to find the collar there but all the same she could move. She could move. She could breathe.

"W-what?"

She could speak.

What was this place? Yet another battlefield in which she'd be made to slaughter guilty and innocent alike endlessly, an angel of death garbed in blood-stained white for all to see? It made no sense to her. None whatsoever. She glanced around the room for any sign of what she was meant to do but only found other beds like the one she laid on and a trunk much like the one at the foot of her bed. Her eyes finally fell on the notes and she snatched them up, reading them thoroughly, her heart squeezing with every moment.

The world was.... gone? She was free? Free from her punishment?

Arturia had no idea how to feel about this. On the one hand even she could be grateful of the reprieve, but on the other hand it had been at the cost of who knows how many lives? And what if the world itself was still in tact? Would she go right back to fighting endlessly as soon as she returned? Questions. So many questions she didn't understand, but she balled up her notes and placed them in the trashcan. With barely a thought she summoned what was now her normal attire, sans the collar. Apparently the collar placed on her here superseded it. No matter. It wasn't like she was really attached to anything beyond her sword at this point.

And so Arturia headed out of her dorm, wanting to know just where she'd wound up and where to go from here.

[Floor One]
If there was one indulgence she would allow herself, it was food. Naturally when she'd read she'd have to eat some oatmeal before she could eat anything else she'd been fine with it.

There wasn't much of a spread in the cafeteria, simply eggs for breakfast, and once she was done with her oatmeal she tore into them like a hyena. It wasn't very kingly or knightly or even as lady-like as her appearance would suggest, but it was something. They were not the best made nor would it have been memorable otherwise--but it was food! Real food! And a delicious smell beyond the smell of blood and steal she never knew she'd grow tired of.

Part of her mind went back to those meals in Fuyuki, how warm the house had been, how Shirou had insisted she eat at the table with everyone else despite her and Rin's protests.

How delicious the meals had been, cooked with a care and pride not common in her time. Arturia found her appetite gone, the food tasting like ash, but not wanting to waste it, she forced herself to finish, though she no longer looks happy about it.

[Floor Twenty-Two to Floor Twenty-Four]

Wait, had she lost count of the floors? Arturia thought back for a moment. Twenty, twenty-one, twenty-two, she could have sworn she just went past the twenty-third floor to explore, so why could she not remember it. She turned on the stairs to check again. She needed to be thorough in creating a mental map of this place and the dangers it could present.

Except she bypassed it again! What was wrong with her? Had she been controlled for so long her senses were completely dull?! With a frustrated sigh she turned again to go up the stairs--

--and again she missed the floor entirely! And again! Again again again she kept missing it. This tower would not make a fool of her! She turned yet again, this time counting the number of stairs to make sure she didn't miss the floor, a determined look on her face, and unaware of how her body was slowly becoming vaguely transparent time she passed the twenty-third floor.

[Floor Thirty-Eight]
Her body didn't ache after climbing so many stairs like a normal person would, but Arturia knew there was only so much time in the day. The elevator would be a few flights up and then she could see about returning to her dorm to become further acquainted with her roommates. But for now this room seemed as good enough place as any to rest and gather her thoughts.

The elation of being able to move freely, to speak freely, to make her own choices was starting to lose its novelty. Arturia sank into a bean bag chair, for once in her now-long life not caring how dignified she looked in doing so. If the world had, indeed, ended and she had, somehow, been saved, it left one question on her mind that she couldn't hold back any longer. For so long everything had been clear before her, her path marked with a vivid certainty she could not take her eyes from.

Only now it was gone. Gone not just in the world itself being gone, but her Kingdom, her friends, every last person had been lost to her by coming here; destroyed by her own hand. For so long she had believed there was no escaping her fate, her punishment, and now here she was, completely and utterly alone and lost.

"What do I do now?" she asked aloud both for the novelty and because some part of her mind was beginning to settle into a sort of malaise of "who cares"?

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"I don't know. I don't know what you left behind. I don't have very much to go back to either. But I still want to go back." He had a few more days of life remaining, and he'd win the Grail. That was all. "That's where I should be."

It was hard for him to answer her questions, not knowing her situation. He wasn't good at this kind of philosophical discussion, so he replied simply. "I don't think you save people because they'll make a difference." After all, it didn't matter to him what Sakura did, but only who she was. "You save them because they need to be saved."

"You remind me of someone I once knew," she said, studying his face, the veins and pale here, "He would say such things all the time. I thought he was foolish at the time."

Kariya remained in his seat, sitting still. He thought about what she'd said. He'd never heard his family say anything good about him: he was the weakling, the fool. They didn't think he could win. Maybe no one had ever thought he could succeed. "I've heard that before. That I'm foolish. Maybe I am. But that won't stop me from doing what I have to do."

This Saber was definitely different than the others. He was especially glad she was unlike the one with the golden eyes. "If I remind you of someone, I hope it's a good reminder."

"It is. Do not worry. Even if I thought he was foolish, I was rather fond of him. It was refreshing to meet someone who hadn't yet been jaded by the world." As she knew she herself had become, as Shirou's father had been when she'd been his Servant.

Some part of her wondered if, with her existence negated, Kiritsugu would have been able to see the Fourth Grail War through properly, if the fire could have been avoided and Shirou not caught in the flames. Would Shirou have had a happy life?

Arturia pushed the thought aside and reached back, tugging at one of the loose ends of her ribbon. A nervous habit she had even when she had it in a bun and didn't quite know what to do with her hands.

