Diarmuid Ua Duibhne (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
oathshackledbird) wrote in ![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png)
towerofanimus2013-05-16 11:21 pm
oathshackledbird) wrote in towerofanimus2013-05-16 11:21 pm
A bridge can still be built, while the bitter waters are flowing beneath...
Characters: Diarmuid and whoever else runs into him! Closed sections for Tohko Amano (tohko_amano ) and Waver Velvet (fionnuisce ) & Sephiroth (pinnaculum ).
Setting: Floor 100, 39 (the Gym), 25 (the Meadow), 3 (the Library), and others.
Format: Any!
Summary: Diarmuid takes care of some loose ends, moves ahead some projects, and does some much needed thinking.
Warnings: None right now. Will update if that changes.
Note: Title quote credit to Anthony Liccione.
Floor 100 (Open):
For a long time after he started spending time here, Diarmuid had spent most of his time near the image of his house losing hours playing a game between himself and the floor seeing how well it actually had recreated the place he loved so much. After a while, though, he had started to move out and away from the house, through the yard, passed the training grounds and the dog kennels, and finally to the forest that had stood guard behind his house. Diarmuid had been disappointed to find that the illusion stopped a few feet into the treeline and thus short of where the stream had flowed, but it did go far enough back to include one of his favorite thinking spots from his first life.
The spot itself is nothing fancy. Just a small clearing with two trees leaning in toward each other shading a large rock with their branches. Of course, here he cannot sit upon or lean against the rock as he had so often done in the past, but he has found the perfect place to sit so that he can still imagine that is what he is doing. And so, it is here near the treeline that he has taken to sitting to think once he had lost the ability to do so in his room.
It seems to Diarmuid that almost all he has done lately is think, but at the same time, he has so much to think about. So much has happened to him so quickly over the last few months that he is honestly surprised he can still function. Nothing during his first life had prepared him for anything like this--this constant opening of old wounds and giving of new ones before the first had any time to heal. It is almost like the nightmare that had started when his master had ordered him to kill himself just had never ended.
Yet, there are bright points. A great many of them and that is why Diarmuid is so determined to finally get his mind straightened out. It will take time, he knows, but it will also take him finally forcing himself to believe so many of the things he has realized through his talks with others. Things Diarmuid has asked others to do, but always seems to forget to ask himself to do.
He has told both Cecil and Waver that he knows he holds himself to higher standards than others and really needs to stop. Everyone is equal in the tower. Everyone has had their souls taken from their bodies and placed into false forms. There is no reason for him to expect so much more from himself especially when expecting so much only sets him up for failure.
He has told Suzaku, Ryoji, and Mami that everyone makes mistakes and that making them doesn't make them any less of a person. As long as they don't stop fighting and don't let the mistakes beat them, there is always a chance to find forgiveness.
He has told Yata that 'knight' is just a label. It doesn't matter if others believe that is what you are as long as you know what you are in your heart and act to serve the best way you can.
And he has told his brother and Hidetoshi that he knows he is in a rut of negative feelings. He just has to find his way out.
That is why Diarmuid is spending so much time here just thinking and watching the illusionary trees move in the breeze. Sometimes he's meditating on things using a technique that Oisin taught him so very long ago. Sometimes he has actually dozed off during his thoughts and sometimes, soft singing in ancient Gaelic can be heard drifting across the floor as he unconsciously releases his emotions in a way that so many around him did when he was young.
Floor 25 (Closed to Tohko,tohko_amano ):
He picked the meadow as the place where he wanted to meet with Tohko because it is one of the few floors where it isn't unusual for people to meet and talk. It is safe, large enough that several groups can be talking in it without bothering each other, and also has plenty of room away from the walls and the prying eyes of any devices the Administrators might be using to spy on them. With the loss of the sauna as a place to safely discuss things like the resistance--he has seen the units working there and guessed that some of the information that had been discovered by Jason's little ploy must have been about the lack of cameras on that floor--they've had to make due the best they can.
