towerofanimus | Leave your reasoning behind [open]

Entry tags:

Leave your reasoning behind [open]

Characters: Romeo and you!
Setting: Dorm halls, bathrooms and rooms
Format: Either
Summary: People with orange collars may go berserk at any moment Diarmuid and Hei are going to be the ones to stop him, but anyone else is very welcome to hurt him/be hurt by him/run away from him before that.
Warnings: Berserk twelve year old with a knife

Romeo came out of one of the bathrooms carrying the bucket of cleaning supplies. He had almost finished his job for the day and he was glad because then he could go and check that his friends were okay! Bad things were happening again, and people were acting strange and writing on the walls. Romeo had thought about writing something nice, but he knew that sometimes the tower made nice things bad.

And he didn't want to risk it. So he had concentrated on making sure his friends had enough food since the food in the cafeteria was bad again and checking that no one was hurt too much. He hummed as he skipped down the corridor, just one bathroom to go!

A moment later he let out a scream of rage and dropped the bucket, chemicals and water spilled everywhere, pooling round his bare feet but he didn't seem to care as he pulled his makeshift knife from his pocket and ran down the corridor towards the nearest room, towards people.

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"Mister Diarmuid?" Romeo's voice is quiet and lacking it's usual cheer. He remembered attacking him and mister Hei and wanting to hurt them. How he had screamed at them and wanted to kill them both.

He didn't know why he had done that. He'd been acting like Gamzee sometimes did and he wondered if the trolls problem of sometimes being nice and sometimes being awful and angry was like a sickness, and if Romeo had caught it.

He wrapped his arms round himself and winced because he hurt a lot. "I'm sorry sir."

Edited 2013-05-30 07:45 (UTC)

Diarmuid's expression softens and he is opening the cell door before he even has to consciously think about it. Once he has, he motions for Romeo to come out, "Don't be sorry. There is no reason to be. I know that it might be hard to understand, but what you did wasn't your fault. It was one of the tower's experiments. I just wish there was more we could have done to calm you down. I hated locking you in here, but it was the only option we had."

When he sees the boy wince, his expression grows concerned, "Are you hurt? Shall I take you down to the infirmary?"

"I know. They like making us be bad and hurt each other." His voice was still quiet, he didn't blame mister Diarmuid for putting him in the cell at all, he was glad they had done it before he could hurt anyone.

At the mention of the infirmary he paled and shook his head, "They're bad I don't want to go there sir. I'm okay promise." He gave a smile, slightly forced because it did hurt but he didn't want Diarmuid to worry.

Diarmuid nods, offering a hand to help him out of the cell, "Yes, that is exactly right so I hope you won't blame yourself too much for this. However, if you want to talk about how you feel, I will be glad to listen. Sometimes it helps to talk about things like this."

He tilts his head slightly, looking confused at Romeo's fear of the infirmary, "Did something happen there? Usually when I am there it is empty except..." His voice trails off as something suddenly crosses his mind, "Oh! Do you mean for collar check ups? Don't worry. If we go now, it will only be the two of us. I don't want to push you, but I am worried about your injuries. Maybe if you tell me where you hurt I can go grab a few supplies?"

It would take a while, even with his speed, but it would be better than leaving Romeo hurting.

Romeo blinked, though people had told him he should talk about his feelings before he found it strange, it was much easier to just keep his spirits up and move on.

"I mean the workers, they do bad things..." Even with Diamuid it wouldn't be safe, they could hurt him too. He knew it was babyish but he didn't want to go there, even though he knew they would only hurt him when mister Jason told them to.

"Here hurts." He gestured at his ribs, "And my head. But I'm okay mister Diamuid you don't got to get anything."

Diarmuid's look is still worried. He doesn't want to force the boy to go to the infirmary if he is honestly that scared of it, but he also doesn't want him suffering. This is one of those times where he really wishes that he was like his brother and able to use runic magic. A healing spell would be very handy right now.

"I don't like leaving you in pain, Romeo, but I will make you a deal. Tell me more about how much you hurt. Does anything feel broken or funny? I may not be the best medic in the world, but I do know a little about injuries. If yours don't seem that bad once you describe them better than I will let it go," And if they do seem serious, perhaps he can get the boy to let him take him to see Cecil. She is a healer and Diarmuid has no doubt she will easily be able to fix the boy's wounds.

He thought about it for a moment, "My chest really hurts, a bit like when I broke my leg but not as bad and I don't think you can break your chest." Though you could apparently break your heart, but Tohko said that was different. "My head just feels like I got hit really hard." He brought his hand up and ran it through his hair, it hurt but his hand came away dry. "I'm not bleeding though!"

"There are things in your chest that will break. They are bones called ribs," Diarmuid knows this from experience breaking them in his own fights since broken ribs could cause all kinds of damage to the softer things in a person's chest. "When you breath or move do you feel anything shifting that shouldn't? Or pinching or poking where you shouldn't feel any of that?"

He's honestly not too worried about the boy's chest for the moment because if there had been a more serious injury, they would already know from how long he had been in the cell. The blow Romeo must have taken to the head is what worries Diarmuid more because of how tricky injuries there can be.

Unconsciously, he raises a finger and passes it in front of the boy's eyes. Diarmuid's has no clue why he's doing it until a few more bits of grail given information pop into his head, "How is your vision? Is it blurry? Can you track my finger with your eyes?"

He tried breathing in deeply, "I don't think so sir. I don't know." He shook his head, he peered at the finger and followed it with his eyes. "I can see okay, it doesn't look funny or anything."

Diarmuid nods, and lets his hand drop, "Promise me you will let me know if the pain changes, okay? Especially, if it gets worse. I don't think that is likely, but I don't like taking risks when it comes to people's health."

