towerofanimus | In the greyness and drizzle of one despondent dawn...

Characters: Nesir Aeser and you
Setting: Floor 20
Format: Prose but I will switch
Summary: Aftermath of being a drone.
Warnings: just event stuff and dark thoughts

When Nesir had seen the dress laid out on her bed she had almost lost her temper, cut it up and thrown it away. But she had forced herself to stay calm because it had been given to her to provoke that reaction, to make her lose control. And she wouldn't, she had put it on instead, transferring the poisons to the hidden pockets, and moving her daggers across.

She had never worn it before, it had been stowed in her trunk in the temple after Lotte had thrown it at her in anger, I had it made specially for you, and I almost had to bury you in it.

Only fitting that she should wear it now then, beyond death. A soul trapped, away from the natural order of things and kept, contained.

Theirs to do what they liked with. Nesir sat on floor twenty, at the edge of the tower, legs dangling off the side staring out into the fog and emptiness. She remembered every moment, the pain, the brainwashing, the feeling that everything was alright, her actions, what she had done, attacking, killing.

She had been controlled before, both as training and punishment. Her body a puppet. It happened rarely, for she rarely disobeyed, had never disobeyed before she went to the temple. Yet this had been different, because her mind had always been her own. She might not be able to speak, to move except on the whims of whoever was pulling the strings, but she could think, she could curse them silently, she could fight back mentally.

But even that had been taken away, her mind had been theirs, she had obeyed them mindlessly. Helpless, like a child, unable to fight back, not even wanting to...

And as far as she could gather there was no reason except that they could.

Causing chaos, it was a motive she could get behind but these were blasphemers, they worshiped no shadow god, they stole souls, they played with life and death itself.

Her life and death, her soul, her mind. She was more than a puppet, she had proven that. She made her own decisions, she was her own person. She was Nesir, she had made the name her own, she was Culbu. She had earned a name, and she had earned her free will. She was obedient, she was loyal. She didn't need to be controlled.

But these people played by no rules she knew and seemed determined to prove her wrong.

She would destroy them, she did not know how, or when, but she would. She didn't know if the shadow god could hear her hear, but she closed her eyes and pledged it, the destruction of this place, the blood of everyone who stood against her.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

"I would be saying we will no be letting them but..." She turned to look at Ocelot for the first time, "They do be being so powerful, I can no be thinking of any way to even be getting near to be beating them. They can be turning off our limbs, they can be controlling our minds. How do we be fighting against that?"

Not even the gods had that much direct control over a person and it terrified her more than she could let herself admit.

"I don't know," Ocelot admitted slowly. What could she do? This wasn't going to be as easy as they had first hoped. But Ocelot had spent her entire life fighting on enemy or another She had grown up under the shadow of her mother, the greatest American patriot to ever live-- to the point where she had died disgraced and still loved her country.

But Ocelot was not her mother. She could not have blind patriotism. She held no loyalty to any country. Here, she could really only trust herself. There had to be some way to outsmart the administrators. For them to be truly free of this psychotic control over the residents of the tower. "There must be something that can be done." She wasn't stupid enough to voice her ideas, though. At least not now.

Nesir glared at the worker again, it didn't seem to notice or care, and Nesir understood that, and it made her feel sick.

Nesir was used to powerful people being in control, but before she had been working for them, not against them and she really didn't have the first idea how to start.

"It do be like trying to beat the gods." She looked out at the clouds and fog again, "In their own realm."

"It is," Ocelot agreed. But she was a stubborn soldier. She was not beyond taking on gods. After all, the Patriots controlled every facet of life in the world. They might have been computers, but they were effectively gods.

That wouldn't stop her. That would never stop her. "But even gods can be destroyed."

She blinked at that, because Lancelot had said that gods could be replaced, and now Ocelot was claiming they could be destroyed but in Nesir's experience they were all powerful.

But Dax had died and so she guessed in this case, they could be. "We do just be needing more power."

She was sure that their conversation was going to find its way back to Jason, but she didn't care. Let him sit there, thinking that he was safe and capable of taking down any threat that came his way. She'd kill every last one of the administrators, save for Zo.

"We do," she agreed with a grim smile.

Nesir wasn't planning on even sparing Zo, she knew how dangerous children could be, and killing the guardians of a child with so much power and leaving him alive would lead to nothing sane.

"But that do be being the extent of my plans." She said, turning to glare at the worker unit, wondering if it was worth the effort to try and lose it.

Ocelot's idea at the moment was to try and bring Zo to the side of the people of the tower. He was very young, and more than likely was already being influenced by Ruana. It would be a dangerous task for certain.

"We need to figure out a more secure method of communication," Ocelot said, her gaze following Nesir's. They couldn't speak openly. It wouldn't be safe. Any communication they had would get back to the administrators, and now she was certain that the fact that they were going to be trying to find new methods would get back to Jason.

Nesir nodded thoughtfully, itching to just throw a dagger at the thing and get rid of it. But she knew others would only come in its place. Perhaps retrieval units, to stop them and bring order back to the tower.

Those thoughts were too close to what she had believed the last week and she clenched her fists, angry at herself for not being able to forget and move on.

They were never going to be safe again, that much Ocelot knew. Even so, she was thinking of a plan, something that she was certain was, for the moment, a better alternative than speaking openly. "I have a plan," she said quietly, eyes flashing to the worker unit. It stared at her blankly, and she turned away, regarding Nesir carefully. "Give me time."

Nesir glanced at the worker as well, glaring at it again before looking back to Ocelot and nodding slowly. "Okay."

He hand moved gentle back on Nesir's should for a moment. "I'll be in touch again when I have a better plan." She smiled, almost warmly. "Stay strong."

She didn't move away this time, just gave a soft smile in return. "Thank you, and you be staying strong too."

In the greyness and drizzle of one despondent dawn...

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