420 ♑ [four-hundred twentieth honk]

[hystericull]

Characters: Gamzee and YOU!
Setting: Floors 11 and 22, but he's wandering, so anywhere!
Format: Action is preferred but I'll match.
Summary: OH LOOK AT THE DATE TODAY GUESS WHO'S HAVING A BIG OL' CELEBRATION!? Of course, he knows not why the date is so relevant, but Gamzee has always been fond of those three little numbers. There is pie, and lots of it and whoever happens to interact with him is getting their celebratory zone on, no ifs, ands, or buts.
Warning: STONED CLOWNS AND STONED ANYONE WHO COMES NEAR HIM! And if you don't want your character high as a kite and seeing the most pimpest of motherfucking miracles, that's okay, too. I GUESS!!! Also, Gamzee's vulgar language always.






Floor Eleven

[The wall-less, lake-filled rainbow room. Why had Gamzee not found this floor sooner!? It was abso-fucking-lutely the dopest motherfucking place for any brother to up and all get his chill on. The magnificence of nature at its finest was slightly flawed by the numerous pie tins scattered around this sprawled-out troll. Their neon-green substance varied in completion; some entirely consumed, others half-full (never half-empty!), and other still untouched. Soon enough.

It was hard to tell if Gamzee was sleeping or not. His eyes were open, if only just, staring blithely up at the numerous rainbows crossing over what would be the ceiling of this room (if it had a ceiling), a stupid smile plastered all over his painted face. There were probably copious amounts of drool, as well, but who would dare look close enough to find out?

At some point, sometime, he'd made a flower crown for himself. It hung carelessly from one horn, tumbling over the grass underneath him as he lay down near the lake's edge. This was beautiful. Life was beautiful and perfect and this Tower was full of miracles. All of the people he met were miracles, this floor was a miracle, the oneness of everything in the tower was a miracle. It was all so apparent, now that he'd taken the time out to properly slam a few pies.

He sighed absently, fondly, tipping his head back slightly to marvel at more of the rainbows stretching out above him and lifting slow fingerfuls of slime from the tin of his stomach to his lips. Sometimes he got it in his mouth, sometimes not. That's all right. Things just happened the way they were all meant to happen, no motherfucking sweat about none of that shit.]

Floor Twenty-Two

[If you happen to run into Gamzee in the art gallery, you'll grow very tired of observing him. He seems to be rooted in front of a painting, slopping slime everywhere as he eats it, focused on the subtle intricacies and hidden meanings in each piece that captures his attention. Which happens to be quite a few of them.

The colors in this one, man. The colors. And the swirls. How do they even do that?

His disgusting teeth and gums are clearly visible as he gawks, droopy-eyed and slack-jawed in front of each work of art, not even moving his head when he takes another swallow of pie.]

Anywhere Else

[Got a better idea? Gamzee's meandering around in a sopor stupor all day. Wherever your character happens to be, he's likely to run in to them, pie in hand. Faygo will probably be provided, but don't expect it to come without a price! Just leave your desired setting in the subject line and I'll happily follow suit.]

Comments

[chronomancer]

Pretty neat, yeah.

[Eridan is well versed in diplomatically agreeing with the crazy person in the room. The grin is lazy, though. A touch sincere. He does like Gamzee, actually. He's a chill dude. Oh, sorry, chill motherfucker.]

[hystericull]

[There's a long moment of silence as Gamzee contemplates the wonders before his eyes. They fall dangerously close to shut, but the occasional blink could be seen. After a while, he pipes up again. He'd been staring at the sunny sky for longer than he should have been.]

Been good. Better. Uhhh...

[Please excuse him while he tries to talk.]

With the crazy light. Don't all hurt up what's as... fuckin' bad as it did.

[He turns his head slowly, opening his eyes just a little bit more so he could glance up at Eridan, silly smile still on his face.]

Usually got them motherfuckers you gave in me. ...Shady dudes.

[He squints again, but doesn't break eye contact.]

...Think I all been lookin' on the miracles too motherfucking long.

[chronomancer]

Or the pies.

[Eridan snickered.]

Might had too much pie, too.

[hystericull]

Heh, heh heh, never too much pie, motherfucker.

[Well, that was maybe a tiny lie. The moment your load gaper was filled with enough slime to rival your 'coon is probably a sign that you'd had too much. It was... not a very pleasant experience, and unfortunately one Gamzee had had more than once. He nudged the pie tin in Eridan's direction, suddenly not wanting another bite.]

