towerofanimus | Endgame: Gathered on This Beach of the Tumid River

[Nesir glared at him, she had no ideas. Nothing she could think of to escape from this situation. Which was why she had made the choice to help the others in the first place.

She looked around the streets of Gauig. It had all been so easy back then, she had been given orders and she had followed them. Even if the orders had hurt she could live knowing that she was serving the dark god, and her guardians knew better than she did.

She didn't like having to make the choices and decide for herself what was the better course.

Maybe that was why she this place had been chosen as the place she saw.] Things did never used to be being so complicated.

[He held Nesir's glare, unblinking as was common with such an intense fire in his eyes. Yet this fire was both scalding and cool; hot by his too-easily ignited anger yet something also close to compassion towards Nesir, a minuscule indication that he might sympathize with the outright frustrating nature of the fact that none of them knew really which way to turn to save themselves. Like rats backed into a corner as the encroaching complications barring the way became larger and more all-consuming; he's polite enough to avert his gaze from that glare as she looks around this floor again. He has no idea what she sees of course but he thinks he notices something akin to realization set in.

Sephiroth had helped, selflessly enough on the surface, when the last power-issue had plagued the Tower. Indeed he had taken great personal risk to himself in doing so; if he had died then there would be no time for him to gain any freedom from the control of the Administration again before time ran out. It had been too easy to believe that Pandora, and their collared-unit allies, offered the only means of escape when the pieces of his raw ego quivered at every small recollection of his own failure in attempting it for himself. Yet Sephiroth finds himself now severely lacking the confidence needed for him to continue to trust in the ignorance of others and he is angry that he had been so foolish to think he should entertain the notion of trusting any of them in the first place.]

It's always been complicated. Neither you nor me would still be in this situation if it were not.
Only now it's pushed right in our faces and demands action, but to take the wrong action-

[He looks down more pointedly, and away then, though not around as Nesir does, to some focused point on the floor away from them both. There aren't any great sights to behold inside a Mako reactor; all metal grating and it's industrial bearing, with it's dim lighting dominated by the luminescent tank in which his Mother was sealed.

Sephiroth hates this notion and it's scowled down at the floor. That in his own indecisiveness, fueled by ignorance, he'll be forced into action that will forsake all that he has ever stood for. The Tower of Animus would then win for sure, having collapsed his identity from the inside.]

I do just be wishing it did be being simple. [But nothing ever was, not anymore. It scared her that despite all his power Sephiroth was as helpless as she was, that he did not have any more answers than her.]

But we can no be doing nothing, those who do no be fighting for their futures do no be deserving to be living them.

Don't I know it.

[And really he does. Sephiroth has every intention to fight. Only not that particular fight that everyone else is pawing at. Once he's ready, and he sees his opening he will fight with all that he has. Until then he'll maintain his silent contemplation and his stalwart observing.

So what if it seems like he's putting his head in the sand.]

[She looked around again before her gaze settled back on Sephiroth] What do you be planning to be doing?

[-Yet he's still looking at the floor as if the answer might be down there somewhere. It certainly looks like he's searching somewhere on it for a few moments, not really staring all that directly at one point any more.]

The Tower is quiet now, all except for within one block. Even the Dormitories are mostly deserted, I find.

Battle lines are drawn and I intend to get behind the advance.

[He words it carefully, though nods after wards, happy enough with the expression. His voice is still quiet but really, he's in two minds whether he cares if they are being monitored here still.]

[Nesir nodded thoughtfully though his careful wording was slightly infuriating. Understandable but annoying. She was used to such things, her whole life had been full of secrets and things not said clearly. But sometimes she wished it wasn't.

She gave a slightly bitter laugh, annoyed at herself for thinking such stupid thoughts.] I do be seeing.

[Carefully worded only not out of any desire to deceive Nesir, Carefully worded as if Sephiroth isn't too sure how to clearly phrase his thoughts at this point - yet leave them vague enough just in case.

Another long pause later Sephiroth blinks up from looking at the floor and inspects Nesir's face again. He tilts his head a little to one side, silver hair falling away at one side of his face.]

One way or the other, this may well be one of the last times we will talk together.

[That....stings at him more than he's ever going to give it credit for.]

[She blinked, she hadn't thought of that. That whatever happened win or lose she would never see him again, never see anyone again. Not from here.

She would go back to her own world or she would die, but she definitely didn't feel like the same acolyte who had arrived at this tower and she couldn't have been more different than the child who had once found solace on the rooftops of Gauig.] It might be being... You do no be having any great wisdom to be passing to me then? [A weak attempt at humour, but an attempt nonetheless.]

