towerofanimus | [ 08 ] ✿✿ [ Open ]

Characters:

Dark Rin & YOU!
Setting: Floors 100, 99, 96, dormitories & the cafeteria
Time: Through end of April to early May, general tower life catch all.
Format: Quick to start, will match.
Summary: For the first time in months, Rin is without a Servant bound to her. Not only that, she's being stalked by retrieval units and a number of other individuals. The question is if her mind can withstand the paranoia weighing down on it or if she'll just brush it off without a care.
Warnings: Usual Rin warning, all tw-content will be marked if it comes up. Floor 100 prompt is kind of squicky if you know the context (crest worms).

►►► FLOOR 100;
[ Rin isn't sure what compels her to come to this floor but while she's here, she doesn't see the home that she thought she might want to see. Sure, the Tohsaka mansion is nice, but the memory is so fuzzy that all this place can work with is that dark basement. Maybe there's a part of her deep inside that misses that musky place crawling with the vermin that's familiar with every inch of her body. At least when she was there she didn't have to worry about being betrayed or left behind because by that point in her life, she was completely alone. If anyone were to invade on her privacy here though, Rin might not respond favorably. After all, that's a very crucial bit from her childhood that she might like to keep a secret. Even if she's unaware that others only see what they want to see and that the only thing giving away her privacy is her big mouth... ]

►►► FLOOR 99;
[ Her home floor or well, it used to be back before she died. Since she's returned to this body (a new one), something has been different. Is it because her vision is sharper than ever before that the light of the crystals bother her or is it something else? While she's not used to talking to herself, it has been lonely enough that she does slip up every now and again. ]

I see, I see now. This floor really is cursed to drive you mad, isn't it? [ Inane ramblings from a girl with red eyes and white hair shouldn't be all that strange to hear, right? ]

►►► FLOOR 96;
[ Her white hair matches this floor, so she's found some kind of solace in that. At least that's what she tells herself as she lays on the floor lazily with her hair spread out. Anytime she closes her eyes, her mind feels less and less burdened by her thoughts. Isn't it strange how that works out? It reminds her of how she was just a few weeks ago and then the vision of a knight in red bringing a sword down causes her to bolt upright. If anyone else was nearby to catch her, she'll just sneer in their general direction as though accusing them silently of invading her privacy. ]

►►► DORMITORIES;
[ Often Rin is paranoid. This doesn't end favorably for those who choose to play a prank by sneaking up on her and monsters that attempt to do the same end up ripped apart by her magecraft. This week, day and night, she can be found wandering the dormitory levels in her inability to sleep peacefully. Rarely does she visit her room, only going there when the paranoia of not doing so kicks in. While she's often contemplative, there are times instead where she's playing a prank of her own. The retrieval units that follow her nearby seem to have been scribbled on, messages drawn on them meant to antagonize someone, but who? And besides, who's crazy enough to get close to one to draw a penis on it's forehead?

Spoilers, it's Rin. She's the crazy one. In fact, she just might be acting out intentionally in order to draw out someone. ]

►►► CAFETERIA;
[ For the remainder of April, Rin can be found often pulling out the nutrition bars with a look of disappointment on her face. The past few months have spoiled her with Archer bringing her breakfast in bed, cooking lunch and dinner, and even being kind enough to bring her something in the middle of the night if she woke up from a nightmare ~~not that she's ever going to admit to that~~. Now she sees what it's like for others, but instead of sympathizing with them? ]

How droll. An individual of my standing shouldn't have to resort to eating this piss. [ And that's a bar thrown over her shoulder, possibly aimed at someone's head. ] I demand real food or else I'll starve!

[ Rin pls. No one cares. ]

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

That means her soul is still here somewhere.

[ It has to be, she insists to herself. Where else would it go? Did they just not have a body for vessels anymore and if so, what would happen to Rin if she were to die again? ]

Somewhere. [And some day she will find her.]

I believe she may be the same place I was when I disappeared for a while. I just do not know how to get there yet.