As Diarmuid waits for her to arrive, he sits and casually twists flowers together into chains and rings as a way to relax and pass time. Tohko is already late and he hopes that is just because she is taking time to lose the new 'friend' he hears she has picked up. Despite being proud of the fact she is not letting the dangers involved with being a part of the resistance stop her, Diarmuid can't help but worry that someday she will get in way over her head and not be able to find her way back out.
Floor 3 (Closed to Waver,fionnuisce and Sephiroth, pinnaculum ):
(OOC: Is a posting order of Diarmuid -> Waver -> Sephiroth okay?)
As Diarmuid enters the library and looks around for Sephiroth or Waver, there is excitement in his eyes. Ever since he had heard from Sephiroth that the printing press is working, he has been looking forward to learning how to use it. Well, honestly he doesn't care so much for the workings of the machine itself like Waver might. What he does care about is the fact that learning to use it is one big step forward toward getting the information he and the others have gathered about the dangers of the tower's floors out to the public. Add in the fact that Waver is going to be learning it with him since he and Sephiroth seem to get along so well and Waver has an interest in the machine anyway, and it is shaping up to be a wonderful way to spend the afternoon.
Diarmuid's just going to have to keep reminding himself that Waver probably won't appreciate having ink smeared on him, because for some reason the image of the magus with ink smeared all over his face just keeps popping into his head...
Any Floor (Open):
(OOC: Feel free to use this prompt not only if you want to have you character catch Diarmuid leaving the information sheets around, but also if you would like your character to find and comment on one!)
Diarmuid just can't stop smiling. Not only had learning the printing press gone well, but the rough drafts of the floor information that he is holding in his hands as a result are a huge step forward for the project. It doesn't matter that right now the papers are missing some of the information that has been gathered and the map that Saber has been working on. It is still progress.
On the sheet he is looking at, the floors have been divided into three groups--floors that are completely safe, floors that are safe as long as you are careful or have some kind of fighting skill, and floors that are dangerous even for those who are highly trained in fighting. Each floor has a short summary of what it is and its dangers if there are any. It is a commonsensical way to organize things, but the set up and the limitations of the printing press mean that there isn't nearly as much information on it as he would like. Organization is something he will definitely have to discuss with everyone once they gather together again. In the meantime, he has put his name and room number on the dozen or so copies he has along with a request that any suggestions for improvement be sent to him.
After giving the sheets one more look over, Diarmuid heads off to start leaving them around the tower. His limited number means he has to be selective, so he focuses on leaving them on well traveled floors like the library, cafeteria, gym and lounges. He also leaves them near some of the more dangerous floors, all in places where he can easily check on them when he patrols next to see if he can get some idea of how quickly they are going to disappear. The information will be important later when they are deciding how many copies to make and where to leave them.
Floor 39 (Open):
After dropping off the last of the information sheets and finishing his patrol for the day, Diarmuid is still too excited to retire for the night, so he instead stops by the gym. Anyone who has fought with him before or has watched him practice will notice that his movements seem different than usual. There is a lightness and a joy to them now that makes him even more fun to watch. Without any real rhyme or reason he switches back and forth between practicing with his spear and the two swords he is carrying.
It's been a long time since he has felt this good. He has no idea how long the feeling will last, but he is being careful to memorize it so that when the darkness descends again like it always does in this place, he will have that to hold onto--to remind him that even if the progress may be slow, it is there. Someday they will be freed of all of this, and he has to be strong enough to make sure that not only do his friends make it there, he does as well because he friends will not be satisfied with anything else.
And for the first time in a long time, he won't be either.
tohko_amano ) and Waver Velvet (fionnuisce ) & Sephiroth (pinnaculum ).Setting: Floor 100, 39 (the Gym), 25 (the Meadow), 3 (the Library), and others.
Format: Any!
Summary: Diarmuid takes care of some loose ends, moves ahead some projects, and does some much needed thinking.
Warnings: None right now. Will update if that changes.
Note: Title quote credit to Anthony Liccione.
