[OPEN] alas, my children

[andajarofdirt]

Characters: Jack, Jack & you.
Setting: Floor 42
Format: Starting action, but I'll match you either way.
Summary: In which Jack - the monkey - is being a pest, and Jack - the pirate - wants his goddamn hat back. 
Warnings: Jack Sparrow being Jack Sparrow. Also, creepy undead monkey and potential shooting of it.

JACK!

[Captain Jack Sparrow does not usually scream. Or screech. Or lose his cool, composed air of sophisticated pirate lord. In other words, he's usually too busy pretending to be drunk to do much, really. But sometimes a man must take a stand. Sometimes, there's a monkey involved. Sometimes, a hat is in danger.]

Bugger all, you little pest. I'm gonna shoot yer brains out, see if I don't!

[Sometimes, when an undead monkey steals your hat and runs away into a floor made of shifting, moving bars, you think "oh god, why" or "I bet you all this is God's way of getting back at me about the priest thing" and "I really did think it was a brothel, mate, it's a common mistake to make!" When you're Jack Sparrow, though, the reaction is more along the lines of profuse pirate swearing before chasing after it. Into the bars. Which is where your character will find him, balancing around half drunkenly, moving along and trying to reach the monkey with the hat, pistol at hand. He can't shoot the monkey because then his hat will fall off, but he can certainly chase it.

You know, for someone who's supposedly drunk off his ass - how!? - Jack has an uncanny sense of balance, able to run and jump and otherwise chase around after the undead, chittering monkey with relative ease.]

I will make bullets outta your bones, Jack, to make up for the ones you make me waste!

Comments

[immortalia]

[ Wait, what was this? As she was going to get materials for a variety of projects, Sertoria noticed Jack running after...a monkey. Normally, she wouldn't bat an eye at the behavior, but she does notice that Jack - the human - was losing his composure.

Welp, now he has her attention. So, she'll place her items down and run after the both of them to where the room was. She stops before she falls down, though, and observes the both of them squabbling. ]

...Jack? Do you request assistance?

[andajarofdirt]

[Monkey and pirate scramble about, balancing on the bars and running around the room in circles. Jack doesn't stop when Sertoria appears or speaks.]

Got it covered, darling, don't worry your pretty head about it.

[And then he dives, and misses and slides and twists his body until he's holding onto the bar, scrambling up to his feet as it started to shift. The monkey chittered loudly, amused at it.]

Laugh while you can, yeah, I'LL GET YOU YET.

[immortalia]

[ Sertoria will sigh and decide to jump and balance all of her weight flawlessly on the bars as if she was an acrobat. She soon comes to where Jack is and looks down at him. ]

Perhaps my assistance is required. Maybe the monkey will reply to positive reinforcement instead of negative.

[andajarofdirt]

[Jack rolls back to his feet, swaying again.]

Sure, you do that. But I reserve the right to stand here and laugh loudly when it doesn't work.

[Jack for his part, makes himself pitiful and small looking, clutching the hat and curling in a corner of the room, big eyes looking at Sertoria.]

[immortalia]

You would be surprised how much positive reinforcement does work.

[ Oh, my. Is that sass coming from her?

But, nevertheless, she'll jump over to where Jack the Monkey is and kneels down to his level. ]

If I give you an apple, will you please give me the hat?

[divinitysoiled]

[There's a lovely dark woman watching this happen. Catarina came to explore, wondering what kind of tower this place was. She didn't expect to see a scruffy man fighting with a monkey, though it was quite amusing to watch. Her hand came up to her mouth as she laughed, not even bothering to get involved]

Ah, humans.

[andajarofdirt]

[Jack pauses, balancing on the bar and swaying back and forth.]

Lady, what kind of men you spend time with, if you think that is human?

[As if to answer, Jack jumped up and down in place, holding tight onto the hat, and screeched.]

[divinitysoiled]

True. From my vantage point, it rather looks like two monkeys scurrying about. [Catarina holds a hand out to the monkey Jack]

[andajarofdirt]

Harsh, love, so harsh.

[Jack gives her a mock wounded look, while the monkey bounces up and down, looking at her warily.]

[divinitysoiled]

Merely my views. [She smiles, which, yeah, really shows just how wild she runs under the surface. It shows too much teeth, almost baring them]

[scorchedchivalry]

[Saber was exploring the Tower and stopped at the entrance to the floor to watch this odd sight for a few moments. The knight in black armor was... amused.]

How is it that a monkey bests a man?

[andajarofdirt]

[Jack slides and sways on a bar, stepping into another as he goes, effortlessly keeping his balance.]

Now, love, don't be hasty, no one has bested no one.

[Jack chittered loudly, as if to protest.]

You shut up, no one's talking to you.

[The monkey made a taunting sound and Jack glowered at it.]

I will shoot you, see if I don't, I will shoot you and the entire damn Tower will cheer.

[scorchedchivalry]

I am afraid I must side with the monkey. It is leading you on a foolish game of chase, possessing superior agility.

[andajarofdirt]

You misunderstand.

[Jack offers a dashing smile.]

The only thing it's doing is asking very nicely to be shot.

[scorchedchivalry]

[That dashing smile is met by a pair of cold pale yellow eyes. Jack's charms may be better saved for another.]

Then shoot it.

[myblueskies]

Over here! [Romeo jumps across the bars, beckoning the monkey towards him. He is nimble, the bars aren't that different to running over the rooftops of Milano. He's a little out of practice; there are no roofs in the tower, but he likes this floor.]

You leave him alone sir!

[Because the drunk adult is obviously the one to blame.]

[andajarofdirt]

Oi, oi, oi.

[Jack glowers a little.]

I will leave him alone when he leaves me alone!

[myblueskies]

You're the one shooting him! He's a monkey he can't hurt you! [He reaches out for Jack, giving human Jack a bigger glare] So you just leave him alone sir okay!

[andajarofdirt]

I will stop shooting him when he stops making my life hard!

[Yes, Jack will now argue with Romeo, rather than chase Jack. The monkey, unmoved by this display of good will, scurries away from both, clutching the hat like a lifeline.]

[myblueskies]

[Well at least he's leaving the monkey alone. Mission accomplished.] You shouldn't shoot people at all sir! It's not a nice thing to do!

[songofsoaring]

[Link completely understands the need to keep one's hat with them. He'd managed to get a green one that looked like his old one it wasn't made by Saria, though and so when he saw what was going on, he began his own balancing act in an attempt to get Jack to bring him the hat so could return it to Jack.]

Hey, Mister Monkey! Come on over here, okay?

[andajarofdirt]

[Jack, being Jack, clutched the hat tighter and then made a loud noise, showing off all his teeth at Link. Friendly, the monkey is not.]

You're wasting yer time, lad, can't reason with the little pest.

[songofsoaring]

[Link totally expected monkeys to be friendly.]

He's not a pest! He's probably just scared, Mister.

[The boy was having quite the time keeping his balance, being only three feet tall meant having very short legs and jumping from bar to bar more often to stay up.]

Come on, Mister Monkey. No one's going to hurt you.

[andajarofdirt]

I will.

[Jack muttered, in reply to Link's last statement, glowering darkly.]

And he's not scared. He's a bloody undead monkey, he's got nothing to be scared of!

[A pause.]

Except me, because I will make bullets out of your bones, Jack.

[songofsoaring]

Undead?

[So the monkey was a monster?]

It doesn't look like monster, Mister.

[But Link was being more cautious as he started to move toward the animal.]