Against the brain's better judgment...

[warriorscribe]

Characters: Enoch and anyone (except for one where it's closed to Lucifel and maybe his roommates too)
Setting: Outside room 1-12(closed to Lucifel and maybe his roommates), Floor 2, various
Format: I'm starting in prose but I'll match!
Summary: Enoch has something to give his guardian, and then it's time for his collar checkup. And he'd been promised to have memories returned to him re: his little hiatus trip.
Warnings: Repressed memories are repressed for a reason. Maybe mentions of death, trauma, mention of suicide attempt

Dorm Floor 1

Enoch had returned here after a visit to the mail room, where he'd found two boxes of chocolate, one of them for Lucifel. Tohko sure did take easily to people...he supposed he should be glad for that much, the last thing he wanted was tension between his friends. He stopped outside the room with Lucifel's name on its plate and knocked on the door, hoping Lucifel had slept late too. He'd been either nearly missing or completely missing breakfast, himself, ever since going to Meridian...

...oh, that reminded him, he'd have to go to the infirmary for his collar checkup after this.


Infirmary

The drones had to push him out of the room. Enoch wandered back out into the waiting room, his arms folded tightly. He shook as he picked through the now perfectly clear memories. Of waking beside a corpse. Of wandering under a vileness-red sky, and burying Asato, burying Sissel, burying Ashraf and Michael, and his collapse thereafter, his empty plea to the second level, burying Armaros in the sea(and trying and failing to join him), and the moment it really dawned on him - he was utterly alone. Isolated.

He made his shaky way back to the stairs, nearly running into things and people on his way there. He didn't know where he was going, but he couldn't stand still.

Anywhere else

The tower was much larger now, but Enoch was making his aimless way up the stairs anyway. Not even his usual resting floors, the eleventh and twenty fifth, were stops. He kept his head down, his face tear-stained.

He had forgotten them for a reason. It was intensely painful, recalling those moments of discovering corpses that should not be, interring an immortal's corpse in the sea. They, especially Armaros, they were never meant to leave him, Meridian was supposed to be safe, he had been trying to keep it so. And that soul-rending pain of being utterly isolated, having no one, mortal or otherwise...

...But he had wanted to remember for a reason, hadn't he? He paused where he was on the stairs to the eighteenth floor and looked out at the tables as if he'd never seen them before. So what was important about it that he'd forgotten?

He continued to climb and reflect. And, naturally, not watch where he was going.

Comments

[godheals]

Raphael didn't have any trouble keeping pace with Enoch. He may not have been a fighter, but that didn't mean he was weak.

"..What had you forgotten? Or do you still not know?"

[warriorscribe]

"I...I had forgotten so much of it, I don't...it's so painful to think about...I don't know what was important..."

Raphael wouldn't have to move too quickly considering Enoch kept stumbling over the steps or pausing so he didn't do so.

[godheals]

When Enoch stumbled, Raphael tried to help so that the man wouldn't fall.

"Enoch..if it is painful to think about, then calm down and do not think about it right now. It..may be best to wait for awhile until you are calmer to deal with this."

[warriorscribe]

"And if I forget again?" He needed to think through it. He needed to figure out what was important before he pushed it away again...

...if he could push it away. He never asked if Jason would make it impossible to forget...

[godheals]

"I do not think you will..but if you are afraid of forgetting it again, perhaps you could write it down for the future."

[warriorscribe]

Writing it down... Just trying to gather his thoughts like he was trying to write it was painful...

...But he had to explore it somehow. He had to know what it was that was so important, otherwise this pain would be worth nothing...

[godheals]

While Enoch said nothing, it looked like he was still in quite a bit of pain. Raphael thought for a moment.

...To write about something, you would have to recall everything that had happened and try to make sense of it. If Enoch couldn't think about what he had seen well enough to tell him much of it, how could he expect Enoch to write about it for later?

It was a good idea..but..perhaps it would take some time for Enoch to calm down enough to write of it. Not quite sure what else to say, Raphael put a hand on his friend's shoulder.

Back when they had first reunited, a hug seemed to have helped him..maybe bodily contact like this would sooth him, even now.

