From silent shades and the Elysian groves

[puppy_lancer]

Characters: [AU3] Lancer puppy_lancer, [AU1] Rei Ayanami terrifying, [AU7] Sola-ui marriedthebloke, and you
Setting: All around the Tower, through the week
Format: You choose!
Summary: Catch-all event log for my characters
Warnings: Angst, madness, and dying characters

Lancer

August 11-13

[Like all others marked by the shadow children, Lancer hears the voices of his loved ones, especially the two people who can be said to be his biggest regrets. Misaya and Connla were behind him, accusing him of failing, reminding him of his fault, asking him why he hadn't died in their place. And listening to them, he feels less hurt than relieved. Finally, they would blame the right person. Finally, he could be punished for his mistakes.]

[And most of all, no matter what they were saying, he's glad to see them again, even in the form of these strange illusions. He's lost so many people close to him, both old and new. So now he just wants to cling to these shadow children who talk so much like his Master and his son. Or perhaps the stress of the last few weeks had just snapped his mind.]

[The first thing he tries to do is hug them, but to his disappointment, his arms go right through their forms. Even with them at his side, he cannot embrace them and apologize.]

[Nevertheless, it doesn't dampen his mood that much. He walks through the Tower, showing them various floors that he thinks they'll like. He speaks to them like they're still their old selves. And of course, he brags to them about the package he received in the mail. In fact, he's much more cheerful and energetic than someone followed by shadow children should be.]

August 14 (floor 80)

[By this day, Lancer has lost a good deal of his energy. Every couple of steps, he yawns, stretches, or rubs at his eyes. His collar has gotten gradually paler, but he still tries to keep up a happy facade for Misaya and Connla. Especially since he's taken them to a special floor.]

...Look, Connla. There's the circus. Just don't go too close. You too, Misaya. Even if you wanna play with the guts.

['Useless. You're just trying to distract yourself.'

'He's always paid attention to the wrong things. For example, flirting with enemies while he was suppose to be fighting to save me.']

No, really. They're violent. They'd kill you.

[He's doing his best to stay away from the clowns and keeping his voice down. However, in his fatigued state, he wouldn't notice if anyone else joined him on this floor, or if the clowns would try to kill him.]

August 15-16 (floor 25)

[Lancer hates to admit it, but he's tired. Unknown to him, the color of his collar, and the color of his soul itself is becoming more and more washed out He's lain down on the grassy ground of the meadow and doesn't feel like getting up. Not even the growl of thunder in the distance can convince him that this might be a bad idea. Half of him wants to fall asleep, but the voices of the shadow children keep on waking him.]

['Are you trying to go so easily?'

'You don't deserve it.'

'Not when I died in such pain. And I wasn't able to rest in peace even after that. You know what happened to me. If only you had done your job like you were supposed to. Useless Servant.'

'Liar. Traitor. Kin-slayer. Why do you get to die peacefully after all the pain you caused?'

'You already had your chance. You chose to live like a coward instead.'

'You don't deserve the name of a hero.']

Ah...

[For the first time this whole week, it hurts to hear them talk like that. He had done everything he could to accept their accusations and move on, but they just won't stop. If anything, their words were cutting deeper and deeper into him.]

[But by now, he has no strength to argue with them. He just sighs and smiles. Maybe he does deserve some pain...]


Rei

August 11-13

[Rei wakes up to find a group of shadow children around her bed. However, she disregards them and spends her day as she would any day. First, she goes down to the cafeteria for a big meal, then up to the media room to play some games, and finally exploring the nature floors until it's dusk.]

[This continues until the thirteenth, when she finally starts to hear their whispers. Snatches of voices from her home.]

...Guys? This isn't funny.

[However, her suggestions as to whether or not the situation is funny go ignored. Throughout the day, the voices increase in volume, until at night, when she's snuggled up in her bed ready to sleep, they explode.]

[Suddenly, everyone she knows--her family, her friends, the people who had left the Tower--everyone is screaming at her, calling her a monster, telling her she has no reason to live.]

[She makes a little blanket lump out of herself and whimpers, begging them to go away.]

August 14

[Rei spends the entire day in her room. After a sleepless night, she's too tired to go outside.]

['Aw, is the monster out of energy.'

'Nobody will notice if you die, you know.'

'Right, you're not that special. You're just like the rest of us. Just like all seven of us. Just the same as all seven of us.'

'Your soul is not your own.'

'Your name is not your own.'

'We're all just copies of Yui's real daughter.'

'Nous ne sommes pas encore humains.'

'We're all so expendable. Like flowers in a flower bed--any one would do.'

'So why are you alive?'

'You were our friend. You said you would protect us.'

'But you ran. You ran and we died.']

Stop!

[And her pillow goes flying at one of the shadows. They fall silent before one male voice starts speaking.]