Floor 100 (Open):
For a long time after he started spending time here, Diarmuid had spent most of his time near the image of his house losing hours playing a game between himself and the floor seeing how well it actually had recreated the place he loved so much. After a while, though, he had started to move out and away from the house, through the yard, passed the training grounds and the dog kennels, and finally to the forest that had stood guard behind his house. Diarmuid had been disappointed to find that the illusion stopped a few feet into the treeline and thus short of where the stream had flowed, but it did go far enough back to include one of his favorite thinking spots from his first life.
The spot itself is nothing fancy. Just a small clearing with two trees leaning in toward each other shading a large rock with their branches. Of course, here he cannot sit upon or lean against the rock as he had so often done in the past, but he has found the perfect place to sit so that he can still imagine that is what he is doing. And so, it is here near the treeline that he has taken to sitting to think once he had lost the ability to do so in his room.
It seems to Diarmuid that almost all he has done lately is think, but at the same time, he has so much to think about. So much has happened to him so quickly over the last few months that he is honestly surprised he can still function. Nothing during his first life had prepared him for anything like this--this constant opening of old wounds and giving of new ones before the first had any time to heal. It is almost like the nightmare that had started when his master had ordered him to kill himself just had never ended.
Yet, there are bright points. A great many of them and that is why Diarmuid is so determined to finally get his mind straightened out. It will take time, he knows, but it will also take him finally forcing himself to believe so many of the things he has realized through his talks with others. Things Diarmuid has asked others to do, but always seems to forget to ask himself to do.
He has told both Cecil and Waver that he knows he holds himself to higher standards than others and really needs to stop. Everyone is equal in the tower. Everyone has had their souls taken from their bodies and placed into false forms. There is no reason for him to expect so much more from himself especially when expecting so much only sets him up for failure.
He has told Suzaku, Ryoji, and Mami that everyone makes mistakes and that making them doesn't make them any less of a person. As long as they don't stop fighting and don't let the mistakes beat them, there is always a chance to find forgiveness.
He has told Yata that 'knight' is just a label. It doesn't matter if others believe that is what you are as long as you know what you are in your heart and act to serve the best way you can.
And he has told his brother and Hidetoshi that he knows he is in a rut of negative feelings. He just has to find his way out.
That is why Diarmuid is spending so much time here just thinking and watching the illusionary trees move in the breeze. Sometimes he's meditating on things using a technique that Oisin taught him so very long ago. Sometimes he has actually dozed off during his thoughts and sometimes, soft singing in ancient Gaelic can be heard drifting across the floor as he unconsciously releases his emotions in a way that so many around him did when he was young.
Floor 25 (Closed to Tohko,
tohko_amano ):He picked the meadow as the place where he wanted to meet with Tohko because it is one of the few floors where it isn't unusual for people to meet and talk. It is safe, large enough that several groups can be talking in it without bothering each other, and also has plenty of room away from the walls and the prying eyes of any devices the Administrators might be using to spy on them. With the loss of the sauna as a place to safely discuss things like the resistance--he has seen the units working there and guessed that some of the information that had been discovered by Jason's little ploy must have been about the lack of cameras on that floor--they've had to make due the best they can.
As Diarmuid waits for her to arrive, he sits and casually twists flowers together into chains and rings as a way to relax and pass time. Tohko is already late and he hopes that is just because she is taking time to lose the new 'friend' he hears she has picked up. Despite being proud of the fact she is not letting the dangers involved with being a part of the resistance stop her, Diarmuid can't help but worry that someday she will get in way over her head and not be able to find her way back out.
Floor 3 (Closed to Waver,
fionnuisce and Sephiroth, pinnaculum ):(OOC: Is a posting order of Diarmuid -> Waver -> Sephiroth okay?)
As Diarmuid enters the library and looks around for Sephiroth or Waver, there is excitement in his eyes. Ever since he had heard from Sephiroth that the printing press is working, he has been looking forward to learning how to use it. Well, honestly he doesn't care so much for the workings of the machine itself like Waver might. What he does care about is the fact that learning to use it is one big step forward toward getting the information he and the others have gathered about the dangers of the tower's floors out to the public. Add in the fact that Waver is going to be learning it with him since he and Sephiroth seem to get along so well and Waver has an interest in the machine anyway, and it is shaping up to be a wonderful way to spend the afternoon.
