towerofanimus | [ open ] oh love of mine, would you condescend to help me

Entry tags:

[ open ] oh love of mine, would you condescend to help me

Characters: Urotsuki and OPEN!
Setting: Dormitory hallways, cafeteria, floor 49 (mirror maze).
Format: Action.
Summary: Kidou goes missing. Guess who doesn't take it particularly well after her search for him turns up nothing.
Warnings: Nothing for the first prompt, for the second one gore, use of a chainsaw. Possible harm for characters but not very likely, see the ooc note!

( dormitories or cafeteria )

[ It doesn't matter what you're doing - standing around or sitting and eating in the cafeteria or just passing through either of the locations - but there's still a teenage girl that will try to stop you by tugging on your sleeve, more insistent if you don't slow down or stop. If you do, though, she'll hold up a (pretty poorly drawn) picture of a young boy. She doesn't say any other word, as if that already should be enough to prompt a reaction.. ]

( floor fourty-nine )

[ It's useless. At first she thought he might be staying away after what happened last month, but after a while it became unbearable and she had to seek him out. But it didn't seem like he was anywhere - not in his room, not on any of the floors, not seen by anyone. She's been looking for a day or two or more - it's difficult to even keep count of it by now in the middle of her mental panic. Because Kidou not being in the tower means that he isn't around anymore, that he left, that he isn't with her-- and that thought breaks her more than anything else ever could.

She doesn't even know what to do. Completely mindless she drags herself up the tower until she arrives at the mirror maze, standing still for a moment and staring at her own reflection in the mirror. She isn't sure why, she doesn't even think, but somehow it annoys her, that reflection. Her standin there, all alone-- normally it doesn't bother her, but right now..

Urotsuki gets out her chainsaw.

.. If a character walks onto the floor later they might find a broken mirror near the entrance of the floor. Trails of blood and monster parts are spread out onto the floor if you go in and look through the maze, maybe with another one or two slightly broken mirrors. The sound of a buzzing chainsaw becomes louder and louder the further you get in, and maybe eventually you'll reach Urotsuki - standing in the middle of the maze with monsters around her, lik they're attracted to her. She's covered in scrapes and cuts from the mirror's pieces and with whatever parts came off the monsters too. Almost emotionlessly (but in a different way from her usual blankness, this is much more cold) she cuts cleanly down the middle of a monster with her chainsaw, seemingly the last one. For now, though, they've already been coming for quite a while.

Do you still approach? ]

( ooc: as a note, it's not very likely that Urotsuki will harm people who tag into the second prompt unless they're being an absolute asshole, but if you want to be on the safe side then please tag the first one instead, thanks! )

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

[ Normally he'd stop and interject here to add some provisions onto that "worried." To reassure her and himself that he didn't mean it like that, et cetera. But surrounded by monsters and monster parts while a blank-eyed girl wields a chainsaw, he can set that aside for the moment.

Especially since what she says next explains it. ]

No, this is the first I've heard of that. Will chopping up monsters until the whole place is a mess and you're exhausted bring him back? That's an interesting method.

.. It won't. [ She knows it. Even though she's doing this, she knows it. She knows he won't come back - isn't that exactly why she's doing it?

But even so, the realisation that this won't bring him back is so despairful all the same. So much that she even begins to laugh a little. It's already weird for her to do that normally, but this time it's so hollow, like it's not a laugh because she wants to laugh since she's happy, but more like a sign that something broke up there. ]

Haha.. Yuuto.. won't come back. Hahaha.. No matter what I do..

[ He tenses. He doesn't like that laugh. It's the sort of laugh that someone empty and broken like him should make. Not an innocent girl like her, even if she is awfully strange.

His hands curl tightly around the hilts of his swords, reminding him that someone should probably hold her for comfort, and he can't do any such thing. ]

Yeah, you can't do anything about that.

