Yotsuba!&...

[sunflowerfairy]

Characters: Yotsuba Koiwai and you!
Setting: The meadow, the mailroom, and most of anywhere else.
Format: I'm starting in prose, but I'll match you.
Summary: A catch-all post for the Individuation event.
Warnings: Other than a crying Yotsuba, I can't think of anything right now.

At first, the shadows following her had been a little scary, mostly because Yotsuba didn't know where they came from or why they were following her. But it was kind of fun to have them follow her around, like they were all playing one huge game of follow the leader! So, she didn't mind them following her into the mailroom and laughed a little as she looked inside her mailbox..and pulled out a photo of her Daddy hugging her, Jumbo next to them, and the family next door-Ena, Fuka, Asagi, and their Mommy-surrounding them in the background. Surprised and happy, Yotsuba's eyes shined as she looked at the photograph before showing it to the shadows.

"Look! They're all here! Daddy and Jumbo and Fuka and-"

"Those aren't them. That's a lie, Yotsuba." That voiced surprised her, not because it came from one of the shadows, but because it sounded like Jumbo! "It's not! And why do you sound like Jumbo?! It's a good photo-oh.." As she spoke, Yotsuba kept looking at the photograph, just to make sure that it wasn't a lie..but slowly, it changed so that it showed her in a dying wasteland with her family and friends dead all around her.

"No..everything's gonna be fixed..and I'm not alone.."

Here, Yotsuba could be found sitting here with her sketchbook, crayons and Little Yoba, trying to draw what she thought was going to be the actual future. However, she didn't look very happy, and while she did make an honest attempt at it, it was very hard to draw when the souls of the people you loved kept belittling you. Eventually, while they were still there, Yotsuba mostly just hugged Little Yoba and weakly spoke to Daddy and Jumbo, who kept telling her that they didn't love her, that if Daddy hadn't adopted her, he might have been saved, and that Enoch, Diarmuid, and everyone else was going to break their promise and leave her too, all alone in the horrible place she saw.

This..was way too much for her to handle. Eventually, despite a few optimistic comments to the shadows and asking them why they hated her now, Yotsuba just started crying on Little Yoba and talking to her dolly. "Yotsuba doesn't even know what adopted is..do you know, Little Yoba?"

Yotsuba had a tendency to run around and explore, and this wouldn't change that..but she would be looking for Enoch, answers..and silence. She's pretty much free to bump into your characters, even though she'll be more tired than usual, and even though her collar will slowly become lighter, though Yotsuba herself won't notice until someone else points it out.

Comments

Meadow

[oathshackledbird]

Yotsuba? What's wrong?

[Diarmuid appears at her side, crouching down so that he can be on the same level as she is. He's just barely keeping himself from hugging her at the moment and would already be doing so if he hadn't been worried about startling her and upsetting her more. Seeing her so upset is actually a little frightening since he is so used to her being able to see the best in everything, and, as a result, remaining happy even in the darkest of times.

There is nothing happy about her expression now. His eyes dart to the shadow children around her and he can't help but wonder how much they have to do with this. Perhaps he would know more, but for the moment it seems he has no followers of his own so he really has no idea how they may or may not be affecting those they follow.]

Shall we sing one of Rabbit's songs like I promised we would? Will that make you feel better?

Meadow

[sunflowerfairy]

[At first, Yotsuba didn't notice that Diarmuid was in the meadow, as she was still trying to figure out what adopted was and why Daddy hated her, even as the shadow that was her father told her that it wasn't good to cry..especially since it couldn't fix anything now. It was already too late.

Those words just made Yotsuba cry harder, and when Diarmuid spoke to her, she quickly took Little Yoba out of her lap and stood up so that she could try and hug him. She had waited and worried about Daddy and Jumbo..and now they seemed to hate her. Would they have been saved if she and Daddy never met?]

Dia..what's..adop..adopshed? And..why..is Daddy saying..that he doesn't love me?! Yotsuba doesn't know..but you're not a liar..and I don't wanna be alone..

[The last parts would probably make very little sense to Diarmuid, but Yotsuba was in a pretty bad state, thanks to the shadows telling her that her friends were lying and that she was too by saying the same things and that, in the end, she would end up alone, just like in the picture.]

Meadow

[oathshackledbird]

[Diarmuid doesn't hesitate. As soon as Yotsuba shows she wants a hug, he pulls her into his arms and hugs her as tightly as he can without hurting her. His eyes narrow as he glares at the shadows over her shoulder. He might not know what they are really, but he can't help but think they are the reason she is so upset. Still, he is more worried about calming her down then dealing with them at the moment. He makes some soft, calming sounds before answering her questions.]