But yes, she is the reason I come here for solitude.

Where you disappeared? [ Asking for clarification. ]

I'll help you find this place if you can tell me more about it. I know most of these floors, but... [ Only from before she died so her memory isn't exactly the keenest. ] It'll take some time.

You did not notice my disappearance after the dreamscape we were both within, but a few days after that, I found myself in what I believed was Fuyuki City. Barren, empty, devoid... nothing.

I was there alone for... I am unsure how long I was gone before I found myself awake here again. That was back when you and I last had... a moment together.

I do not believe I was inside the Tower, but I no longer believe I was in Fuyuki City.

I remember it vaguely.

[ Raising a hand to touch the back of her own neck nervously, she thinks on it. ]

If you were there, were you human or a spirit? I know it's a strange question, but if it was the real world, then they can't exactly send these bodies there right? The collars, that's the key she said.

[ Rin's thoughts make no sense to anyone but herself. They may be broken up right now, but to her it's starting to piece together. ]

If it wasn't Fuyuki City or the Tower, then what could it have been? Some other astral plane of sorts?

I was as I was now, without the collar. I do not believe I am a good example as the body of a heroic spirit is always a construct.

[This concept of the soul and body being separate was nothing new to Saber.]

I am not a magus, Rin. Magecraft is not the way of a king. I cannot answer that question. Though I think it may be a place between our worlds and the Tower.

I'm not sure if that's possible, Saber.

[ Dismissing her own theories, Rin tries to figure out what it means. A place between their worlds and the Tower? ]

Heh, what is this? Some kind of afterlife and that plane is purgatory?

This is not an afterlife. I have yet to acquire the Holy Grail, nor have I given up on it. Until then, I will continue to exist and not reach A-- an afterlife. Perhaps it is something like the Throne of Heroes?

That's an excellent theory, but what's a place like that doing calling someone like me to it?

[ A jab at her non-heroic nature, of course. ] Well, it doesn't matter what this place is. We now have a common goal to find this woman of yours and well, you can leave the fate of the admins in my hands.

[A slight smirk.] I did say something like the Throne of Heroes. Clearly, it is not. [Since Saber was there after all...]

Answer me this, Rin: What will you do with their power once you have consumed it?

What would anyone with power do?

[ A sage nod. ] Build a nice throne to sit down and then just relax. I suppose I'd watch over the people who were loyal to me and have to solve disputes. That's the sort of thing a leader does, isn't it?

[ Not that Saber would know anything about being a leader, right? Perhaps this is the magus trying to gleam knowledge from the Servant. ]

Edited 2013-05-07 10:11 (UTC)

That is one aspect of having enough power to rule. It is not all. Nor is it all a leader does.

I know that. I think being a leader is a lot of tough work to be honest with you.

[ Inclining her head to the side a bit as she looks her over. ] They make the call that needs to be made and there's always someone who's bound to be sour with them for it. Knowing that you've upset one person or possibly thousands is a hard thing to shoulder.

But shoulder it you must. A true leader is a lonely person. No one else ever understands why the decisions must be made, why they are correct and the weight of each decision is theirs alone to bear. Even the greatest leaders that bring countries and kingdoms to prosperity, is just and never errors in judgment will be looked upon as something unfit to rule if enough time passes.

The common person and even those close will doubt the leader's abilities even if there has never been any indication that they are unworthy. [She closes her eyes briefly.] It is the folly of men and the foolishness of leaders to believe such folly will not find them.

You speak from experience of some kind, Saber?

[ While it was meant as a jest, she does continue to clink away at the guarded aura that was her identity. ]

I'm not sure if I have what it takes to be a leader, but I've got experience with being lonely. I can handle that, so that means I should be able to shoulder the rest of the burdens.

Are you capable of making a decision that must be made, knowing it would eventually lead to the end your own life? Can you look at something you want more desperately than anything else and turn from it for the benefit of those you lead?

If you cannot do those things, you are not ready to be a leader.

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