[Sephiroth too, has come a long way in himself since that fateful day when he learned for once and for all the truth of his origins; that surrounds him on this floor. Though a great deal of it has not been in a positive direction. He imagines himself more splintered now, with his sanity cracked cleanly down the middle and that in itself is the epitome of his stinging failure towards his Mother. Not least the fact that he's still contained here at all, that he hasn't found a way. That he still might not.

Thinking about it pulls at emotions too strained over the edge of his surface mask to be kept hidden. He half-turns away from Nesir and affords that stasis tank another longing glance. Reassuring himself most importantly that it's not over yet.]

I think I- [He stares into the face of Jenova for a few more seconds before looking down and to his side at Nesir again.] I told you before.

Never lose sight of what, or who you are. Letting this place change you irreparably, delivers her victory by default.

[Never lose sight of what she was, the problem was she didn't know what she was anymore. A temple acolyte, a tool of the shadow. A resident of this tower, part of Ganondorf's group. Lotte's future Warrior.

All of those things and none of them, she stared at her hands for a moment, and touched the space where her missing fingers should be before she looked up] Kant did always be saying that changing do be growing, if you can be being in a place a year and no be changing then you did no be learning.

[Yet again Sephiroth turns slightly more towards Nesir, watching her carefully as she fingers her missing finger spaces. Then meeting her eyes again, only fleetingly before breaking eye contact.]

There can not be any real growth here.

[Not that Sephiroth would accept that he himself has also changed, in ways he doesn't want to draw attention to.]

[Nesir continued looking at him even as he broke eye contact] Do you be saying that in all the time you did be being here you did be learning nothing?

No that's not what I said.

[It's an almost instant reaction. He narrows eyes again, glaring into the floor.]

What use is knowledge about this place, or even the world outside of the Tower when one way or another we won't be here.

That did not be what I did be meaning. I did be meaning about yourself about life, there do be many things that do be being things you can be taking with you.

Such as?

[Sephiroth's head remains inclined towards the floor despite the fact he can feel Nesir's face boring into his head. What exactly had he stood to learn, in the first place, about life that he's spent a recent lifetime distancing himself from.

In that, he hasn't changed. Sephiroth still retains a large over-bearing shadow of his former existence and why should he change? He has his Destiny still to fulfill and not even a horror tower would divert him from that path.]

I do no be knowing. But surely even gods do be growing and learning, or what do even be being the point.

I have learned-

[He started, but slipped into a silence again. He couldn't resist then to raise his gaze again to Nesir, searching her as if he might be able to glean what it was she expected him to say. It all didn't mean anything, in the end. The inevitability of this place would come about one way or another regardless.]

-that sometimes even Gods find themselves in a position where they can't really affect anything. I hate it.

[Nesir pulled a face but she nodded] Most people do be hating it I do be thinking. That's why they do be doing stupid things.

[Stupid things. He tries his hardest not to pull a similar type of face back at her. Is his resolve that raw still that he reads everything a person tells him as an attack on him and/or his doings in the Tower?

He tries to force those thoughts towards Pandora. From the first Glamour drop to the way they have pretty much put Aria and her resistance into a position in which they can all wage war against the Administration - he's more convinced than ever of their stupidity.]

They may have already destroyed the only real chance of this ending well, in their blindness.

Perhaps. [She shrugged] But maybe you did be doing the same, in your blindness.

[He wants to shrug it off, to dismiss Nesir as not knowing what she's talking about but in the larger scheme of things she's right. Sephiroth only knows what he had researched and theorized within himself and formulated his plot through that; he hadn't planned for the outcome, of still being contained within the Tower.

The feel of his influence coursing around the Tower had certainly felt tangible enough. Sephiroth trusted what his soul held felt in that time, and hadn't cared what state he felt in behind in. In fact, it might not have worked all as well as it did if he'd had second thoughts.]

It's true that I had no real thought for what I left behind. But I was not blind in the attempt.

[His tone reflects his stern certainty. Right or wrong, Sephiroth knows what he experienced.]

There must have been a blindness or you would have been succeeding. [She held up a hand to show she meant no disrespect- or at least no more than usual]

No one can ever be knowing everything, but you do be still having to be trying anyways. That's what I did be trying to say before.

[There is very little Nesir can do to stop Sephiroth from feeling that particular jolt of acid to the back of his throat whenever his failing is brought up. Never mind that he's spent an enormous amount of time going over and over it again subconsciously. He narrows his expression accordingly but manages not to scowl further than that.]

You're right. I hadn't understood Zo, most of all.

Didn't stop me from trying, and for as temporary as it was- I did succeed.

You did be. [She nodded] And others might be succeeding, if only for a moment, it do be being better than nothing.

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