Adopted? Were you adopted, Little One? There is nothing wrong with that. It is just another kind of family. I was adopted myself. Well...in my day it was called fostering, but by my understanding it is a very similar thing. I had two mothers and a father who took care of me, but others had one mother or two fathers, or just a mother or just a father. Who you have really isn't all that important. What is important is that they love you and take care of you. They are your family.

[Diarmuid lightly strokes her hair.]

Do you understand? Your daddy does love you. He wouldn't have taken care of you otherwise. Who is telling you these terrible things?

[Because whoever it is will soon find a very angry Servant hunting them. Just as soon as he is sure Yotsuba is going to be okay.]

Meadow

[sunflowerfairy]

[While Yotsuba loved getting hugged, and while those calming sounds might have worked on any other day, since she would have been so puzzled by them that she would have calmed down, she was so shook up right now that she just..couldn't calm down. Even if she had managed to stop crying a little, she was still shocked and sad.]

I understand...but Daddy's saying that! Daddy doesn't love me anymore..and Jumbo doesn't either..

[While Yotsuba wasn't in any position to stop the shadows, her Shadow Daddy picked up Little Yoba as he spoke.]

I'm taking this, Yotsuba. A dolly can't be saved, so having one would have been much better than having you. Those words just caused Yotsuba to start sobbing all over again, so she didn't hear the Shadow Jumbo's reply-that it was a good idea and that they should take the sketchbook too so that the dolly had something to do.

Meadow

[oathshackledbird]

Yotsuba, you need to listen to me.

[He loosens his hold on her so that he can look her in the face.]

I don't know why you are hearing your friend and your father, but they aren't really here. It's a trick of the Tower. Jason is very mad at all of us this month. He is doing his very best to make us hurt as much as he can right now.

[Diarmuid might not be able to hear what the shadows are saying to Yotsuba, but he does notice when they start messing with her things. While he might not be able to do anything to the shadows directly, he is able to reach out and grab the doll away from the shadow that picked it up. He also takes the time to gather her sketchbook and other belongings to set next to them and away from the shadows.

He then gives the shadows a dark look.]

Those things are hers. Leave them be.

[Diarmuid doesn't know if they can hear or understand him, but he's going to try anyway.]

Meadow

[sunflowerfairy]

[While Diarmuid's words would have calmed Yotsuba down and made sense to her at any other time, right now, they just made her feel like she wasn't being understood. She didn't know why the bad people were mad at everyone, but it was obvious to her that her Daddy's and Jumbo's souls had been found. But..they weren't happy about it, for some reason.

Oddly enough, the shadows would retreat a step back when Diarmuid ripped the doll out of her Shadow Daddy's hands, as if they were afraid of him getting too close. Yotsuba, who had heard her father's words, watched her Daddy and Diarmuid argue-at least, she though it was like an argument-before speaking again, trying to stay calm. She kept sniffling as she spoke, but..speak she did.]

Daddy..we've found you..so why can't you be saved? Enoch said he'd help, so why do you hate me? Jumbo..why?

[First, her Shadow Father spoke, telling her that Enoch was lying and that she was a bad girl for believing him. Then Jumbo cut in, saying that it was too late for them, and since they had taken her in, they had lowered their chanced to be saved. It was her fault. If she wasn't there, they would still have bodies. That shut her up and just caused even more tears to fall.

She was really not taking any of this well.]

Meadow

[oathshackledbird]

[Diarmuid frowns. As young and upset as she is, he's not sure if there is a way to make her completely understand what he is trying to say especially when he's not sure exactly what is going on himself. It's time to try a different approach.]

Yotsuba, you're upset and scared right now, aren't you?

[He gives her a gentle look and ruffles her hair.]

I know that what your daddy and Jimbo are saying hurts, but do you think maybe they are saying these things because they are scared and upset too? Just like you are? They don't know me and they don't know Enoch so it's probably hard for them to trust we will do as we say we will.

But you trust us, right? You know we will do as we have said we will. Everyone will be saved. I promise. Right now, try to be strong and understand that while what they say hurts, they don't really mean it.

Meadow

[sunflowerfairy]

[Normally, a hair ruffle and a gentle look would have made her smile and laugh. Today though..not so much. While it provided some comfort, it did not provide enough to calm her down or make her feel better.]

I do..but they know me! And..they say that they might have been saved without me. Why would they say that if they didn't mean it?! Daddy and Jumbo aren't liars!

Meadow

[oathshackledbird]

That's right, they aren't, but things are very confusing in this place. Wouldn't you agree? It's easy for intelligent adults to get confused let alone children.

[Diarmuid nods toward the shadows, convinced now that the voices are most likely coming from them considering how they are acting and how Yotsuba is acting toward them.]

What I'm saying is that I think your daddy and Jimbo are confused and being confused can lead to people being scared and angry. It's possible they think they know something, but they are wrong and just don't realize it. Haven't you ever believed something only to find out later you were wrong?

