Diarmuid Ua Duibhne (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
oathshackledbird) wrote in ![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png)
towerofanimus2014-03-14 07:17 pm
oathshackledbird) wrote in towerofanimus2014-03-14 07:17 pm
I would rather Fly than Fall...
Characters: Diarmuid Ua Duibhne (oathshackledbird) and open to anyone who wants to run into him! (Closed prompt at the end for Waver Velvet, fionnuisce. Close prompt now added for Reno, midgarhorizon , and Shion, savedbyasong !)
Setting: Room 2-16, the hallways, Room 2-04, and anywhere on the Dorm Levels/Safe floors of the Tower.
Format: Starting in prose, pick your poison after that!
Summary: Log to cover several things including the 'Tower of Jenova' event, dating from the 14th to the 23rd. (A few backdated prompts will likely be added later and, depending on the Mod Event which lasts from the 23rd to the 27th, prompts for it may be added as well.) After denying for a few days anything is wrong, Diarmuid gives in and goes looking for Waver in hopes that the magus can help cure whatever is making him feel so sick. Cue camp out/sleepover in room 2-04 with possible feverish wanderings from time to time. My apologies in advance to the other occupants of 2-04...
Warnings: Diarmuid's cap for the event is LI2, which means he will be very sick and sporting a rash after a while. While he will have mood dips and periods of negativity throughout the event, he won't be having any of the other, more severe symptoms associated with the higher levels and won't be dying. The negative emotions that are mentioned in the prompts will be less prominent during the early part of the event and get stronger as the event goes on. Specific Warnings for negative emotions, mentions of death/death wishes, things related to the flu/respiratory infections/fever, and potential mild violence and mild mentions of blood. If Diarmuid runs into any of those with higher infection levels, their threads will be marked with that character's level of infection (LI) should the thread progress to anything besides them talking. Threads with characters that have higher infection levels should be assumed to have warnings similar to those in the open mingle including mentions of body modification, violence, blood, and injury.
Note: I would like to request that if your character knows or suspects that Sephiroth is behind the illness going around, that they not say anything about that to Diarmuid at this time. I am an evil mun and am making him wait until after the event at least to find out--if he even does then.But he was just so sure Sephiroth was up to something... Thanks guys!
The Gym, 3-7 in the morning (Closed to Reno and Shion):
This meeting is long overdue. Even though the last time Diarmuid talked to Shion the boy seemed to have made great steps in better controlling his emotions and berserk outbreaks, the meeting is still necessary. So many times people discover things about themselves in this place only to lose that new information because of something happening. Diarmuid wants to make sure the new discoveries Shion has made aren't lost like that. Not when they have done so much to help the boy stabilize himself.
While he waits, Diarmuid pulls out his swords and starts doing a few simple practice strikes with them. It won't be long until Reno and Shion arrive, but it's hard for him to sit still in the gym. Especially considering he's in a pretty good mood. The ring on his finger catches his eye for a moment and his smile widens.
Okay, a really good mood...
Room 2-16, 3-14 in the morning:
As hard as he is trying to deny it, when Diarmuid wakes up feeling like he is on fire and being smothered at the same time, he can't keep doing it any longer. Somehow, someway, he is sick and not just slightly sick. Very sick. The first few days he had ignored it figuring it to be a product of his working himself too hard, the room switches, or even a bit of a recurrence of the exhaustion that had plagued him after helping to recharge the Tower...
Then Grainne had arrived and everything had just gotten worse. Literally. It's almost as if his emotional uncertainty has somehow been feeding whatever is wrong with him. He doesn't blame her at all, but it is very clear he his condition is going downhill. Today is only proof positive of that.
His thoughts drift to cursing Jason because this reminds him too much of the sickness he had heard went around the December before he arrived. Of course, it can't be Jason this time because he is dead, but might someone else have set it off instead? If the response Waver had gotten to his request is any indication, Zo is in charge this month as normal. He would never do something like this. Is Ruana still playing games behind the scenes?
The thought makes him shiver...or that just might be chills from the fever. Diarmuid tries to pull himself from the bed, but ends up collapsing instead, breaking into a fit of shivers hard enough that his vision swims and he realizes he can't just stay here. He needs to find a healer. He needs to find Waver...
