[OPEN] you waste your time with hate and regret

[chronomancer]

Characters: Jade!Eridan Ampora('s half dead carcass) and YOU.
Setting: Floor 12.
Format: Action, but I'll match you.
Summary: Nobody told Eridan sleeping in this cold is a bad, bad idea. What did you expect from him? He knows how to survive extreme heat, not extreme cold.
Warnings: Jadeblood popcicles. Jadeblood popcicles for everyone. Also Eridan sliding down the slippery slope of murderously batshit crazy, yay.

[Watching the universes ending and stars imploding and the whole thing... it's rather soothing. Sort of. Eridan was in dire need of soothing things, to put his mind back together. He'd intended to maybe sit there for a couple hours, watching the stars dying, and trying to calm himself down from an abrupt, nonsensical rage that even he could tell was irrational. He'd been pushing down a bubble of hysteria for the better part of four days now, mostly because hysteria meant bad, bad things for all involved, but maybe if he went at it slowly, it wouldn't be so bad. Because meltdowns totally work that way, obviously. Though even he had to admit that he couldn't keep on pretending everything was right and peachy. Putting on a smile and going through the motions was getting almost physically painful, but he didn't want anyone to get hurt. (And of course, being a responsible troll and asking Jade for a feelings jam was not an idea that occurred to him, either, because what is doing the right thing, haha, you must have confused him for someone else, Eridan Ampora never does the right thing unless Paradox Space has him at metaphorical gun point about it.)

Eridan watched the cycles of destruction repeat over and over again, while he tried to put order to the mess that is his head, but it wasn't long before he started feeling sleepy instead. Not really knowing any better, and given the alternative was thinking more about Rei and such, he started nodding off, fueled by the cold.

Which is why you'll find him tucked away in a corner of the room, face buried into his knees, arms around his ankles and limbs already stiff. The sleeves of that jacket have been brutalized already, but hey. At least there isn't a single bloodstain on this floor.

Yet.]

Comments

[reddeadvirtuoso]

[Oh. He was just asleep.

Jade decided that gave her full cause to turn down the worry at least a little bit, and so pulled back her foot and gave Eridan a good solid kick in the side of his leg to get him to wake up.

Come on dumbass, this was definitely not the opportune sleeping spot.]

[chronomancer]

[Eridan whines in retaliation to that kick, though rather than flail, he just jerks away, half heartedly swatting a hand at Jade. Yeah, someone's no longer in full control of their body, yay.]

[reddeadvirtuoso]

Eri, come on...!

[Her only slight inflection made it sound like she was getting annoyed, but really it was more worry again.] If you need to take a doze, you'd be better off sleeping in an oven at this rate.

[chronomancer]

...five more minutes.

[This is, legit, a thing he just said. Excuse him while he tries to go back to sleep.]

[reddeadvirtuoso]

[Oh fuck you man. She stared at him for a moment as she sniffled.]

Fuck no man, get your ass up before it freezes to the floor.

[chronomancer]

Do I have to?

[Behold, a face without sunglasses and all the sleepiness in the world on it. Pause.]

You're sick.

[Because this is the important thing right now.]

[reddeadvirtuoso]

[She'd insult you're priorities, but she's also thinking about how weird you look without your sunglasses, so that'd just be hypocritical at this point.]

It's just a cold. My immune system couldn't handle the cool combination of my sweet nuances and the icy temperature.

[Whatever that totally wasn't the point right now, so she's gonna step over and start yanking on his arm to get him to stand up.] Yes you have to.

[chronomancer]

Ow, ow, ow, okay. No need to try and tear it off.

[Never mind that she wasn't really pulling that hard, it just felt that way. He frowns, moving sluggishly as he tries to stand up again.]

Done with the fucking armless thing, honest.

[Muttering to himself, don't mind him if he doesn't make much sense.]

Plus, you wouldn't shoot me.

[reddeadvirtuoso]

[At least she was willing to stop pulling and make sure he was standing up soundly and not falling back over or something like that. So that was good!

Though there was a good bit of staring at him while he was muttering like a mad person.] Dude. You're not a werewolf nor an actual zombie. What's up with you?

[chronomancer]

Nothin'.

[This is the worst lie he's ever told. Not just because just about everything is wrong with him right now, but because most of his lies are usually even a tiny bit convincing. Excuse him while he leans against the wall a bit and scowls.]

[reddeadvirtuoso]

[Dead. Pan.]

Right, and in the mean time I'll go look at the ice green-ness of the sky today and try to cool off from this raging heatwave.

[Sniffle.]

[chronomancer]

Good, okay.

[Yeah, he didn't really register that, because he's agreeing like he's expecting Jade to leave. Good.]

You do that.

[It's a bad sign when Eridan can't grasp the nuances of a deadpan, man.]

[reddeadvirtuoso]

[No, it's a bad sign when Eridan lets her do stupidly irresponsible things. It's a dangerously awful sign when he can't comprehend deadpan and sarcasm. She's full on frowning, but it's kind of hard to notice since her scarf was still covering her mouth.]