Diarmuid's just going to have to keep reminding himself that Waver probably won't appreciate having ink smeared on him, because for some reason the image of the magus with ink smeared all over his face just keeps popping into his head...
Any Floor (Open):
(OOC: Feel free to use this prompt not only if you want to have you character catch Diarmuid leaving the information sheets around, but also if you would like your character to find and comment on one!)
Diarmuid just can't stop smiling. Not only had learning the printing press gone well, but the rough drafts of the floor information that he is holding in his hands as a result are a huge step forward for the project. It doesn't matter that right now the papers are missing some of the information that has been gathered and the map that Saber has been working on. It is still progress.
On the sheet he is looking at, the floors have been divided into three groups--floors that are completely safe, floors that are safe as long as you are careful or have some kind of fighting skill, and floors that are dangerous even for those who are highly trained in fighting. Each floor has a short summary of what it is and its dangers if there are any. It is a commonsensical way to organize things, but the set up and the limitations of the printing press mean that there isn't nearly as much information on it as he would like. Organization is something he will definitely have to discuss with everyone once they gather together again. In the meantime, he has put his name and room number on the dozen or so copies he has along with a request that any suggestions for improvement be sent to him.
After giving the sheets one more look over, Diarmuid heads off to start leaving them around the tower. His limited number means he has to be selective, so he focuses on leaving them on well traveled floors like the library, cafeteria, gym and lounges. He also leaves them near some of the more dangerous floors, all in places where he can easily check on them when he patrols next to see if he can get some idea of how quickly they are going to disappear. The information will be important later when they are deciding how many copies to make and where to leave them.
Floor 39 (Open):
After dropping off the last of the information sheets and finishing his patrol for the day, Diarmuid is still too excited to retire for the night, so he instead stops by the gym. Anyone who has fought with him before or has watched him practice will notice that his movements seem different than usual. There is a lightness and a joy to them now that makes him even more fun to watch. Without any real rhyme or reason he switches back and forth between practicing with his spear and the two swords he is carrying.
It's been a long time since he has felt this good. He has no idea how long the feeling will last, but he is being careful to memorize it so that when the darkness descends again like it always does in this place, he will have that to hold onto--to remind him that even if the progress may be slow, it is there. Someday they will be freed of all of this, and he has to be strong enough to make sure that not only do his friends make it there, he does as well because he friends will not be satisfied with anything else.
And for the first time in a long time, he won't be either.
no subject
[Diarmuid laughs a little bitterly.]
You haven't had a chance to catch up on recent events have you? How long have you been gone? Did you see Ruana eat Dax?
no subject
[but it sounds wonderful.]
Do tell.
no subject
There is not so much to tell. I believe the video is still on the Network. You would just need to search back to the end of February to find it. Dax tried to help us out and in the end...she killed and ate him for it.
[He looks off to the side for a moment. It's obvious that even though he is a man used to bloody fights seeing such a thing had made him extremely uneasy.]
Zo is apparently taking over Dax's place in the rotation of who is in charge of the tower now.
no subject
And what is this Zo like?
no subject
[Suspicion suddenly tints Diarmuid's words. Battler's comment and easy acceptance of what he had just been told bothers him.
A lot.]
Zo is a child. He is the one who brings our souls here when our worlds are destroyed.
no subject
...So, I have him to thank... for me finding my master then? How interesting, how twisted when one thinks about it.
[he doesn't seem too distressed.]
no subject
[The man is not a servant from a Grail War. Diarmuid can tell that much even if he cannot tell exactly what Battler is. That mood inappropriate smile, though. It reminds him uncomfortably of someone else whose emotions are often not what one would expect for the situation.]
And who would your master be?
no subject
[he chuckles darkly to himself before replying.]
I believe she once called herself Eva, however she prefers to be called Beatrice now.