"I apologize. This is a rather personal conversation and rather awkward as I do not know what to introduce myself to you as."

"I'm glad, then." Kariya had to laugh at that, a little, a slight bitterness in the sound. "I don't know if I haven't been jaded. I just believe in saving people who need it. That's all." Growing up in his family home, he'd seen too much not to become at least a little jaded. He just wanted to be as unlike the rest of his family as possible.

When Saber pulled at her ribbon, he thought of Sakura and felt a twinge. Where was she now? What was she doing?

"You don't have to apologize. You can use any name you want. Whatever one you like best. I'm Kariya." He paused before adding, "Matou," not sure if she'd recognize the name and wondering if he was being foolish to offer it in the first place, but he was curious, considering that so far, one Saber had tried to kill him and the other had had no idea who he was. This Saber didn't seem likely to try to kill him, but hopefully Ruler would save him if he'd miscalculated.

"Ah. You might be related to Sakura then, if I'm not mistaken," she said gently. The way he hesitated in admitting told her he meant no harm. If she remembered correctly, the Matou family had little-to-no magic left if what Shinji had said was true.

"I met her once. A long time ago. A version of her, at least. I thought she was a nice girl. She had a lovely smile and a strong spirit. She was a good friend of the boy you remind me of."

That was a relief. Saber had seemed friendly enough, but it could be hard to tell, where Servants were concerned. He smiled at the mention of Sakura. "Yes, I am. I'm her uncle. She is, she's a very sweet, brave girl. I met someone else here who said she was a friend of hers." He let out a breath like a sigh. "I'm glad she has good friends."

"I see. I apologize, but I don't remember seeing you around at the time. Did you live outside of Fuyuki City?"

AKA: Where had he been when Shinji had run around with a Servant? And she dearly wanted to ask what was wrong with his face but manners kept her from mentioning it.

The Matou family was from a long line of magi, after all. Weak they had been when Shinji had been a master, yes, but wouldn't some adult close to the family have noticed the boy running around as he had been?

"No, don't apologize." He'd learned something about the other Grail War from Rin, and indirectly from the Saber with golden eyes. "I didn't live anywhere. I'd died by then." He tried to say it lightly, but it didn't exactly work. It was odd to talk about himself in the past tense.

Even if he was still (mostly) convinced that he was going to win the Grail War in his reality, he knew he was going to die regardless. He'd had more than a year to accustom himself to that fact, and Zouken had never tired of reminding him of it. "I won't survive much longer, back home."

"I see. Then you must see this place as an extension of some sort." It definitely explained the lines on his face. Arturia hadn't experienced the Crest Worms up close in her timeline and had never met Kariya personally as far as she knew. but she saw enough of his face right now to know that Kariya was in no way healthy.

Still, she could not bring herself to apologize to him for knowing he would die soon. If he could speak about it so casually then she knew he had long ago accepted it. Her pity would be a disservice to him.

A shame, too. Why did all the noble idiots seem to be the ones who died the most horribly?

"Then you would be happy to know Sakura was happy when I knew her. Happy and safe and had a strong will in her own way." It was the best she could do, since he seemed to be comforted by knowing Sakura was well.

"She's a very good cook, as well."

"It is like that. An extension." He hadn't really thought of it like that before, but he had to admit it was true. He'd already had so much life here that he wouldn't have had otherwise. He'd met so many people. "But I want to return as soon as I can. I have to finish what I started. For Sakura's sake." Even if it means he'll die in short order.

Her words do much to please and ease him. "That does make me happy. That's all I want for her." Hearing that makes him happier than just about anything else would, with the obvious exception of attending a reunion between Rin, Sakura, and Aoi.

"I remember she was a good cook even as a child. She likes to help her mother in the kitchen. She baked me some cookies once. They were better than anything I could have made."

She gave him a confused look. For Sakura's sake? That only made the sinking feeling in her stomach worse. With how caring this man was behaving and how he spoke of Sakura, she could only think of one thing. On thing that might have been a failure she overlooked in her time with Shirou:

"Is she in trouble?"

He nodded, unable to answer the question with words, at first. He didn't like to speak of it. The particulars of what had happened, was still happening to Sakura. No one knew better than he did what it was like, as he'd spent many days and nights in Zouken's worm room. And it wasn't just that. His family was... reprehensible.

"That's why I'm fighting in the War. So she can go home and be free." So she didn't have to be a Matou anymore.

Edited 2013-01-20 03:51 (UTC)

The look on Arturia's face could best be described as one muted anger that, the more she heard of Sakura's plight morphed into horror and outrage. Sakura had been a kind girl. Arturia had no idea the girl had been Rin's sister, no idea of the plight she'd gone through. As far as she had known, Sakura had been of Matou blood through and through and had no magic like Shinji did.

Oh, Arturia had heard of the Makiri magic from Irisviel, that they utilized insects in their craft, but looking at Kariya's face and thinking of the smile on Sakura's face, how kind she'd been.

Arturia suddenly had new respect for the girl. She looked Kariya dead in the eye, barely managing to keep from completely exploding at the atrocity someone she considered a friend had gone through. Even moreso: how had she not noticed what Sakura was going through? Was it different in her timeline?

It didn't matter. All that matter was the fact someone she considered a friend and a friend of someone she might have loved was in trouble.

"If I ever see your father here, Kariya, rest assured I will not hesitate to cut him in two with my blade."

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ITP: Meandering

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