[warriorscribe]

Enoch raised his hand to cover Raphael's.

"You're right...I must tell the story to understand it..."

[godheals]

..It was good that his idea seemed to work.

"..You do not have to tell it to anyone, if you wish. But it is like recording things in Heaven. Writing them down for the future may help you understand it later, even if you do not look at it for awhile."

[warriorscribe]

But that brought it back to the fact that he was not mentally coherent enough to write. He did remember what a mess he'd made of the one Meridian entry where he did not stop to try to gather his thoughts and just wrote in a panic after all.

Enoch just sighed and walked with Raphael's hand on his shoulder for as long as the angel would keep it there. He did have to gather his thoughts. Somehow.

[godheals]

Sadly, Raphael did not know of that time, and nor did he have much previous experience to help Enoch deal with this.

But..he would try.

Raphael kept walking alongside Enoch and kept his hand on Enoch's shoulder. He wasn't much of a talker in these situations..but if Enoch had something to say, needed to talk..he would be here.

[warriorscribe]

"Everything was exactly as I'd left it..." Enoch's voice was quiet, distracted.

[godheals]

"..Exactly? Even though the world was destroyed?"

[warriorscribe]

"It was aged...but nothing was out of place." Enoch paused on the twentieth floor, shivering out of cold now as he stepped off the staircase to watch the snow gather on the edges of the floor where the wind swept it in. He wasn't wearing his cloak today. But Enoch seemed to want to watch the snow for now as he talked.

"I...fell asleep in my cloak, f-for warmth, and with my sandals on. I had no c-cloak in Meridian, and m-my sandals were on th-the floor...where I n-normally..."

...He took a step back, closer to Raphael. It was a degree below zero at the time, and even in this state, he recognized it was probably better to leave for his own safety.

[godheals]

"Nothing moved due to erosion and time.."

Raphael noticed that his friend was shivering and sighed. He could heal injuries-which included frostbite-but he couldn't heal or stop Enoch from feeling chilly.

"Enoch..it is nice to know that Meridian was warmer..but it is gone now. Let us go and warm up..and calm down."

That last part was directed more at Enoch than Raphael.

[warriorscribe]

Enoch would go wherever Raphael led him.

"Nor did I. Armaros's....Armaros...he would've been...disturbed."

[godheals]

Raphael forced himself to not sigh and started moving his friend out of the room and onto the stairs, directing him by his shoulder.

"Isn't it odd then, that neither of you were?"

..Where was Raphael going with this? If one didn't know better, one would say he had been hanging out with Michael way too long.

[warriorscribe]

"Exactly...that's exactly..."

Hopefully he was going the same way Enoch was going.

[godheals]

He was, thankfully. Normally, he would just head back to the infirmary, but there was no way he was going to leave Enoch alone in this state.

"That's exactly..?"

[warriorscribe]

With the subject matter - Enoch was obviously walking the same way as Raphael considering he was letting the Archangel lead him.

Though he seems to have come to a halt on the stairs, staring straight ahead in the realization he was piecing together. That's exactly it, what was so important he'd suffer this.

"...My body did not move."

[godheals]

And the Archangel was leading him downstairs, to where it was warmer. He was still keeping on the steps though. Normally, he would go to the infirmary, but considering that's where Enoch just left, that might not be the best idea.

At least..he was leading him until Enoch stopped.

"Your soul did. It is as I first suspected then-our souls were what was pulled to this world."

[warriorscribe]

"Yes...these bodies are man-made."

Despite the gravity of the realization...Enoch just seems tired, letting his scrutiny of the memory fall and its painful sharpness just be. He sags backwards against Raphael.

[godheals]

Raphael would do his best to support Enoch as they moved down the stairs and, when they came outside the library, guided him in. There were a few desks with chairs here that Enoch could probably sit down in.

"..It does seem that way. out of what, I do not know. But if they have only pulled our souls here, then they must have manufactured our bodies."

[warriorscribe]

Enoch slumped into the first chair Raphael guided him to, his head on the table.

"They seem to be ordinary flesh..."

[godheals]

And Raphael would just sit down in the seat across Enoch.

"Not everything here is as it appears to be."