To be honest, he is kind of surprised Waver hasn't found him already, but he has kept distant on the bond lately not wanting to drain his partner more than necessary. That and with Grainne arriving, Diarmuid would be lying if he didn't say he is afraid of what he might find there...or not find there as the case may be.
He tries to rise again and finally manages to get to his feet. After swaying for a moment, he stumbles to the door and into the hallway. Here's hoping Waver is actually in his room and not at the Laboratory for once. Diarmuid's not so sure he will make it that far...
Dorm hallways, 2nd Floor, 3-14 in the morning:
Everything is spinning and it's starting to make Diarmuid sick to his stomach. He's never felt this bad before, not even when he was alive. Sickness, just had avoided him. Maybe he had been lucky or maybe his father had been watching out for him. In ether event, he's not used to feeling like this. His arms wrap around his waist and he takes a deep breath trying to force himself to walk in a straight line.
It's not going so well. Hopefully, he won't run into anyone too hard...
Room 2-04, anytime on 3-14 to 3-23:
If he had more energy or will Diarmuid would probably be tossing and turning, but as it is he is just laying in Waver's bed feeling guilty. They keep trying to heal him and while it seems like it works for a while, he always gets worse again. He supposes he should be glad he's not hallucinating. That had been part of Jason's virus, hadn't it? Or...maybe he is and he just doesn't realize it. Is his brain trying to tell him just how much of a burden he is on everyone? Is that why the healing only ever holds for a while?
Dorm hallways/Safe Tower floors anytime on 3-14 to 3-23:
He slips away sometimes when they aren't watching close enough or think he's asleep. Diarmuid can't help it. As tired as he is, his mind just tells him to run and get away from them so that he's not bothering them anymore. It doesn't help that the urge grows stronger as time passes. How long until they stop leaving him alone? How long until he runs out of chances to free them from the burden he's creating?
Funny, though, he can't ever bring himself to go onto any of the really dangerous floors. That would take care of things pretty quickly, wouldn't it? So, why can't he?
Room 2-04, 3-23 Kill Switch Activation (Closed to Waver):
Perhaps the hallucinations have finally found him after all, because at the moment it feels like something is strangling him...but not strangling him in the normal manner. Instead, its like someone has wrapped their hands around his very core, pulling and crushing it. Trying to rip it away from him. The feeling grows stronger, causing a small frightened sound to slip from his lips. He's not sure what he should do. Should he pull away from Waver to make sure this doesn't affect him too? Should he reach out for him and use the strength his knows his partner will provide to help fight whatever this is?
Should he let go and just stop being a burden?
Diarmuid's exhausted mind is still pondering all this when a the pull suddenly becomes a sharp, searing yank. This time he cannot help but cry out both in pain and fear. As he does, his heart and brain finally slam into agreement. No more dancing around a decision he made long ago. No more waiting for him to consciously realize what he has already unconsciously figured out. He opens the bond and reaches out for Waver just as hard and as desperately as he can...
Help me! Please... I don't want to leave you!
oathshackledbird) and open to anyone who wants to run into him! (Closed prompt at the end for Waver Velvet, fionnuisce. Close prompt now added for Reno, midgarhorizon , and Shion, savedbyasong !)Setting: Room 2-16, the hallways, Room 2-04, and anywhere on the Dorm Levels/Safe floors of the Tower.
Format: Starting in prose, pick your poison after that!
Summary: Log to cover several things including the 'Tower of Jenova' event, dating from the 14th to the 23rd. (A few backdated prompts will likely be added later and, depending on the Mod Event which lasts from the 23rd to the 27th, prompts for it may be added as well.) After denying for a few days anything is wrong, Diarmuid gives in and goes looking for Waver in hopes that the magus can help cure whatever is making him feel so sick. Cue camp out/sleepover in room 2-04 with possible feverish wanderings from time to time. My apologies in advance to the other occupants of 2-04...
