towerofanimus | the storm finally found me

Entry tags:

the storm finally found me

Characters: The Summoner and YOU
Setting: Between the thirteenth floor and the infirmary
Format: I will follow!
Summary: The Summoner really needs a hug except for the part where his ribs are broken
Warnings: Mentions of violence and blood?? Rampant self-loathing??? Various existential and emotional crises?????

[He stays where he is for a long time after the Highblood leaves, staring rather blankly into the air. He has not felt this low since he was a child. Since before he met Pyralsprite, and that thought is… absolutely hysterical to him. He has fought his whole life and it took a week and two trolls to bring him back here, where he questions every single one of his thoughts, his movements, everything. He does so much wrong, how could he have forgotten that]

[So he laughs because what the hell else is there to do. He wants nothing more then to sleep the rest of forever away, but he can’t as his body is quick to remind him. He’s coughing violently into his hand before long, unsurprised when after the fit has ended there are speckles of blood on his palm. Fuck. He wanted to skip the trip to the infirmary, but if his lungs are punctured…]

[The climb to his feet is truly agonizing, and he knows walking will be worse. There are little things in him muttering that he deserves it and he just can’t bring himself to argue with it. Yes. Of course he deserves it. Whatever. How many flights is it to the infirmary? He should’ve paid better attention in the past]

[Ah well… The first push off is the worst, and then he’s moving out of the cathedral and down the halls, one arm wrapped around himself while the other uses the wall for support. He’s tired. Let’s get this over with…]

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[ ... Okay, something is wrong here and Link is not letting it go! Well... sort of.

Obviously there's some sort of larger issue (like how Link needs to go kick Grand Highblood's ass), but that is not the point. Right now, Summoner is the concern. Maybe Link wouldn't get it, but damn if the Hylian won't TRY to. ]

... You certainly seem fine.

[ A light scoff, but that is all the snark that happens. ]

I'm sorry if we're intruding, but... we'd like to help somehow. Can't you help us understand what's bothering you, and why?

Yeah, how can you say it was fine? [It's not accusatory-- Willow's just letting her worry run away from her, and her anger at the Grand Highblood, which has yet to leave her.

She rises from the chair and comes over next to the bed again, not liking the distance now that she isn't high anymore.] Why are you being like this? You should tell us what's going on. I won't run off and pick a fight with him, if that's what you're worried about-- I figure you want to do your own fighting. Right?

[...no that's not it at all!!! But sure, okay, he'll take you up on that, especially once he realizes Willow being all close and worried like this makes him feel... guilty...? Something like that. Anyway, nods faintly]

I uh... meant that, I'm fine now? I'm not... hurt anymore. [Even if maybe he should be...] But. Yes. I would definitely rather, this be a fight that I fought on my own. [Glances to Link] You too. Please don't, go looking for him, just because of this.

[...strange that he doesn't look any happier for having uh... supposedly gotten that off his chest. :T welp]

[ ... Hm. Well truthfully Link DOES want to kick his ass still, but if Summoner would prefer it not happen, then it won't.

And that's that. Have a slight nod. Still kinda concerned here, Pupa. ]

... I can't say I won't if he hurts anyone senselessly, but it would be unfair of either myself or Willow to fight for you without your consent.

[ Link wants to ask, but... well. Not very good at social stuff and that aside what are feelings? ]

If it is something of a different nature... I am not sure if we can help him, Willow. But we can at least try to be here if you should ever need help, regardless, Summoner.

[ Really! ]

[Willow has her faults and her weak points, but one of her strengths has always been emotional intelligence, so she eyes the Summoner suspiciously as Link speaks. It's a suspicion born of earnest concern.]

Yeah, I know he doesn't get how friendship works and all, but you're right, [she says pointedly.] No matter what's going on, we're not going to judge you. We just want to be there and do what we can. I won't push, but... you don't need to hide things from us.

[...OH GOSH YOU GUYS. He feels kind of amazingly guilty with them offering to listen like this, and guilt is just... a deeply unpleasant feeling tucked up against all these other rather terrible feels. Looks away from them, jaw clenching. He almost looks like he might... say something...]

[But he just shakes his head faintly. TRUST IS HARD GUH]

It's uh... alright. I think maybe everything will, work out eventually.