['I'm disappointed.']

[Her father.]

[She bursts into tears now, her characteristic smile having completely disappeared.]

['But you're still our daughter. So die and come back to us.']

[Her mother.]

...Mama.

[Slowly, her collar color and her energy are both ebbing away. She remains still, and except for a few traces of tears on her face, emotionless. Was this how that other Rei always felt?]


Sola-ui

August 11 (mailroom)

[Sola-ui stares with distaste at the photograph of her mutilated family. This is all an illusion, she tells herself. However, even with this knowledge, it's all she can do to keep from shaking and crying. She doesn't want the memory of her children to be forever linked with such gruesome images.]

[A couple shadow children stand on their tiptoes around her, as if trying to see the photo for themselves. She she shoos them away. It seems the Tower has seen an increase in strange, annoying creatures.]

I hope nobody here was responsible for this.

[She calls out to anyone who might be in the mailroom with her.]

August 12 (weight room)

[The shadow children had started speaking. It seems she couldn't have a moment to herself before their whispers echoed in her mind. While she can't make out words, the voices are familiar. If she didn't know better, she would say they were the voices of her family--Kayneth, Diarmuid, and Waver.]

[Today, she's decided to go into the weight room. While Diarmuid isn't watching her, she thinks she can manage to lift a few of the lighter weights. It would save him some time during their next training session if she got in more practice beforehand.]

[So, ignoring the whispers of the shadows, she picks up two fifteen pound dumbbells and starts doing lifting exercises with them.]

August 13 (library)

[If the whispers were annoying before, then now, when the words and voices were clear, it was even more irritating. It became harder and harder for her to ignore them, and hurt more and more when she found the familiar voices denouncing her.]

['Too busy lusting after other men to care that your own family is dead.'

'Mother, I love you and I don't want to blame you...but look what you did to us. Or perhaps it's my fault. I was never good enough. I couldn't protect anyone...'

'Mum, help me. It hurts.']

[Currently, she's sitting in the library, flipping through books as quickly and as noisily as she can to try to block out some of the voices. She's clearly distressed by now.]

August 14 (infirmary)

[She's placing bottles on the shelves of the infirmary when Kayneth's voice sounds in her head.]

['Why waste your time? These bottles will save no one.']

[The voice comes so suddenly that it shocks her. She drops the bottle and it shatters on the floor.]

['Mother, are you alright?']

[Had it been another insult, it would have been better than words of concern. This sounded like something Diarmuid could actually say...]

[Without moving from her spot, she puts her head in her hands and cries.]

August 15 (infirmary)

[Sola-ui is down at the infirmary all day today. Instead of working, though, she's lying on a bed, too tired physically and mentally to do anything but lie back and listen to the voices of her family.]

[Sometimes it feels like a nightmare, when they're all in a hurry to point out everything she does wrong. And sometimes it feels more like a beautiful dream, when they actually act like themselves. She can swear that at one point, her children even got into bed next to her, like they would when they were very young.]

['Isn't it better like this? When we're all together?']

Yes...it is...

[She mutters groggily.]

Comments

[puppy_lancer]

[He opens his mouth to answer Diarmuid when, suddenly, he notices from the corner of his eye that one of the mannequins is stepping closer. However, as soon as he looks at it, it stops in its track.]

...What do you know? These things really do move.

[oathshackledbird]

Oh?

[For a moment, he looks in the direction his brother is and then walks over to the mannequin. After giving it a hard look, he very casually knocks it over.]

It's hard to move when on your back. I suppose it's a good thing I have no intention of using any of those.

[puppy_lancer]

True, it would suck if it ran off with my clothes. How many floors would we have to chase it down then?

[He knows that it's a silly idea, but it's far better than thinking of the grim things the mannequin might do to someone distracted enough.

[oathshackledbird]

[Diarmuid laughs, looking down at the toppled mannequin.]

Not many I would hope. Surely a mannequin monster wouldn't be faster than a Lancer. If so, said Lancer might want to consider a different class...

[puppy_lancer]

Hey, maybe it could work to your favor if the class had better luck.

[He nudges the mannequin with his foot.]

Though personally, I like my current class best.

[oathshackledbird]

[Diarmuid nods after a moment of thought.]

For you , this class is best. For me...I think I would have actually been a better Saber than Lancer. If nothing else, my luck would have been better...

[puppy_lancer]

It would have been great if you were my Saber. Though...you would have had to deal with Archer all the time.

[oathshackledbird]

[Diarmuid laughs.]

Considering how my Archer was, I would take your Archer any day. He may have his faults, but at least he doesn't treat everyone like they are worthless just because they aren't him.

[puppy_lancer]

That's true. Your Archer was worse, wasn't he?

[He tsks his tongue and shakes his head.]

...But Lancelot isn't half bad.

