Endgame: This Broken Jaw of Our Lost Kingdoms; Part One

[animusmods]

Characters: open to those trapped in cells
Setting: the cells
Format: any
Summary: Those left abandoned in the Tower have some time to speak to each other. In the middle of the room, a clock counts down...
Warnings: general animus endgame warnings

Comments

[warriorscribe]

*Enoch glances over at the source of the voice. This tower's gotten to him... He lets out a little sigh.*

Forgive me, but I don't think you of all people should be saying her madness excludes her from being treated like a person.

[doctor_dismemberment]

[What was that? Does Richtofen detect a hint of sass coming out of Enoch's stupid, pretty mouth? His first reaction is a wordless scream, because he can't organize his thoughts enough to put them into words. He kicks out at the wall, and the pain that shoots up his leg is enough to force some sort of order back into his throat.]

Lost her chances! So-- So many times--

[He buries his face in his hands. What Enoch's saying rings painfully true. How many people has he killed, tortured, maimed? Even when he wasn't the one to pull the trigger, he's sent countless people to their deaths (for them, the voices and their fucking pyramid, collecting souls just like Ruana), and thought of it as no more than a means to an end.

Even when he tried to pretend to be nice, nobody believed him. Nobody trusted him. He used up his own chances a long time ago. He's going to die never learning what trust is or where it comes from, he's going to die with nobody but the voices to keep him company, he's going to die he's going to die he's going to die--

He shrieks again. Without realizing it, he's started to rock back and forth and claw at his face, at the back of his head. His hat lays discarded on the floor next to him, and the leather of his gloves squeaks in his ears, sounding a million times louder than it has any right to.]

[warriorscribe]

*When he screams, Enoch rises to his knees, a hand going to the barrier of his cell with a concerned shout, wordless. He hadn't been intending to hurt him so severely with that. In his experience, most people like Richtofen weren't self-aware enough...

But, no...it sounds as if it was more than a simple "you're not sane, yourself" that he's reacting to. Would he really be screaming so loudly if that's all there was?*

Stop, stop! You're both people, that's what I meant! You don't get "chances" at being a person.

[doctor_dismemberment]

[Richtofen sucks in ragged breaths, feeling as if his lungs are on fire. His fake lungs. The ones he's been tricked into thinking he has, when really it's all wireframe and fluid and a soul that he never truly believed he had.]

H-how can you say that? [His voice is trembling. For once in his life, Richtofen sounds honestly, miserably scared.] We're nothing. They're nothing. Soon we-- will all be nothing, don't you see the ticking und tocking? Cannot live without a body...

[warriorscribe]

We are ourselves. That's not "nothing".

*But that's all he can really say. Because he doesn't know what happens, really, when even the soul's gone. He's afraid of truly being nothing, too. But he won't say that. He has to at least stand strong here, in his last moments.*

[doctor_dismemberment]

["We are ourselves?" What does that mean? Richtofen's having a hard time processing the sentence through the madness of racing thoughts in his head. People are... flesh and bone and blood. Molecules and atoms and electrons. Oxygen, carbon, hydrogen, nitrogen, calcium, phosphorous, potassium. Blood cells and brain cells and nerves and senses.

People are not wireframes filled with goo.

But they have souls, don't they? There are no scientific studies about those. Richtofen feels lost, hopelessly and truly, unable to fall back on evidence or experiments about the soul. Can it be destroyed? Can it be altered? It can be moved, certainly, they've all found that out, but moving is not a comfort if you'll only be pursued by a predator.]

I am me und you are you... [He stands up, turns sharply on his heel, and starts pacing in tiny circles, as much as he can manage in such a small cell.] What is nothing? Nothing is nothing. But that does not matter if we die-!

[It makes sense to him.]

[warriorscribe]

But right now, we are not dead. Right now, we still exist.

*He searches the cells in his view for a friend. Even he wouldn't know, would he, what would happen were their souls to be lost?* And if we die, nothing will change the fact that we did exist. This moment, and all the moments before it, they happened. Only someone who can rewrite time can change that.

...I don't think she quite knew what she was getting herself into. Even if she's won, we've left a mark.

[doctor_dismemberment]

[Richtofen is silent for a long moment. Even the voices in his head have settled into a low rumble, not unlike the crashing of waves against the sand. He rests his head on his knees and gets so lost in thought, anyone looking at him might think he's fallen asleep.

I am me, you are you, killherkillherkiller, we still exist, frames and liquid carbon and nitrogen, everything happened, even if she's won even if she's won even if she--]

Nngh... No! [He sits bolt upright, wearing a toothy smile.] She won't win! Right? Ahaha! Bad little monsters never win against the doctor!

[Wow. Enoch's inspirational speech actually worked on Sergeant Crazy. It really must be the apocalypse.]

[warriorscribe]

*She might have already won, if there's no way out of these cells. But seeing he managed to actually inspire hope in Richtofen, well...no. He won't say it. He wants to believe they can still win, too, in fact.*

That's right. We'll find a way.