[ ... Link is silent for a bit, before looking away. ]

I don't disbelieve what you are telling us, Summoner, and I am well aware of how your people's culture is, but... perhaps you could humor us and try not to be worried about asking for our help should you ever truly need it?

We won't fight your battles; that would be unfair. However... we would gladly aid you in them if you needed it, at any time we could. ... I think Willow has the same feelings... right?

[ After the small mini!speech, Link looks to Willow for some support. ]

Yeah, of course! [she agrees instantly, exchanging a glance with Link that tries to silently communicate, geez, he's stubborn.]

Whatever the problem is, if you change your mind about telling us, I won't tell you you're being silly or anything. Well, okay, I might say that, but I wouldn't hold it against you.

[Maybe if she explains what's involved in this friendship thing a little better, he'll open up.]

[lksjdlkfj looks between the two of them, and then just... glances away. His voice is sort of... dry. Conceding to incessant guilt trip if only a little]

It is... not really a uh, battle that needs fighting, I don't think. Or I guess if it is, then it is a... battle I have to fight alone, for the sake of uh... making it right, maybe. [...hm] It is... a troll thing though. I am not sure, you would really understand...?

[ There's a decent pause as he speaks, and Link thinks it over. A troll thing? Who does this remind them of?

... It might be time to actually put on the Hero Hat here and speak. What would Zelda say? She'd be better at this sort of thing, sigh. But--! They've got to try, anyway...! ]

... I concede that might be true, however... we can't understand if your people don't help us to do that, just like you would not understand our customs or ways, or those of the humans.

[ Link... hopes that makes sense! Okay, they're not great with this sort of thing, but... maybe if Link puts this into perspective a little, and explains that they're not really trying to butt in, they're just concerned and want to UNDERSTAND, then he'll open up?

Okay... what example can they use...? ... Hyrule, maybe? ]

Where I am from, three different races and many others exist together without any problem, even though there has been warring, they have come to terms with one another under a banner of peace, despite the differences in their cultures. They seek to understand each other as best as they can.

That... is all, I think. I have a friend [ Darunia, heh--the proud Goron Chief. ] who is like that. He believes his people should keep to their problems, and I respect that, but that doesn't mean I cannot at least try to understand the problem... and I won't be able to, without your help.

This... this all said, I don't want to force you to feel uncomfortable, so I apologize if I am.

Edited 2012-02-05 01:44 (UTC)

Yeah, I interact with other races all the time at home, [Willow agrees wholeheartedly.] Sometimes it doesn't make any sense to me, but it kinda... doesn't have to, I think? The important part is being there for you.

Plus, I'm starting to think I know what's going on here, anyway. [She gives him a suspicious look, because she's starting to put two and two together.]

Did you have a hate date with the Grand Highblood, but he forgot to kiss you good night, or something?

[............for god's sake Willow]

[FOR GOD'S SAKE. He was actually maybe going to say something after Link's whole appeal for multicultural misunderstanding... and then... lord]

[Gives her this kind of long... blank look]

No. That is, not even close, to the thing that happened.

[ PFFF WHAT.... Goddesses above, what is even going on here.

That is NOT what Link thought the case happened to be, so uh. Going silent here. Willow seems to know what she's talking about!

Link will just stare blankly. Dualscar did explain some of it, but...

...

This is Link's pokerface. ]

No, I think I am pretty close. [She doesn't back down, in fact gives him a flat look, or nearly flat. She really is being pushy out of concern, not entitlement.]

Every time I see you, you've fought with him recently. If he was just a regular enemy, wouldn't you avoid him, or-- or be done with it? How is coming back for more every time not hate-flirty?

[Based on her understanding of hate-flirty, at least, from how Eridan had spoken of Sollux. But Willow's strength was with relationships, particularly romance, so shifting her idea of what was supposed to happen in regular romance to the spectrum of hatemance made things relatively clear to her. She thought she was right, anyway.]