Be all a good little jadebro and, like... all motherfuckin' help a brother out with the shit? We ain't kicked up at a chill zone what's in too motherfucking long, you and me.

[chronomancer]

Too much 'a anythin' is bad for you.

[Eridan eyed the offered tin a little dubiously. He wasn't really in a hurry for an encore to their last performance. He snorted, running a finger over the rim of the tin. He offered Gamzee the wryest smile at his disposal.]

Didn't know you liked gettin' puked on so much, Gam.

[hystericull]

[Oh, he was gonna talk about this now? Kid had been buried under a mound of mortification ever since the incident. About time he relaxed about it. Gamzee couldn't offer much of a mirror for Eridan's expression in this sleepy state, but he'd try to anyway.]

Small price to fuckin' pay.

[chronomancer]

...I'll keep that in mind.

[He shook his head, putting the tin away from Gamzee, by his own side.]

But you're right, we haven't chilled in a while. It's been... a little hectic.

[Unconsciously, he rubs the shoulder where until a while ago, he'd nursed a stump. He's got his arm back now, but he'd much rather not talk about it.]

[hystericull]

[Rather not talk about it, you say? That is an unspoken cue for Gamzee to get Nosy As Hell.]

Yeah?

What crazy noise a motherfucker all be gettin' himself up in as of fuckin' lates, yo?

[If he were a little more together, he'd probably notice that Eridan was +1 limb. But, when has he ever been observant?]

[chronomancer]

Oh. Just... you know, stuff.

[He shrugged again. He snorts, voice turning dry.]

...dying.

[hystericull]

[The grin comes effortlessly now, somewhere in the vicinity of fond exasperation.]

You got a fuckin' knack for kickin' the shit all out, little bro.

[And if grinning wasn't inappropriate enough, have a chuckle.]

What you all do to make the doom and motherfucking gloom nip at them green fuckin' ankles of yours all the motherfuckin' time, huh?

[chronomancer]

[Eridan scoffed and reached a hand to flick one of Gamzee's horns.]

I didn't doom myself, okay, I died-died. Like, actual me.

[A snort.]

And I told you, I don't do anything, these kind of things just... happen to me.

[hystericull]

HONK!!!

[Holy motherfuck, motherfucker! Zinging little shock shot straight all through the Swiss cheese of his pan when he got rapped on the horn like that. He pawed at his head to try and slow his spinning eyeballs, looking like a startled, scolded grub.

After a while, his lookstubs stop twirling and Eridan's words finally settle on him. A smirk.]

Think I all be actually gettin' up on some remembering of this shit. I all was to saying like, guess it all up and fuckin' does, 'cause you keep runnin' into this motherfucker.

[chronomancer]

[Eridan chuckled, amused despite it all. He shrugged a little, then arched both eyebrows behind his sunglasses.]

Don't say that. You don't "happen" to me the same way the usual manner 'a gruesome death does. I think.

[He squinted at Gamzee in an exaggerated manner, clearly playing.]

Do you?

[hystericull]

[A chuckle.]

Let's see...

[Gamzee swiped another fingerful of pie, obviously over his earlier bout of slimesickness. After a boggling round of pupil-dilation, he began to roll around in the grass, counting off a checklist on his skinny fingers.]

One! Be getting up in places you all motherfuckin' were thinkin' on bein' Gamzee-free. Ain't all gettin' your suspect on of a motherfucker bein' all up where he be and then that motherfucker's just there all with a big fuckin' honk or two.

[Another laugh.]

Two! Make you make that face you all make where your motherfuckin' mouth does all the straight line thing-- yeah, that one! Hahahaha! Brother do that all the fucking time when he get all up and talkin' 'bout the crazy death noise.

...Two! Gamzee and death make a bro zonk his shit the motherfuck out, wake up not all knowin' proper what's way's up and all what the motherfuck up and went down before said motherfucking zonking!

[He's been laughing to himself since he started, growing more amused with each bullet in the list. He keeps having to go back through his fingers because he's losing his place in the numbers.]

Five...!

[Can't get to five, he's laughing too hard. Someone had one bite too many of the green stuff.]

[chronomancer]

You forgot four.

[And three, but he's feeling charitable. Eridan arched an eyebrow at Gamzee, face properly deadpan.]

Not really convinced it's the same thing at all, Gam. Mainly because you don't see me running in the opposite direction when you "happen" to me, do you?

[hystericull]

[Gamzee stopped laughing abruptly. He was on his stomach now, snapping his head up and propping himself up on his elbows to stare intensely at the boy in front of him.]