TMW, you have to go and see if she ever actually gave her name to him... X.x
[If he seemed suspicious or distant before he is downright cold and closed off now. In fact, it takes a great deal of effort to keep from resummoning his spear.]
So you are the Furniture she has mentioned so much to me. The one she wanted me to replace.
literally happens to me all the time LOL
....
...wait.... replaced....?
in an instant the smile dropped from battler's expression and he stared at the other man.]
...Replace? Are you saying that she... wanted you to replace me?
[he was visibly upset, not overly so but there was no other way to explain his expression, the way he frowned, his crimson eyes narrowing.]
Hehh.... I see.
no subject
[Diarmuid doesn't miss the change in Battler's expression though he is not sure exactly what that change might mean in a man like him. Unconsciously, he tenses almost as if he expects the other man to attack him.]
Even though I told her more than once I would not become her Furniture even to full the debt I own her, she still insists upon it saying it is the only thing she wants. Perhaps now that you are here she will finally chose something else so that the debt can be closed.
no subject
[a scowl plagued his features and he soon turned away from the man. no, he wasn't going to attack him, if he wanted him dead he would have done it already. this was just... a shock to him, more so than anything, considering the fact he figured his master had wanted him around the most. so hear that he would have been so easily replaced if this man had accepted the offer...]
I wonder I wonder.... [the grin returned, but there was a sad feeling from it, almost as though there was a pained expression layered beneath it.]
I am her furniture but I am also one that was created to kill, to hurt, to destroy-.... aah... I want to see it now, I want to see what it would be like if she were the one that experienced true pain, to know what it was like to be helpless and simply squirm...!
[he was insane of course, so he felt the need for a little payback.]
You there, Diarmuid, I thank you for this new bit of information. I can tell that you are at odds with my master as well... do not worry for she will soon forget all about that debt.
no subject
[Diarmuid's words are slow. Wary. If he was confused about Battler's reactions before, he is certainly not sure how to feel now. While saying he disliked the Endless Witch would be completely accurate, it had not been his intent to cause her any trouble.
And trouble is sure what Battler seems ready to cause now. Though, as odd as their relationship is--even from what little Diarmuid knows--for all he knows she might end up liking it.
Still, he would really rather not risk her getting mad at him and deciding he owes her another debt for messing with her Furniture. He still remembers that rotting heart she had left in his mailbox the last time he had upset her and despite Battler's assurances, Diarmuid is sure she will not forget the debt he already owes her.]
Are you sure that is a good idea? Masters usually don't take well to their possessions rebelling.
[A bit of...something dark flashes across Diarmuid's eyes, but it is gone fast enough that Battler might completely miss it.]
no subject
alas, he was created by witches, a tool that was supposed to kill and nothing more, so of course he was just a puppet. he saw the man's expression change but he did not falter.]
It's just a simple lesson I can assure you... harmless. [well not really but oh well.]
You secretly would like to see such a show, wouldn't you?
no subject
Nothing between people like you and her is ever harmless. Just try do whatever it is you are going to do where innocent bystanders won't get caught up in things.
And what makes you think I would have any interest in something like that?
no subject
[he smiles sadistically at the thought.]
The darkness in one's heart.... it comes out sooner or later, no one can ever deny it. Are you saying you wouldn't enjoy my master being taught a lesson? Not even the most powerful witch should be able to do whatever she wants.
Especially not.... replace me.... no one ever can.
no subject
[That darkness flashes in his eyes again, stronger this time.]
Vengeance brings nothing but pain to everyone involved. Even those who think it will make them feel better. Especially them...
[His expression lightens slightly toward confusion at Battler's last words.]
Does it upset you so much she might have done so? Do you really think one such as she values anything so much that it is irreplaceable to her?
no subject
...She will soon understand the value of such relations between a master and their servant.
I was created for a single purpose, and after carrying that out I was sent here... my other purpose now is to be hers, and if she wishes to replace me... what will become of someone such as I? Huhuahahaha....! Aah.... it's almost unbearable to think about!