[He leans against the table, feeling a little tired again.]

Speaking of Lancelot, we still need to play hurley. Got any idea who I can recruit for teams?

[oathshackledbird]

[Diarmuid notices his brother's tiredness and motions for him to sit down. He then grabs a something that he can start taking measurements with.]

My Archer was worse, yes, though as you know Saber, Rider and Lancelot were all better than he. It is just a shame Lancelot was summoned as a Berserker and could show us none of his true self.

[He falls silent, finishing his measurements and thinking on his brother's question at the same time.]

Perhaps Kain would join us? He keeps to himself too much and a game might help him relax some. What about Ryoji? I haven't seen him much lately. I think he's been spending time with Yukiko.

If worse comes to worse, we could always ask Waver, but....yeah...

[While Diarmuid love his Master dearly, somehow he doesn't think being good at hurley is going to be one of the man's many talents.]

[puppy_lancer]

Well, if Kain and Ryoji are strong enough to keep up, I don't see why not. Though I think Waver would do better watching the game.

[Come to think of it, he hasn't seen Ryoji around either...]

[oathshackledbird]

I don't know why they wouldn't be. Whenever I manage to to catch up with Ryoji next I will ask him. I am sure he would like to try and maybe he can get Minato or some of his other friends to come along too.

Kain I am less sure on, but I will see what he says when I see him next.

[Diarmuid suddenly laughs as he sets to work starting to cut material to make his brother's shirt.]

What do you think? Would the mercury maid be strong enough to play if Waver really wanted to be involved?

[puppy_lancer]

[He takes a moment to think.]

I'd think so. Pretty curious about how a mercury maid would handle the sport, actually.

[oathshackledbird]

It's an amusing thought to ponder anyway. I am sure it would be strong enough.

[As he talks Diarmuid works on cutting out swatches of the three brightly colored fabrics his brother had picked out before.]

My question is will he be able to react and command it fast enough for the maid to keep up. It also makes me wonder just how complex of commands he can give it. Most of what I have seen him use so far have been very simple commands, though they sometimes lead to not so simple actions.

[puppy_lancer]

You should ask him. I haven't seen him use it much, though he's certainly creative with it.

[A pause.]

Though...he says it's not to used for make-out purposes.

[oathshackledbird]

[When Diarmuid hears the second part of what his brother is saying, he nearly drops the scissors in his hand.]

Wait...what? Why were you talking to him about sex to begin with? Let alone sex involving his familiar!

[puppy_lancer]

Well, we were talking about you. Or at least I was talking about you.

[He shrugs.]

And he was thinking that I wanted to have sex with his familiar.

[oathshackledbird]

How does talking about me become you wanting to have sex with his familiar?

[Diarmuid's shocked expression becomes alarmed.]

Do you want to have sex with his familiar?

[puppy_lancer]

...No! Not when I can get a real woman!

[Lancer's face goes red.]

We were talking about maybe helping you out with Cecil and things about the rumors that went on a month or so ago. And I asked him to use his familiar to check people for scars. So, you know, I could find out who wrote a certain rumor. Apparently he thought I was thinking dirty things about Volumen.

[oathshackledbird]

Oh...

[Now it's Diarmuid's turn to blush, though he's not quite sure what exactly he's blushing about. It could be that he had assumed so wrong or it could be that his brother was talking to Waver about his feelings for Cecil.]

Did...he say much about that? About me and Cecil I mean...

[puppy_lancer]

[He shakes his head.]

Nah, not much. Sorry.

[oathshackledbird]

Don't be. It's all right.

[Far from being upset, Diarmuid seems glad to hear this.]

When I realized what had happened...that I was falling in love, I never stopped to think how he might feel about it. Would he worry that I might break my promises to him? That I might chose to no longer be his Servant? Or would he just be happy that I was happy?

[He shakes his head.]

It matters little now with her gone, but it does make me realize how foolish it was for me to look for love when I have already decided I am going back with him. It would be unfair to make someone choose between their world and their love.

Besides, I am happy serving him and being his friend. Perhaps that is all I need...

[puppy_lancer]

I don't know.

[He's of the mind that they could've figured something out.]

But if that's what makes you happy, who am I to argue?

[oathshackledbird]

[Diarmuid pauses in his work to give his brother a serious look.]

I am happy, brother. Things are still hard and I still have my doubts, but I am much happier than I was back during those first months after my arrival. You, Waver, and the rest of my friends--those who are here and those who are not any longer--managed to keep me sane long enough that I could start figuring things out.

Thank you.

[puppy_lancer]

I think it goes both ways.

[He walks over to stand close by Diarmuid, one hand on the table for support. Then, he leans his head against Diarmuid's shoulder.]

You're the one friend I have who has never gone away. Who will never go away. And I'm glad for that.