Meadow

[sunflowerfairy]

[For Yotsuba, adults usually just didn't know things, like she did. In her world, it was hard for them to get confused about things. Plus, even if they were confused about things, why wouldn't they believe her when she tried to explain the situation? And why would they say that they hated her when they had loved her before this whole mess?]

Yotsuba has..-

"Which hasn't made our lives any easier, you know. After all, you got so confused over the neighbors." "She did cause trouble for me too. It's a shame that I didn't run her over." "That is a pity."

[Yotsuba couldn't help but cry a little at that, but she blubbered out the rest of her words.]

But they didn't hate Yotsuba before! Jumbo didn't hate me..and Daddy didn't either..why would they be confused about that? I don't understand at all..

Meadow

[oathshackledbird]

Easy, easy, little one!

[Diarmuid reaches up and cups her face in his hands, using his thumbs to wipe some of the tears away.]

Being upset makes it hard to understand anything and you are very upset right now. I know it's hard, but sometimes you just have to accept that you can't understand everything. It's frustrating, I know. I feel it all the time here, but when you are an adult it's something you have to learn to accept.

I know you are still young Yotsuba, but right now you need to try and be an adult, okay? Can you try to do that for me?

Meadow

[sunflowerfairy]

[Yotsuba would allow him to do so, and while she moved to wipe at her right eye, she focused as hard as she could to hear what Diarmuid was saying. Diarmuid's definition of being an adult sounded weird to her, but she did nod her head a little, even though she wasn't calmed down at all.]

'Kay..I'll try..but what can we do if we don't understand, Dia?

Meadow

[oathshackledbird]

[Diarmuid smiles gently at the nickname. Only rarely had he been called that particular one in the past. His friends usually preferred to call him Diar instead, playing off the way it sounded like 'deer.'

Needless to say, he prefers this nickname much more.]

What do we do? We try our hardest to find the answers that will make us less confused, that is what we do. Often it is a long, hard process but if we never give up eventually we will find what we need to stop being so confused.

Meadow

[sunflowerfairy]

[Yotsuba had recently gotten into the habit of making nicknames, thanks to her encounter with Lucifel. She wouldn't do it with everyone, but with people she liked with long names, it helped. While she was unaware of how his name could be twisted to sound like 'deer', she wouldn't see it as a bad thing, since animals were pretty cool.]

Okay then..Yotsuba won't give up then. Where can we find the answers? I don't know where they're hiding..but Yotsuba won't give up!

"Are you sure, Yotsuba? After all, giving up can sometimes make you much happier. After all, if Koiwai and I had given up on you, we might have been happier."

[At that, Yotsuba actually..glared a little at the shadows. It didn't mean she hated Jumbo or Daddy, but she could get a little angry and loud sometimes when they tried to steer her in a direction she didn't want to go.]

"I won't give up! After all..I wouldn't be able to see you now if I gave up before."

"Which is why you should have given up. We didn't want to see you again.

[And, at that, Yotsuba would just bite her lip hard and try not to cry. She had to be an adult now.]

Meadow

[oathshackledbird]

[A proud look crosses Diarmuid's face. While he can't hear what the shadows are saying to Yotsuba, considering what she's said they were saying, Diarmuid is sure it's nothing good. Still, this time she manages not to immediately break into tears. That is a big step forward.

He reaches out and ruffles her hair again.]

Good girl! I know it hurts, but you are strong and brave. Keep being that way and we will definitely track down those answers. Unfortunately, it's hard to say where the answers will be found. We just have to keep looking everywhere we can. The more we look the sooner things can be fixed and the sooner your daddy and Jimbo won't be upset and confused anymore.

Meadow

[sunflowerfairy]

[What the shadows were saying wasn't good at all, and Yotsuba didn't feel brave or strong at all, even though Diarmuid kept calling her that, and even though the hair ruffling did feel nice. This did remind her of when the glamour was turned off. Back then, Diarmuid didn't have the answers..but Enoch did. Maybe he would know what was going on here. Maybe he would know how to calm down Daddy and Jumbo.]

Okay..Diarmuid, Enoch knew about the glamour when we didn't. Maybe he'll know how to help Jumbo and Daddy.

Meadow

[oathshackledbird]

That is possible. After all, Enoch is a very intelligent man. That is why it is so important to make friends with a lot of people. What one might not know, another may.

[And it doesn't hurt that this particular friend is one of the leaders of the Resistance. Diarmuid has no doubt that if there is anyone who knows something, it could very well be Enoch.]

Yotsuba, would you like to try and find Enoch? I can carry you around the Tower while we look. You know how fast I am and if Enoch has shadows following him he probably could use a visit to help cheer him up. What do you say?

[It's something of a trick. Diarmuid knows that if he takes her around, her shadows won't be able to keep up granting her a little time away from their taunts. Eventually, they will catch up to her, but Diarmuid is sure that even a little time away from them will help her feel much better.]