Reasonably convinced that Romeo's injuries aren't something that needs immediate attention--though honestly he still would have liked to take him to the infirmary--Diarmuid lets his mind drift back to what they had been talking about before the injuries had come up.

"Did you want to talk about what happened, Romeo?"

Romeo nodded, "I promise sir." He smiled, to show he was alright though it faded a moment later. He thought about it because it might have been less scary to just keep his spirits up, and that's what he usually did.

But it was a big thing and he thought he wanted to talk about it, to try and make it make sense.

"I wanted to hurt people... and I think I scared a little girl really badly..."

Diarmuid recognizes Romeo's attempt to be strong for what it is and understands it. He reaches out and gently squeezes the boy's shoulder careful not to accidentally hurt him in the process since he knows the boy is already hurting, "There are times when it's best to be strong and times when it is best to let your feelings out. When I am around, feel free to let those emotions out, okay? No one can be strong all the time. Attempting to do so will only lead to failure in the future."

He knows this from personal experience.

"This girl you scared, do you know her name? Or if not, do you remember what she looked like? While we often cannot control what they make us do here, we can control what we do afterward in response to those things. While apologies can only do so much, I have a feeling that if you talk to her and apologize you will feel better about things. And she probably will as well. If words really aren't enough for her, perhaps she will tell you something you can do that will help with that. A task of some sort to show that you are sincere in your words."

"No..." He tried to think, think past all the angry bad thoughts he had had and thought about the girl. "She had brown hair, and was a bit bigger than me." He thought again.

"Oh and she little animal thing with her, that had magic it looked like a ball with an eye and funny hands."

Diarmuid is quiet for several moments, searching through his memory to try and remember if he has met anyone who fits that description. Unfortunately, the answer he comes to is not one the one he wants, "I have not met anyone who looks like that. Do you use the Network much, Romeo? Perhaps it would not hurt to ask if the people here will help you find her? Maybe she will answer your message?"

"I could do sir!" He grinned, glad that he had something practical to do. "The I can say sorry and make it up to her."

"Yes! That is an excellent plan. In fact, if there is anyone else who you may wish to apologize to, you can do it there too!" Diarmuid lightly squeezes the boy's shoulder again before letting his hand fall away. "I may not much like the Network, but it certainly has its uses sometimes, doesn't it?"

Romeo nodded, it did even if there were sometimes bad things on it.

"I should say sorry to the silver haired man too... He was really really mad though, I don't think he will accept my apology." He looked sad at that, because he felt bad.

"Don't give up just yet. Even if he was angry, his anger may have passed. And if he chooses to hold against you what you could not control, then that is his problem," Diarmuid gives Romeo a reassuring smile. "If you do all that you can to apologize, then there is no more you can do. Unfortunately, some people take time to forgive."

If they forgive at all, he adds to himself, images of Fionn mac Cumhaill passing through his mind.

"Just don't give up. Get things started and hopefully someday he will find it in his heart to forgive you even if he can't do it right away."

~~Oh Diarmuid if only you knew who he was talking about...~~

Romeo nodded with a smile. "That's a really good idea sir! I'll do that and even if he's really mad at least he knows I'm sorry and maybe one day wont be so angry. Or maybe I could do something to make up for it."

"I would start with the apology first and see how he accepts it. If he is really angry with you, it might not be a good idea to offer to do something for him right away. He might take his anger out on you when there is no real reason for him to." Considering how innocent Romeo seems to be, Diarmuid can't help but worry that could end up being a very real possibility, "Even though you are doing things to help make up for what happened, they have no right to ask anything of you that would put you at risk."

"But I hurt him." Romeo blinked at him, "So I should do whatever they want to make it better, and he's an adult so he's probably really really mad."

And whereas things could be made up to other kids easily, he thought adults probably stayed mad for much longer.

"No, Romeo, that is not right. Listen," Diarmuid shifts so that he can look the boy right in the eyes. "I understand you feel like you should give everything to make it right with him, but if you do that and he hurts you or even kills you, how will you be able to make things right with that girl? Or anyone else you might have accidentally upset? It might be hard to be selfish sometimes, but if you want to be able to help others, you need to be. It might just need to be a little, but you need to be."

Romeo shrugged, "If he kills me I'll just come back tomorrow." It was no big deal and if that's what it took for him to feel better and not be mad anymore.

"Being selfish is a really bad thing mister Diarmuid."

"But what about that 24 hours while you are not here?" Diarmuid asks honestly. "What if someone needs you during that time? I know being selfish is bad, but perhaps it is not so bad if you are being selfish not for yourself but for others? If someone needs you and you are not available because someone else has hurt or killed you, what is more selfish? Denying that person who needs your help or denying the person who would hurt or kill you?"

Diarmuid pauses, trying to think of any other way to try and explain his point to Romeo. It is a complex one, he realizes and he's not sure if it is something a boy of Romeo's age can actually understand, but he wants to try anyway, "If you cannot make that choice, maybe it will help to look at it like this. Letting someone hurt or kill you only helps one person. But being alive and unhurt potentially allows you to help everyone. What is the better choice?"

At almost thirteen Romeo should have been old enough to understand and accept the point, but he had always be stubborn especially when it came to helping others. But he tried very hard to listen and understand what Diarmuid was telling him.

"Well I guess I'd want to help everyone. But what if someone was trying to hurt my friends and the only way to stop them was to get hurt myself, it would be more bad to let them get hurt instead of me. And what if I really did do something bad, like if I really really hurt the silver haired man even if it was the bad people. You're meant to be punished when you do bad things."

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