Warnings: Diarmuid's cap for the event is LI2, which means he will be very sick and sporting a rash after a while. While he will have mood dips and periods of negativity throughout the event, he won't be having any of the other, more severe symptoms associated with the higher levels and won't be dying. The negative emotions that are mentioned in the prompts will be less prominent during the early part of the event and get stronger as the event goes on. Specific Warnings for negative emotions, mentions of death/death wishes, things related to the flu/respiratory infections/fever, and potential mild violence and mild mentions of blood. If Diarmuid runs into any of those with higher infection levels, their threads will be marked with that character's level of infection (LI) should the thread progress to anything besides them talking. Threads with characters that have higher infection levels should be assumed to have warnings similar to those in the open mingle including mentions of body modification, violence, blood, and injury.
Note: I would like to request that if your character knows or suspects that Sephiroth is behind the illness going around, that they not say anything about that to Diarmuid at this time. I am an evil mun and am making him wait until after the event at least to find out--if he even does then.
The Gym, 3-7 in the morning (Closed to Reno and Shion):
This meeting is long overdue. Even though the last time Diarmuid talked to Shion the boy seemed to have made great steps in better controlling his emotions and berserk outbreaks, the meeting is still necessary. So many times people discover things about themselves in this place only to lose that new information because of something happening. Diarmuid wants to make sure the new discoveries Shion has made aren't lost like that. Not when they have done so much to help the boy stabilize himself.
While he waits, Diarmuid pulls out his swords and starts doing a few simple practice strikes with them. It won't be long until Reno and Shion arrive, but it's hard for him to sit still in the gym. Especially considering he's in a pretty good mood. The ring on his finger catches his eye for a moment and his smile widens.
Okay, a really good mood...
Room 2-16, 3-14 in the morning:
As hard as he is trying to deny it, when Diarmuid wakes up feeling like he is on fire and being smothered at the same time, he can't keep doing it any longer. Somehow, someway, he is sick and not just slightly sick. Very sick. The first few days he had ignored it figuring it to be a product of his working himself too hard, the room switches, or even a bit of a recurrence of the exhaustion that had plagued him after helping to recharge the Tower...
Then Grainne had arrived and everything had just gotten worse. Literally. It's almost as if his emotional uncertainty has somehow been feeding whatever is wrong with him. He doesn't blame her at all, but it is very clear he his condition is going downhill. Today is only proof positive of that.
His thoughts drift to cursing Jason because this reminds him too much of the sickness he had heard went around the December before he arrived. Of course, it can't be Jason this time because he is dead, but might someone else have set it off instead? If the response Waver had gotten to his request is any indication, Zo is in charge this month as normal. He would never do something like this. Is Ruana still playing games behind the scenes?
The thought makes him shiver...or that just might be chills from the fever. Diarmuid tries to pull himself from the bed, but ends up collapsing instead, breaking into a fit of shivers hard enough that his vision swims and he realizes he can't just stay here. He needs to find a healer. He needs to find Waver...
To be honest, he is kind of surprised Waver hasn't found him already, but he has kept distant on the bond lately not wanting to drain his partner more than necessary. That and with Grainne arriving, Diarmuid would be lying if he didn't say he is afraid of what he might find there...or not find there as the case may be.
He tries to rise again and finally manages to get to his feet. After swaying for a moment, he stumbles to the door and into the hallway. Here's hoping Waver is actually in his room and not at the Laboratory for once. Diarmuid's not so sure he will make it that far...
Dorm hallways, 2nd Floor, 3-14 in the morning:
Everything is spinning and it's starting to make Diarmuid sick to his stomach. He's never felt this bad before, not even when he was alive. Sickness, just had avoided him. Maybe he had been lucky or maybe his father had been watching out for him. In ether event, he's not used to feeling like this. His arms wrap around his waist and he takes a deep breath trying to force himself to walk in a straight line.
It's not going so well. Hopefully, he won't run into anyone too hard...
Room 2-04, anytime on 3-14 to 3-23:
If he had more energy or will Diarmuid would probably be tossing and turning, but as it is he is just laying in Waver's bed feeling guilty. They keep trying to heal him and while it seems like it works for a while, he always gets worse again. He supposes he should be glad he's not hallucinating. That had been part of Jason's virus, hadn't it? Or...maybe he is and he just doesn't realize it. Is his brain trying to tell him just how much of a burden he is on everyone? Is that why the healing only ever holds for a while?