I can't believe he is trying to give a pep talk to someone like Battler! *headdesk*
What do you do? How about take control of your life and find a new purpose? One chosen by you and you alone? Just because they made you and picked a path for your life doesn't mean you have to follow it. Do you truly have no will of your own?
You know well that this place can send people away. What would you do if tomorrow she was sent from this place? Sit on the floor and mope or find a new purpose?
LOL IT'S GREAT i think he needs it either way
[he knows he's just a pawn, just a piece... so would he even live if no one was controlling him?]
And what I want always seems to leave me with no one in the end. They all die.... by my hands.... how fitting.
no subject
[Diarmuid probably shouldn't be trying to understand this man, but there is part of him that cannot help it. Not when he has been the one who has questioned what he would do without a master as well.]
If they all end up leaving you because of the sins of your own hands, it seems to me it is not they who are the master after all, but you. I wonder... How long before those hands turn on their true master?
Though, perhaps since you seem to dislike being alone so much, they already have.
no subject
he dislikes.... being alone. he had known it deep down but when it was actually said by another it took him by surprise. it was the truth however, he didn't want people to leave him, how he was always the one aline every single time, it was so painful to him and yet he would always just laugh, would feel anguish but at the same time such pleasure from it all.
he was a sadist, but was he really a masochist just like his counterpart...?]
....Can a shadow of someone else truly live of their own accord?
[he wonders.]
I asked someone this once and they said that even though I am a copy, a.... replica, was it? That shouldn't matter but.... oh how I hate that counterpart of mine. So can a double really be their own person...? I'm still trying to find the answer to that.
He is but a fool but... hehhh.... I suppose I am one as well... how disgusting...huhuhaha....! Useless... so very useless!
They are so not bonding over common issues here, are they? X.x
[He understands. Forget trying to understand. That question is one that still plagues Diarmuid even though he has been 'himself' in the Tower for how long now.]
I don't know what a replica is, but whoever told you that you are yourself no matter where you originally came from is correct. My friends tell me the same thing no matter how often I feel I am nothing more than a copy and deserve to be treated as such. They are right. As hard as it might be to believe them, they are right. We might have started out as someone else, but we have had or own experiences and made our own choices thousands of times since the moment of our birth.
We are not them any longer.
Do you wish to be a fool? Do you wish to be useless? If not, then stop blaming him for being those things and start changing yourself.
why yes, yes they are :3
battler simply stared at the man as he spoke, as he listened to his tale, his advice, and while he was taking it all- he could only focus on one part of what he was saying.]
.....You..... are a copy as well?
[his voice was low, it seemed as though lancer's words were getting to him.]
This...is a sign of the end of the world, isn't it?
[Diarmuid sighs, running a hand through his hair. Perhaps he shouldn't give so much information about himself to a potential enemy, but he hasn't shied away from telling people who and what he is since arriving. Why start now?]
On my world and those like it, people who acted in such a way during their lives that they could be called heroes have their souls recorded on something called the Throne of Heroes. Those souls, should the world ever been in need, are called back down to earth to fight and deal with the threat. However, according to what my Master told me...
[Ranted at him is more like it, but...]
...it is never the soul itself that is sent down to fight. The risk of something happening to corrupt or taint the soul is too great. Instead, an exact copy is made and sent down in its place. I am one of those copies.
However, when my world was destroyed I should have been on my way back to the Throne to be erased and my energy reunited with the main soul that is the Heroic Spirit Diarmuid Ua Duibhne. How much of that process happened before I was pulled here? I don't know. I believe myself still a just a copy since I remember the war I was called to fight in and were I the original, I should not remember. My friends...they think otherwise. They want to say I am he and that I was just called here before my memories could be completely erased.
Unfortunately, there is really no way to know for sure, and I don't like not knowing. I suppose in the end, that has been what has pushed me forward. If I cannot know what I am, then what is the point in sitting back and asking what he would do? All I can do is decide what I would do.
these two have brought about destruction with their bonding...!!
Evatrice will either be pissed...or thoroughly amused...
(no subject)
(no subject)