towerofanimus | [OPEN] I guess that I don't need that though

Characters: [AU1] Eridan Ampora and OPEN!
Setting: Workshop.
Format: Starting with Action, but I'll match you.
Summary: Nearly fifty years later and Eridan still sucks at this sewing thing.
Warnings: Heavy handed sexual innuendo, attempts to make your characters uncomfortable, lewd bad jokes, Eridan being as trigger-happy with that gun as ever. Also Eridan being the troll-equivalent of a vampire, so expect him to glow if startled and shamelessly ask if he can bite your characters.

[There's a jadeblood sitting on a workbench, struggling with thread, needle and a really long, red coat. He's grumbling at it, squinting between each stitch and occasionally growling ferally at it. Sunglasses stuck on his hair, which is still black and green, Eridan seems to be slightly absorbed with his task. The short sleeve tshirt he's wearing is not very well suited for the cold, at least not without his coat, but he doesn't seem to mind. He's no longer wearing his sign on it, as it's just plain black with a small detail in yellow lines near the hem. His sign is now on his pants, black as well, stitched in jade along the lower part of his right leg. Shame the whole thing is dirty and slightly stained by blood and things you probably don't want to know the origin of. Rifle is, as always, resting by his side, an easy snatch away.]

Every fuckin' time, I swear...

[He shakes the whole thing in frustration, as he's once again, stabbed the underside of a claw with that needle. You'd think he'd be better at this, given how long he's been here. But nope. Some things just never change.]

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

He's fine! Everyone's bloody well fine, what do you want me to say? He didn't lose a limb or die or anything!

[ tapping a foot. he's waiting for a better explanation than that. ]

Nothing happened! Honest, I just pissed him off, fooling around.

[Eridan shrugs.]

But if I bite you I will piss him off again and then someone will die and everyone's gonna be pissed for a week. So. You're right, fine. I'll have to go without delicious candy red this morning.

I'M NOT DELICIOUS!

...you kind of are, though.

...That is so fucking creepy.

What, why? It's just an innocent compliment, jeez.

I feel like you're going to come after me with a needle and a blood bag. Hello... I'm not Hawaiian Punch!

Pft, that'd be rude.

[Eridan gives Karkat an almost demure look.]

I always ask first.

Because asking makes all the difference.

Well, yes.

[Eridan arches an eyebrow.]

's the difference between friend and buffet?

...Oh yeah. Real comforting there.

Ain't lot to say about comforting when it comes to bein' undead, hon. Sorry.

[He doesn't sound sorry at all.]

See... That part doesn't bother me so much. It's when you tell me that I'm fucking delicious like some rare delicacy that gets me a little concerned.

Well, you are?

[Eridan smiles innocently.]

I just don't lie to my friends, hon.

[This is a hideous, preposterous lie, by the way. Eridan lies to everyone.]

[ and Karkat knows this, fixing Eridan a flat look. ]

Enjoy sucking someone else.

[S h a m e l e s s]

I'll let Equius know you send your regards.

[Yeah, he went there.]

You're fucking sick.

You say that like it's a bad thing or something.

[Leering.]

There are days where I wonder why I even bothered to actively seek this friendship out.

Because someone had to schoolfeed you in proper cinema at some point, d'uh.

[ kind of this look, man. like he can concede that some of it is pretty all right. better than what he had originally thought. ]

Proper? Half of that shit belongs in skeevy areas where you have to park in the back to avoid being seen lest your reputation suffers from it.

[Eridan laughs.]

You make it sound like I'm making you watch porn, darling.

[LEERING]

Is that a hint?

And you're trying to tell me that you don't? Pretty sure that you've snuck some in once or twice.

[ probably more than that but... ]

...bad porn is the best comedy and you will not convince me otherwise.

[Huff.]

(no subject)

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