Dorm hallways/Safe Tower floors anytime on 3-14 to 3-23:
He slips away sometimes when they aren't watching close enough or think he's asleep. Diarmuid can't help it. As tired as he is, his mind just tells him to run and get away from them so that he's not bothering them anymore. It doesn't help that the urge grows stronger as time passes. How long until they stop leaving him alone? How long until he runs out of chances to free them from the burden he's creating?
Funny, though, he can't ever bring himself to go onto any of the really dangerous floors. That would take care of things pretty quickly, wouldn't it? So, why can't he?
Room 2-04, 3-23 Kill Switch Activation (Closed to Waver):
Perhaps the hallucinations have finally found him after all, because at the moment it feels like something is strangling him...but not strangling him in the normal manner. Instead, its like someone has wrapped their hands around his very core, pulling and crushing it. Trying to rip it away from him. The feeling grows stronger, causing a small frightened sound to slip from his lips. He's not sure what he should do. Should he pull away from Waver to make sure this doesn't affect him too? Should he reach out for him and use the strength his knows his partner will provide to help fight whatever this is?
Should he let go and just stop being a burden?
Diarmuid's exhausted mind is still pondering all this when a the pull suddenly becomes a sharp, searing yank. This time he cannot help but cry out both in pain and fear. As he does, his heart and brain finally slam into agreement. No more dancing around a decision he made long ago. No more waiting for him to consciously realize what he has already unconsciously figured out. He opens the bond and reaches out for Waver just as hard and as desperately as he can...
Help me! Please... I don't want to leave you!
no subject
I don't know who Jason is, but if you promise to stay there I'll go get something out of the kitchen.
[Grainne pauses to look over her handiwork. There's something else she could do... quietly, she goes to her trunk and pulls out a small fragrant pouch, and brings it back to him. Tucking it inside the blanket, she completes the motion with a palm on his forehead to brush his hair back.
The pouch smells very familiar though... a soothing fragrance.]
I'll be back as fast as I can.
no subject
I will stay.
[The words are soft and it probably isn't too surprising that he falls asleep only a few seconds after saying them. But between his exhaustion, the warm blankets, and the familiar smell, he really has no chance of doing anything else.]
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She came across it when exploring and noted several plants that were poisonous but could otherwise be made into medicine. On this trip, it only takes a few moments to pick enough to make something for him, and she makes sure each sample is good enough before adding it to her pockets.
After that, she heads to the cafeteria, and wrinkles her nose at the choices. None of the meals offered seems right for somebody to eat while sick, so she rolls up her sleeves and heads into the kitchen itself.
...an hour and a very messy kitchen later, she comes back out with a bowl that, unfortunately, could be called chicken soup. At least she hadn't burned it...
Setting her pilfered tray up, she places a carefully selected amount of the herbs into a cup of steaming water, waiting for it to infuse. It would likely be cold by the time she got there, but she tries adding a little bit of the mint flavoring she found in the kitchen to make it better.
Finally, she heads to the elevator with the tray.
When she finally, finally does return to her room, the herbal infusion is mildly warm at best and the chicken soup only slightly better, since she had a large bowl over it. Setting it on her bed, she moves to sit next to him and check his condition.]
Diarmuid? I brought food...
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Sadly, he only remains like that for a few seconds before his brain wakes up enough to realize he's not at home and he is not really safe either. Nothing and no one is safe in the Tower.
He jerks, frowning, and then finally catches sight of Grainne. Seeing her removes the frown from his face, but there is concern in his eyes when he sees the food.]
Is...there still a kitchen for whoever else may need it?
no subject
I'm afraid not... but I didn't burn it this time. Can you sit up?
[Her voice quivers slightly, though she's not trying to hide it; he knows he may be too sick to really notice. His expression was so familiar... her heart swelled in pain.