[...squints at her. But okay, maybe he is blushing faintly, though a second later he reaches up to rub sort of tiredly at his face and... hide that nonsense. THIS IS EMBARRASSING WILLOW SHUT UP]

It's over now, okay? [...hnnn ); He doesn't want it to be done but... he's just really lost about how to fix this. Or if he even can fix it? Hell, he doesn't really know what it even is! It's not like any kismesis he's ever been in though] Whatever it was. It's done.

[ Letting you take over now, Willow, since... Link has no idea on how to handle romance.

Poker face is slipping though, because it seems sort of like you're being an idiot, Summoner. ]

[It's okay, Link, Willow's got this. She knows romance, and she sees that blush, even if it is.... brown.

She would reach out to take his hand and be supportive, but he's looking like he wants his space, so Willow just melts into sympathy and shifts in place.] Are you sure? Because you... kind of look like you don't want it to be over.

And I'm not judging! [she hastens to add.] He might be an asshole, but I want you to be happy. Hate-happy? Whatever.

Edited 2012-02-07 05:32 (UTC)

[mrrr... conflicting feelings. On the one hand he... really really doesn't want it to be over. On the other... the idea of the Highblood as his kismesis...? Is kind of horrifying??? He only has really terrible memories associated with that quadrant, and none of them are anything like what it is like being around that man]

[Frowns quietly, dropping his hand now that the blush has faded again. Twiddly... fingers... Help, he doesn't know what he's doing]

I'm uh... not really sure, what to do... I guess.

[ ... Yeah, she can't help herself. She reaches out and takes one of his hands in her own, gently, more lightly placing hers over his than anything. She does this with a quick look to his expression to make sure it's alright.]

It's all kind of a mess, huh? Do you want to be with him, as kismesis?

[Follows their hands with his eyes, giving her a sort of... unsure look when she meets his eyes. But he doesn't protest, so...]

Ummm... no, I. Don't think so...? [...feelings are hard. Sigh. He doesn't even know how to classify his Feelings on the subject of the Highblood] This doesn't really... feel like it has, in the past... But it's not pity. [Little, distressed huff] I don't know.

It sounds like it's too recent for you to really know how you feel yet, [she says sympathetically.] Give yourself some time.

But you know that if... it does go in that direction, you're not supposed to actually kill each other, right? Cause even I know that, so you must have to, but you look more like you don't. [Willow is a lot more comfortable being supporto-worried girl than scolding frantic healing girl, so her worry comes out openly, unreserved but not pressuring.]

[Kind of... squints a little and glances off to the side, watching Link out of the corner of his eye for a second. Yeah. Time sounds good. He can definitely put this off... Even if that really doesn't... feel like the right thing to do. It's the best advice he's gotten so far, so he might as well try that first]

[Still, at her comment about killing each other he... smiles faintly. It's not an especially nice smile, sort of thin and mean, and it fades a second later as he lets his gaze return to her. Sounds... weirdly earnest?? Like, 'oh is that where we fucked up cause I wasn't sure']

I already, killed him once. Actually...

[Putting it off a little so that he has time to process is what she's getting at. Feelings must be running really high right now if he--

Killed him??] You killed him?! [Staring at him and not liking that smile.] No, bad! No killing! I mean, unless you had to, but you can't be getting into a-- a hate thing if you're going to be killing each other!

Edited 2012-02-11 22:47 (UTC)

[...lkjsdfkjlj looks a little startled at her. Kind of extreme. Reaction there!!! It's just murder Willow what's your problem gosh!]

Uh. Yes. I imagine if that. [...glances off to the side, uncomfortable, then back to her. He is incredibly disconcerted with the idea of willingly starting a kismesis, at all, much less with the Highblood...] Ever became a thing, I would try to avoid it. When possible. Besides, it was a uh... rather surreal experience anyway. [Not one he really wants to repeat? His head had kind of gone to a scary place there for a little bit]

It's a lot more than surreal. You can't perpetuate something like that, Summoner.

I may not be entirely clear on how this is supposed to work, but I know what Eridan's face was like when he was talking about Sollux, and it's not like this. If you're not going to try to be his kismesis, you shouldn't be playing around with him. It means he's an enemy and you need to treat him that way.

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I DID, IT WAS LOVELY SLEEP :3

excellent 8>

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WE'RE GOING TO GO CRAZY AND ORDER-LESS HERE, OKAY

OKAY o7

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