Dude, you need to get to the infirmary or something, 'cause I'm pretty sure you're more sick than me right now.

[chronomancer]

I'm fine.

[No, he's not. And the conflicting urges - to push her away or to pull her in until he's trying to crawl into her bones - are not helping the already tenuous hold he has on himself. He licks his lips, suddenly terrified, pressing his back against the wall.]

I'm fine, I just. I need...

[What does he even need and what could possibly make this better?]

I need a nap, maybe, that's all. Just. Thinking too hard, haha.

[Yeah, that laugh ain't pitiful at all, of course not. I'm sorry, Jade, your luvdisc seems to be falling to pieces right in front of your eyes. What do.]

[reddeadvirtuoso]

[Admittedly, she has no idea how to handle this as a moirail properly should-- which is basically precisely the reason she uses stupid names for this stuff, but-- well damn if she can't at least try.]

Bro, I think you need more than a nap.

[She took a step forward and reached out to touch his arm again to make sure he didn't fall against the wall, only this time noticing how freakishly cold he felt. Infirmary, probably still a good idea.] Somethin' happen...?

[chronomancer]

[Breathe, Eridan. Breathe. You know this shit. Oh fuck, stop talking to yourself. Thinking to yourself. That's not a good habit, you know what happens when you do.[

I'm fine.

[He shivers, when she grabs his arm, but at least from her he doesn't recoil. He's still tense, though, like a coiled spring. Cold and tense is not a good combination, and he keeps wanting to slide down the wall and go back to sleep. And then maybe not wake up again, but still. When she asks, he opens his mouth to lie and his stomach turns, churning unpleasantly. He swallows hard.]

I don't want to talk about it.

[He sounds hoarse and small, because he knows he should talk about it, at least with her, but he's scared of what'll happen when he does, and if he gets angry and takes it out on her? What then? Or. Or if she sees sense and realizes she doesn't want to deal with this shit. And he's scared and he's cold and deep down he's getting worked up.]

[reddeadvirtuoso]

[No sliding down the wall for him, because she sure as hell wasn't letting go of his arm now, even if her hang was about twice more cold now than it was before.

Her brow furrowed.] Isn't it my job for you to talk to me about it this kinda shit? 'Cuz even if you're not going to the infirmary, I'm sure as hell not leaving you alone.

[chronomancer]

[Eridan made a noise of frustration that came out close to a snarl and a snap of teeth, looking almost threatening before he crumbled a little and that arm she's holding, folds so that his hand can go and sink his claws into his other arm. Like he wants to leg go and let loose, but at the same time can't, won't, because she's holding him back. He folded back into himself, aggression travelling well-traveled roads and shifting inwards, because it sure as hell couldn't go outwards.

Fucked up as he was, he still couldn't hurt her.]

I'm sorry.

[Yeah, just. Let him be as miserable as he's ever been.]

[reddeadvirtuoso]

[It was hard to lie to herself that the almost-snarl scared her a bit; but then, there were a lot more things that scared her than she cared to admit, and in the end, Jade usually ignored them anyway. Just like right now.

Carefully but steadily, Jade moved closer, releasing her grip on his arm only to weave both her arms under his shoulders and bury herself in his chest, in a tight and cautious hug. He was way more cold than she had previously thought, and she was still sniffling behind her scarf from the flu, but his cold stature was almost a relief for the raging fever in her head.]

'Snothing to apologize for, dingus.

[chronomancer]

[Eridan melted into that hug, wrapping his arms around her and burying his face into her hair. He clung to her, desperately, rasping a quiet, almost sob somewhere in the back of his throat.]

I do, I do, I'm the worst moirail, I'm sorry.

[reddeadvirtuoso]

[She was still a bit too awkward to do anything more than cling to him, but she sure kept on clinging; as much to try and help him and to help herself.]

You didn't do anything wrong. Y'just gotta stop beating yourself up over all this stuff.

[chronomancer]

[He makes little distress noises at that, slowly quieting down even as he continues to shake.

And then, very, very quietly, in the most hoarse, broken voice:]

I killed Rei.

[reddeadvirtuoso]

[Jade couldn't claim to know who Rei was, but the words "I killed" followed by a name was rarely a positive thing.

She released the hug just slightly, not pulling away from the news, but simply getting a bit loose so that she could look him in the face again. And, because he was kind of y'know ridiculous freezing cold. Not that the outside was much warmer though.

When she spoke, there was more concern in her voice than she'd normally allow.] What happened...?

[chronomancer]

[His eyes slide close, even as he slowly lets himself bend to his knees, burying his face into her shirt.

And then he just cried.]

[reddeadvirtuoso]

[The reaction was....surprising. And for a moment she's just kind of shocked, and worried, and her stomach's starting to churn from anxiousness and she just reflected on how much that sucked. But once that moment passed, she carefully kneeled down next to him, moving his head back to her shoulder and hugging him tightly once more.]

Sh-Shhhhh... come on man, it'll be OK...

[Not really a promise she could make, but it was the best she could think to do right now.]