This... this is such a bad idea. She should have taken him back to his own room and left him in the care of his loved ones. Everything she's done since coming here has been a bad idea, but what can she do now?]
Do you need help eating?
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...and that is proving to be a bit more challenging than it should be. After a few moments of what can only kindly be called weak flailing, he gives up and turns a pouting look in her direction.]
I think I need help...
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[Shaking her head, Grainne removes the extra blanket and sets the pouch aside.
She tries to help lift him, but with her strength gone all she can do is tug at him until she gets him leaning against the wall.
It isn't until she brings the tray over and sets it in his lap that she pauses and sighs. He's going to need feeding, she just knows it.]
You are three times the trouble the children were, combined... I think you should have the drink first, it's going to be bitter.
no subject
[Diarmuid sighs, remembering herbal medicines far too well. He might not have gotten sick much himself, but that doesn't mean he didn't see plenty of others get sick and always they complained about the taste of the medicine the most.
With a shaky hand, he reaches out for the cup determined not to have to make her feed him. Not after she had to help untwist him from the blankets. He had always wondered how the children managed that...
...he has no more idea now that he did then.]
Gah...yes, this is just as bad as they always said...
no subject
And I tried putting mint in it for you, too. You're lucky I practiced medicines so much or it would have been worse.
[She holds out the bowl for him, wishing she had brought napkins but had forgotten in her rush.]
Just... don't complain about the soup.
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[The question is automatic and he seems a little ashamed for having said something after all the work she has done. He bows his head and then takes the soup, doing his best to eat it without spilling. It's hard, though, considering how much his hands are shaking.]
Why are you doing this?
[The question is asked softly before mouthfuls of soup.]
I thought you didn't want anything to do with me...
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[Grainne sits and watches him for a moment before actually responding to the rest. It makes her uncomfortable, especially since she knows he's not in any real condition to talk about this.]
I found you wandering the hall almost delirious and refusing to go back to your room. What was I supposed to do? Just leave you there?
[The other reasons were answers she promised herself he didn't need to know.
Her expression softens slightly.]
You still think in all or nothing terms, don't you? How do you think I'd feel if I left the father of my children to wander around and fall prey to the dangers in this place?
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[There is no reason to deny a problem that Diarmuid is well aware that he has, especially if she might have some insight into how he can better stop thinking like that.]
The world is grey now. I know that more than I ever have and yet...
[He shakes his head, toying with his spoon for a moment, before setting it down so he can look up at her.]
Grainne, you severed the bond between us. You told me we have no place in each other's new lives. That is about as all or nothing as you get. When you make a break like that...
[The food and the medicine seem to be helping a little and Diarmuid is thinking more clearly now. He sets the bowl on the nightstand and then moves to try to stand from the bed, doing his best to hide the fact that, even though he is feeling stronger, he's still shaking.]
...you do leave a person. Even if they are wandering sick and delirious in a hallway. I should go...
[Would he do any differently than she had? Probably not. But he wasn't the one who killed any trace of hope for a new friendship between them...]
no subject
If you want to leave I will not stop you, but stop being a fool.
[Anger at him colored her tone with a bare hint, fighting the urge to retort.]
Do you really want to talk about this now? It is not I that severed the bond between us first, it is you. I have only made it official, and absolved you of all responsibility toward me. There is no place for me and I will not come between you and another... Master.
no subject
[There is anger in his words, but the sharpness is lost as he collapses back to sit on the edge of the bed, energy momentarily spent. Diarmuid's eyes narrow in frustration at his own weakness, before he turns his gaze back to her.]
What was I suppose to do? Never did I think I would see you again. How did you even end up on the Throne of Heroes? What wish was so strong to have brought you back as a servant?
no subject
I know. I do not blame you for moving on, and I am not angry with you for that. In fact... I am glad you have someone that you love. If he makes you happy-- You... you need to understand--
[She cuts off, freezing for a moment before grabbing up the tray and moving to the door with it, and set it outside. It's more to give her time to think carefully on what she says. Their last conversation had gone so very well, after all...]
Neither of us are the same people we knew, you are right about that. You need to understand what I did was necessary.
[Growing quiet, she does not move from in front of the door.]
