six.

[sicharia]

Characters: Claudia Hortensia & OPEN
Setting: Floor 1 (or 48, 50, 101)
Format: Brackets preferred
Summary: Returning from her dead world
Warnings: TBA

[Waking up in the Tower again is—nice. Claudia wouldn't have ever thought she would find such a thing nice, but when she opens her eyes and finds herself in the dorm room, all she feels is a dim relief. It's been days—weeks?—since she's seen another living human being, and she thinks that if she had needed to stay on that planet any longer than she had, she would have gone insane.]

[...But she doesn't really have much response other than that. On her world, she had wandered like a ghost, but now that she's here again, she doesn't feel much differently than she did there. She doesn't know what she should feel or do. So, she just does what she would normally: get breakfast.]

[Really, heading down to the cafeteria is probably the most logical decision she could make, anyway. After more than a few days in that world, she lost track of time, and she's been here long enough to know she can likely tell how long she has been gone by what's being served there. This is quicker and simpler than trying to find someone she knows, then asking.]

[The selection of food makes it immediately clear what month it must be, and numbly, she thinks she couldn't have been gone too long, in that case. With the same shell-shocked detachedness that pervades her thoughts, she takes her pancakes and moves to find a place to sit, not as alert to her surroundings as she maybe should be.]

[Around meals, she'll linger here before and after she eats, as most of the people she would like to see now will have to pass through here at some point in the day. When she isn't in the cafeteria, she can be found performing her rounds in the graveyard or skulking around Floors 50 or 101.]

Comments

[unhealing]

[Claudia often comes here to relax as much as one can here, or to read. Today, though, she doesn't seem to be doing much of either. Her expression is distracted and lost and thought as stands among the flowers hanging here, her single eye staring at the foliage without really seeing it.]

[When his voice reaches her ears, it catches her by surprise, and she starts, immediately forcing a smile onto her face as she focuses on him.]

Ah, Kirei! There you are. I'm sorry, it must have been a while.

[The apology comes automatically.]

[god_damned]

[ She doesn't look ashamed or embarrassed to see him, as if it was purposeful that they have not crossed paths, but something still rings as amiss. Her phrasing indicates more than avoidance, or simple chance that they have not crossed paths. ]

It was. [ Oddities happen often in the Tower, and there could be more than one explanation. ] Where were you?

[unhealing]

Ah... Hm. [Her hands fold together in front of herself, squeezing together uncomfortably.] I think... I was back home?

[She can't truly say with certainty, given how changed things were, but... It doesn't seem like something she's eager to discuss, but by the same token, it seems wrong to hide such from Kirei.]

[god_damned]

Home?

[ The idea strikes him as bizarre. He hasn't heard of anyone returning; he hadn't thought it possible. ]

I was told it was destroyed.

[unhealing]

It was. [She answers with an awkward kind of bluntness, not sounding upset so much as dazed as she tells him:] Everything was dead.

[god_damned]

[ His mouth suddenly seems dry.

He imagines it: a dead world. A vast wasteland of destruction. What could have caused that? Not just in one world, but across dimensions and time? ]

What did you do?

[unhealing]

Slept and prayed. [She blurts out that answer, and with it, there's a brittle-sounding laugh.] There wasn't much else I could have done.

[god_damned]

For how long?

[ He imagines her: this fragile saint, an image of pale, pure white against a backdrop of charred, black earth, that stretches for miles. ]

Could you tell?

[unhealing]

Days and nights passed like normal, if that's what you mean. I didn't... I lost track after a few days. I think the amount of time probably matches up, though, so you might be better off asking Assassin.

[With that said, she pauses, seeming to debate something. Then, voice hushed, she offers:]

There were still... I mean, it's not like there was anything to move the bodies elsewhere! So I—I tried to move the ones I found, since it seemed wrong to just leave them lying there...

[Where her fingers are laced in front of herself, they squeeze together tighter.]

[god_damned]

[ He watches her face, and his gaze lowers to her hands, as they tightly clench together, and he takes a step forward. After a moment, he rests his hand on top of hers. That is what he is expected to do in a situation like this: offer comfort. However, what is on his mind is not to reassure her, or help her forget those troubles.

He wants to know more. ]

How many where there? How many dead, and not properly put to rest?

[unhealing]

[When his hand rests over hers, she allows it, but she doesn't respond to the gesture. Instead, at his question, her gaze falls downward, focusing on his fingers rather than his face.]

It should be billions, shouldn't it? The whole world.

[Abruptly, as she speaks those words, she remembers accusatory voices ringing in her ears. The whole world, except for herself. Everyone she had known and cared for, and millions of people she had never met—]

[He chest feels pinned with a damning weight, and suddenly, it's hard to draw breath.]

[god_damned]

[ When he was told the world was destroyed, he did not think of anything left behind. It imagined the world itself being reduced to dust. Now, Claudia reports something else: the world remains, but it is rubble, and the fallen dead are very visible.

What kind of force has that much power? To conquer all lands and leave nothing but death behind? ]

That many, and you still tried to move them?

[ Of course she would: this woman would try to give last rites to the entire world. ]

[unhealing]

I'm not that strong. [Not physically, either, but that's not what she means now.] It's not like I went into buildings, and after a few days, I just... I stayed inside the church and didn't leave most of the time. But, if I saw someone just lying on the sidewalk— What else was I supposed to do?

[She can't imagine being so callous as to just leave them there.]

I—moved...

[Her voice falters. Her lips tremble slightly, and she presses them together.]

[god_damned]

[ On an instinct that is trained, rather than felt through empathy, Kirei reaches to touch her face. The other hand stays on hers, squeezing slowly.

He wants to hear it; he wants to know, and to see the reaction it has upon her. ]

Go on.

Tell me, Claudia.

[unhealing]

[When he moves to touch her face, she ducks her head aside. She shouldn't accept this much contact from him, she thinks, even as she fails to voice that objection in words.]

[When she answers his urging, her face remains turned downward.]

Well, that's— Obviously [her voice creaks], Risei would have been at the church, right? So I, I had to...

[An odd, broken little laugh bubbles up.]

[god_damned]

[ Ah.

Slowly, his hand lowers from her face again. ]

I see.

[ Should hearing his father's name alone should rise some conflict in him, much less to realize: yes, he is gone; nothing but a corpse in a dead world. But... he does not feel sorrow. ]

That is all that could be done.

[unhealing]

[For a moment, she doesn't say anything. Then, there's a tiny, sharp sniff as she pulls one hand from his, lifting it to scrub at her eye.]

I'm—sorry...

[It's not an apology for anything in particular, or it's an apology for a lot of things at once.]

[god_damned]

For what reason?

[ It's not a question meant to be reassuring, to imply how she has nothing to apologize before -- it is legitimate. He is genuinely unaware of why she would feel guilt.

He lets her pull away, and he does not push the matter. ]

[unhealing]

I don't know. [When questioned directly, she draws a blank, but that does nothing to erase the guilt constricting her chest.] Maybe I shouldn't have said anything at all.