That.

[STARE.]

Be only 'cause... all of one [Holding up a knobby finger.] motherfucking reason, brother.

[Nope, he was losing face. Gamzee's stern frown faltered for a second. It was obvious he was trying very hard not to collapse into laughter again. The finger angled slightly to point at the pie tin Eridan had pulled next to him.]

I got... the motherfuckin' good stuff.

[chronomancer]

[Eridan held his breath in surprise as Gamzee's laugh stopped abruptly, and unconsciously leaned in to listen to his words... but of course, by the time Gamzee cracked, so had Eridan. He snickered, biting the inside of his lip to keep from laughing openly. Instead, he chuckled wryly at the whole affair.

Trust Gamzee to be himself...]

[hystericull]

[Oh, jeez. Seeing Eridan start to laugh just erased all hope of Gamzee keeping it under control. Even if the jadeblood was trying to stifle his own amusement, that only seemed to make everything funnier.]

Ha... hahaha... hahahahahahahahahahonkhonkhonkhonk!!!

[He reached an arm out, seizing the closest thing for support (which happened to be Eridan's shin) and burying his head in his upper arm to help quell the laughter. It didn't help.]

[chronomancer]

[Oh god, he was honking. He was honking. Eridan's chuckles broke into real laughter, taking its cue from Gamzee's. This was so ridiculous, dear god. And he hadn't even had a drop of sopor. Yet.]

Yeah. Ah. The best stuff, I see.

[He thought talking would get the laughter under control, but the smartass remark only managed to make him laugh some more.]

gamzeelaughingalonewithpie.gif

[hystericull]

[Gamzee laughed until his head and jaw and sides hurt, until he ran out of air and was reduced to a curled-up ball at Eridan's shins. It was nice, having someone to laugh with. Laughing by yourself was fun, too, but being able to crack open a stick-in-the-mud like Eridan made everything just hilarious.

When he'd finally regained some air in his lungs, he wiped the tears from below his eyes, revealing patches of purple cheeks from underneath his paint in the process.]

Yeah... yeah, you all see motherfuckin' right, Jadebro.

[A few stray laughs escaped. He was done now, swear it!]

But you ain't up and motherfucking feelin' it, you know what the fuck I'm sayin'?

[He was grinning again, nudging the tin with his sneaker.]

eridanfacepalmingforever.gif

[chronomancer]

[Eridan blinked a little, laughter dying out slowly, as he took deep breaths. God, laughing hurt, when you weren't used to doing it much. He sniffed a little, rubbing his nose with the back of a hand as he looked down at Gamzee dubiously.]

...well, no, not yet. But there lies the road to projectile vomitin' too, and I ain't sure I'm ready to feel that again.

[Plus... the hangover. Jesus fuck, that hangover had been hell.]

gamzeepushinghallucinogens.gif

[hystericull]

Well...

[Still grinning, he sat up - which took a considerable about of effort, given the fact that as soon as he began to go vertical, his pan slid around his skull like it wasn't tied down, and he got so very, very woozy.]

Urghhh...

[Hang on, give him a second to realign his vision. And hold his head for a little bit.]

We know...

[Oh lord was the world at an entirely different angle now. He crossed his legs to match Eridan's position, although his didn't quite fit as neatly together as the smaller troll's did.]

We all fuckin' know how much a bro can down 'fore he get all losin' his motherfucking grubsauce, now.

And, uhh...

Sorta helps if a brother stop eatin' the shit when he first start to get the sick noise in his belly.

[Eridan had pretty much annihilated that pie when they'd first shared one. If Gamzee were more responsible, he would have moderated his intake. By the way, he still wasn't responsible. They'd probably have a repeat performance if Eridan wasn't going to be the one exercising self control.]

eridansfeelingsareconfused.gif

[chronomancer]

...really?

[And you didn't tell him this before? He's hurt. He eyes the pie dubiously. He eyes Gamzee twice as dubiously.]

dontmakehimlaughagain.gif

[hystericull]

Hahahaha!

[No, please don't make him start again.]

For fuckin' real, yo.

[He spots Eridan eyeing the pie, then eyeing him, then back to the pie. It was like a fucking Old Spice commercial up in here. When Eridan looked back at him, Gamzee playfully raised a challenging brow.]

Yeahhhh...?

herelemmepunchyouinthefeelsagain.gif

[chronomancer]

[Eridan looks dubious, biting the inside of his lower lip.]

...we're friends, right, Gam?