As for why I became a servant... that is my own business.
no subject
I...don't even know why it picked me. I'm not a hero and I don't even need the Grail for my wish...
[His voice is soft and uncertain. To be honest, Diarmuid's not sure why he's telling her this. Maybe it will help her understand better? Of course, maybe it will just make her more worried than ever about coming between himself and his new 'Master' instead...]
I just want a chance to serve my lord until the end with no interference. That is not so much to ask. It is hardly a wish. Nothing that requires all this effort and sacrifice surely. Why was I picked when there are so many with greater wishes out there? Wishes that would help more people...
Does it just mock me? Is that it? Is that why things went so badly? Why I was betrayed yet again? Or...
[He tilts his head slightly as a thought comes to mind.]
Was it just what was needed so I could come here and have a real chance at that wish? I...don't know... I am not sure even why I am saying this...
no subject
You were betrayed?
[Taking the extra blanket, she wraps it around his shoulders, seemingly unconcerned about what his wish meant. Almost as if she had expected something like that...]
That master did not deserve you. Nor did Fionn... may he be cursed for his foolishness, and me as well.
[She presses on his shoulders, urging him to lay back against the pillow.]
My wish is a selfish one, as were all my wishes in life.
no subject
[Diarmuid knows he should fight her as she pushes him back into bed and starts tucking him in, but he can't make himself do it, and the bed suddenly feels very good under his body again.]
Again...it doesn't help for long. Nothing helps for long...
[His voice is small and maybe even a little frightened as he closes his eyes.]
Am I going to die? Is that it?
no subject
[Grainne can't help herself here, for she presses her hand against his cheek, trying to dispel his worry.]
Why don't I tell you a story?
no subject
I appreciate it, but in the end if the drain becomes to great, just letting me die might be easier. I will still come back...it will just take longer.
[Better he die than cause a lot of his friends to be weak because of him...]
A story would be nice. What one will you tell me?
[He's probably not going to be awake long enough to hear it all, but it will be a better thing to think about as he falls to sleep than death will be.]
no subject
[Grainne sits down on the floor next to him, resting her head against the wall behind her, but then jerks upright when something he said got through to her.]
What do you mean, you'll come back but it'll take longer? Why do you want to die?
no subject
Has no one told you death isn't permanent here? The process recently...changed, but it is still in place. If you die or are killed, you will be returned to life a short time later. It's not pleasant, of course, but if it will keep everyone from exhausting themselves in a place as dangerous as this one, wouldn't it be better for me just to die? There is a chance I will cured of whatever is making me sick too when I return.
[Tension fills him as he pauses a moment and realizes how bad this must sound to her. Quickly, he continues.]
I don't really want to die. There are things that happen when you die too often. It was just a thought...
no subject
We... we're immortal here?
[Not even given the oblivion death? It makes Grainne extremely nervous, for some reason. Why she hadn't committed herself to die again the second she got here and learned what she had escapes her at the moment, but knowing now it would have been futile...]
Why would they put anyone through that... to suffer death over and over?
no subject
[Or until Ruana decides she needs a snack, but Diarmuid would rather not think too hard on that right now. He settles his head against the pillow again, eyes once more falling shut.]
The Administrators...they are not like us. To most of them we are toys if not worse. Some are more...sympathetic than others, but...
[Diarmuid frowns as he fights to find a way to properly explain the complicated mess the Administrators and their motives are. When he fails, he sighs.]
...we know so little for sure. So very little...and time is almost up.
no subject
This isn't what she wished for...]
The story is something that happened when I was living in a little cottage by the sea. It was a fine place, with sheep and cattle, and every spring wildflowers bloomed on the meadow. Every winter there would be terrible weather. It was a bad winter that it happened, and such fierce winds came from the ocean I thought the little cottage would be blown away.
One night, and it was very late at night, the weather was even worse than usual. I hadn't gone to sleep yet. There came a loud crash at the door... and then a soft little knock. Well, I was astonished that there was someone out in that gale, so I opened the door and in popped this tiny white lamb.
[She sits up to check if Diarmuid is asleep yet, pausing in her story just in case.]
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