A'huntin we will go~

[sacred_flamer]

Characters: Luke fon Fabre and YOU
Setting: Floor Six (until he realizes how dangerous it is), and then Floor Thirty-Two.
Format: You decide.
Summary: Luke needs warmer clothes and something other than nutrition bars to eat. Naturally, this leads to so much fail.
Warnings: Luke. Failing. AT EVERYTHING.

[There was a soft rustle from the underbrush on floor six, and if you looked closely, you might see a head of red hair snooping around. He's being surprisingly quiet for one so loud, and if you stick around long enough, you'll get to see why.]

[There's a few deer lurking around, minding their own business, and Luke is heading straight for them. He keeps himself quiet, waiting... and then he leaps from his hiding place, sword brandished and eyes squeezed shut as he aims to behead one of the deer...!]

[...but the deer are having none of that. One with a medium size rack of antlers snapped its head toward Luke, baring its teeth and letting out a dangerous, not-very-deer-like growl. He somehow fumbled in mid-air, landing on his butt as the other deer turned on him, letting out similar noises. A startled, "Meep!" escaped from him as he scooted back on his behind, before finally flailing up to his feet.]

[This was the second batch that did that! This was so not a nice forest!]

[Later on, on floor thirty-six, you'll get to see him doing much of the same... with the same amount of success. Clearly, Luke fails at this whole "hunting" thing, and needs a mentor (or someone to mock him).]

Comments

[bloodyashes]

[Patience, patience, Asch, stop wincing at every little noise.

He settles a bit near a low point in the bushes - a high-jumping deer would clear it easily, but most predators would have a hard time of it, which makes it the most probable escape route in this direction.

And if the deer decide to attack his replica instead, well, he can pull a rescue from here, too.

Shedding his cloak so it doesn't get in the way, Asch draws his blade and flicks against the connection. Ready when you are, Luke.]

[sacred_flamer]

[Just because Luke was serving as the distraction, didn't mean he wasn't at least going to try to get one himself. He jumped out of the brush with a loud battle cry, his sword coming down toward the deer closest too him. The creature jerked away, its companions heading straight for Asch as the one Luke had targeted pranced back, looking unsure of what it should do next.]

[bloodyashes]

[Don't get carried away now, Luke.

The first deer gets past, but the second winds up with a deep slash across the throat - yeah, that's right beast, you try backpedaling in midair, it's not happening.

With one down, the rest scatter in all directions. Asch looks down at the kill, satisfied, before standing from behind the bushes to look at Luke.]

[sacred_flamer]

[Well, Luke was trying; didn't necessarily mean he would succeed. One of the bucks had stayed behind to protect the does, going at Luke with its antlers. Luke... well, he looked scared, and that was to be expected, but he was holding his ground fairly well, despite the fact he was fighting with a sword that was making cracking noises...]

[...probably because the tip was broken off.]

[bloodyashes]

[He'd noticed the broken blade before, and made a note to give Luke hell for it later, but...

Honestly.

Here comes Asch over the bushes to your rescue, Luke, all the while hoping that those deer aren't going to cannibalize his kill while his back is turned on top of everything.]

Would it kill you to not be stupid every time I take my eyes off you?!

[sacred_flamer]

Would it kill you not to distract me!?

[Luke let out a grunt of frustration, swinging his sword down hard enough to break off a few branches of the deer's antlers. It did nothing but piss it off though, and he ended up having to dive out of the way as it charged for him.]

[bloodyashes]

[He just rolls his eyes, more focused on the attacking stag than on Luke. Asch's blade clangs against the beast's antlers, shooting painfully into his shoulder. He winds up needing both hands to push it away.

The animal dances back from the new arrival, circling around to watch and growl at the unbroken blade held towards it. Asch risks eyeballing Luke over his shoulder.]

You could have at least gone for a doe.

[sacred_flamer]

It went for me, dammit!

[Luke climbed up to his feet, readying himself as well. Sorry, original, but you're getting help even if he has to shove it down your throat.]

[bloodyashes]

[By all means, Luke, give it your best shot. Even without the connection open, Asch can read Luke's movements easily enough, so he just makes a small gesture for Luke to take the lead.

The deer is giving them A Look. It is a look of reassessing whether fighting is a good idea. Better strike fast, if you're going to strike at all.]

[sacred_flamer]

[Luke moved carefully, circling around... before taking a cheap shot at the deer, driving it toward Asch.]

[bloodyashes]

[Replica you are a little shit.

The deer startles in Asch's direction, and the redhead moves in quickly, circling slightly to cut it off. A slash - and there's more blood on his blade, another dead deer crumpling from the wound to its neck.]

[sacred_flamer]

[Hey, this is called working together; he drove it toward Asch, Asch killed it. What is wrong with this picture?]

[Luke let out a breath, falling back in relief. Wow, two dear in one go... this was pretty awesome.]

[bloodyashes]

[You are so frustrating he doesn't even know sometimes.]

Don't celebrate yet. We still have to get these downstairs.

[And he is not carrying both of them.]

[sacred_flamer]

Shouldn't we skin and... t-take them apart here?

[He swallowed; yeah, he said he would do this, but the thought of ripping the meat off a deer... his stomach did a backflip, totally.]

[bloodyashes]

Don't be stupid. It'll be easier to get all the meat to the kitchen while it's still inside a body.

[Plus all the knives are down there.]

[sacred_flamer]

All right...

[Luke shoved his sword into its sheath, before bending down, attempting to lift the buck Asch just killed onto his shoulders.]

[...]

[...wow, deer were heavy.]

[bloodyashes]

[Yes, Luke, that's why they're good for hunting.]

I'll meet you at the stairs.

[And then he's off to gather his cloak and the first kill - oh, good, nothing's been eating it.]

[sacred_flamer]

R-right...!

[And heave...ho! OhLoreleihisbackow. Luke flinched, shifting the deer around until it was comfortable over his shoulders. Oh god, he had to walk down stairs like this? This was so not going to be cool.]

[bloodyashes]

[And by the time Luke gets over there, Asch is already waiting, cloak and deer alike slung over his shoulders -

Don't feel bad, Luke, he's more used to this than you. He used all his money to buy help from the Dark Wings ok there wasn't much left over for food.]

[sacred_flamer]

[...yeah, make it look easy. Creep.]

[Luke grunted, but managed to keep himself from falling over as they headed down the stairs, and keep himself from getting crushed as well.]

[Somehow.]

[bloodyashes]

[... Well, he'll save you a little suffering.]

If you balance the weight across both shoulders, it's easier.

[sacred_flamer]

It's kinda hard with the rack on this thing...

[Seriously, the head is flopping around all over the place, and it really smells.]

[bloodyashes]

[Get used to the smell, Luke, it doesn't exactly disappear when the hide is cured.]

Just watch that it doesn't get hooked on doorways.

[sacred_flamer]

Ngh...

[He's trying, that's why he's walking a little more carefully.]

[bloodyashes]

[Just for you, Asch will handle the door to the kitchen, holding it open at least long enough for Luke to get a shoulder through.]