Meadow

[sunflowerfairy]

[While that was a good reason to make friends, Yotsuba never thought about it when she was making them. She just liked to make friend with people and play with them when she could.]

Okay! Let's all go and find Enoch then! It'll be fun! Daddy and Jumbo would like to meet him!

[Sadly, Yotsuba had no idea of what Diarmuid is plotting and automatically assumed that he wouldn't go too fast so that Daddy and Jumbo would be able to keep up. Even though they hated her now, she still loved them. She couldn't abandon them, not when she had been waiting for them to be found for so long.]

Meadow

[oathshackledbird]

[Diarmuid shakes his head. He's not surprised at her assumption that Jimbo and her daddy could come along. He's also not so cruel that he will let her think that when he knows it's not true.]

I can't carry Jimbo and your daddy too, Little One, and they won't be able to keep up with me. Why don't we let them stay here to enjoy the Meadow while we go find Enoch? If he is sad, it will be better for him just to have friends around at the moment, won't it? You can introduce Jimbo and your daddy to him once everyone is feeling better, okay?

Meadow

[sunflowerfairy]

[Which was good, since Yotsuba would never forgive him for a trick like that. Maybe. Assuming she didn't forget about it or if Dia didn't apologize.]

But..if Enoch saw Daddy and Jumbo, he might feel better, since he promised to find and help them! He wouldn't worry about his promise!

"It's alright, Yotsuba. We don't care if you leave. After all, if you had left us before this whole mess, we might have actually lived. Go."

At that, Yotsuba bit her lip, but she forced herself to not cry at those words. They hurt..but she didn't want to leave Daddy or Jumbo.

Meadow

[oathshackledbird]

Yes, but Daddy and Jimbo aren't well right now, right?

[He gives Yotsuba a gentle look, patting her on the head again to try and calm her.]

You don't want them to accidentally upset Enoch the way they are upsetting you, right? It will be harder for Enoch to help if he is upset, just like it is harder for you to help when you are upset. And who knows, maybe if Daddy and Jimbo rest here a while they will feel better when you get back!

How did I forget the brackets in that post..><;;

[sunflowerfairy]

[While Yotsuba liked being patted on the head, it didn't comfort her as much as it usually would have right now. It did help a little though.]

But..if you can't hear them, then maybe Enoch can't either!

[However, the promise of having her Daddy and Jumbo back to normal again after a good rest was tantalizing, so Yotsuba thought that over a moment before nodding.]

Okay. Maybe they'll like a good rest!

"Just as long as you're not around." "Well, we will have to see her again soon, to remind her of what she did. After all, she does have a poor memory."

..Can Yotsuba hug them before we go though?

*Pats* It's okay. I didn't even notice! :-)

[oathshackledbird]

Perhaps, but sometimes it is best to not risk certain things. You really don't want to risk making Enoch sadder on accident, right? Besides, most people feel better after a good rest. Hopefully, that will apply to your daddy and Jimbo too!

[An unsure and somewhat worried look crosses Diarmuid's face.]

I don't know if you can touch them, little one. However, if you wish to try I will not stop you. Just...be careful.

Ah, alright then..^^;

[sunflowerfairy]

Oh..that's true! Enoch said that when we were practicing slinging! And Yotsuba doesn't want to make him sadder.

[Yotsuba, in contrast, smiled a little, even if that smile was much weaker than usual.]

Okay..I'll be careful!

[With that, Yotsuba would wander over and try to give Shadow Jumbo a hug before moving onto trying to hug her father's legs. Of course, she just passed through, but she didn't seem to care.]

"You don't have to hug us, Yotsuba. Just take your things and go. It's a bit too late for a separation, but that doesn't mean I want to see your face again. If we had separated, Jumbo and I might have lived. You're horrible."

Yotsuba just took the words silently as she stopped trying to hug her Daddy, looking rather melancholy. "Yotsuba will be back soon, so don't worry!"

With that, she would quickly run over to Diarmuid again and try to start climbing up his legs so that she could reach his shoulders. It was both something to help elevate her and an activity that she was doing to try and not cry.

[oathshackledbird]

[Diarmuid recognizes what she is doing. Too often his own boys would busy themselves with a flurry of activity to try and hold back or hide their own tears. He helps Yotsuba settle onto his shoulders and starts to turn to leave. However, he pauses and looks back at Yotsuba's shadows for a moment.]

I hope when next we meet you are in better moods. Yotsuba is a precious treasure and should be treated the way you are treating her. You know better than to act as you are.

[He doesn't give the shadows a chance to respond. Instead, he turns and head out of the meadow. While he's moving fast, considering how fast he can go, it's not all that fast. That way, he can still talk to Yotsuba.]

Where shall we go looking first, little one? Got any ideas?