[ But when he finally speaks his voice is level. ]

There's only one thing you can control: whether you act in a way he would be proud of, so you can smile at him without regrets if you see him again.

But.. I won't see him again, right..? [ She holds on with both her hands to her chainsaw at this point, but they're noticably starting to shake. The weapon shakes along with it as she does so. ]

Yuuto's gone, and.. like I said.. he won't come back. Even if I do something, even if I wish for it, Yuuto won't come back.. People don't come back once they're gone.

[ Like the faint memory of a hospital and a boy - one who also never returned. ]

.. So.. there's no one.. to smile for.

[ He steps forward again, staring at her without flinching. There's something else in that stare for a moment, something prouder and more fearless than usual. ]

But he's still out there somewhere. Somewhere, he is thinking of you. Somewhere, he would want you not to have regrets, and to still smile for him. Isn't that right? He may return, and he may not, but that much is true.

[ And just in case any of that sounded too well-adjusted--he's getting awfully close to the chainsaw now, and he doesn't seem to be particularly afraid she might turn it on him. Actually, he'd probably welcome that. ]

I-.. [ Suddenly her voice rises from that usual completely blank and slightly quiet tone she has. It turns into a downright yell, in fact, there could hardly be a bigger contrast. But the yell is not necessarily angry, if anything, it's more just desperate. ] I don't care about that..!

[ Her chainsaw whirs, although it's not necessarily meant for him, she doesn't want to hurt him. (Right?) But she still has to kill more of those monsters, either that or let them kill her, it's the only solution to all this, the only way to stop feeling all of this and instead just become numb. ]

I don't care if he's just out there-- if he's not here with me, then it doesn't matter..!

You lose people.

[ The glimmer of pride and bravery vanishes from his eyes. ]

That is life, Urotsuki. It might be bothersome, but I won't let you destroy yourself over it.

[ His swords haven't left his hands, and his arms tense now. ]

But.. but... butbutbut.. [ She sounds pretty frantic now, as if she's desperately trying to find words but it's so difficult to even think straight like this to begin with. ] I don't want to lose people..

[ Not again. Kidou here, Tara before, plenty of other friends before. All the people who loved her back home too.. ]

Without people.. it's useless..! What am I just by myself..?! I'm nothing..! I.. it hurts.. it hurts!

[ He's doing okay up until the last part: his eyes empty but the rest of his expression determined. He doesn't know what this business about losing people is, but Urotsuki is some innocent fool who's tried to befriend him, so he'll stay here at her side.

But she says she's nothing, and that it hurts-- ]

You aren't.

[ He might recognize the blankness in her eyes but he refuses to accept it. It's stupid, he should be able to shut it out at this point like he shuts out most everyone else's pain, but he let her just far enough in that it's difficult.

Archer lets the swords disappear from his hands and steps closer. ]

You're still the strange girl who wanders and dreams. Don't say foolish things like, 'I'm nothing.' You're still you!

Then.. why..? Why does it hurt..?

[ She doesn't move. She doesn't step back away from him, even when he comes closer. Instead she keeps standing right where she is, like she's rooted to the very spot she's standing on. ]

Is that what.. "being me" means..? Does being me mean it just hurts..? I.. don't want that.. [ She shakes her head, slowly at first but then more wildly, the tears now fully streaming down her cheeks. ] All this time I was only fine since Yuuto was by my side..!

[ It occurs to Archer that this is the sort of situation where you're normally supposed to hug someone.

He stands there and stares down at Urotsuki as she cries, his fists clenching helplessly at his side.

Words slip out. ]

--you shouldn't cry.

[ It's weird. All this time she couldn't even cry, but now it's like the emotions just keep on slipping out, even though he said she couldn't cry. But she can't help it, she cries all the same. She keeps crying, and her body suddenly feels so incredibly weak and hurt - as if some weird hold over her is broken - that she falls forward so she's on hands and knees on the floor. It's a good thing that no monster seems to be approaching for the moment, since she's too occupied with crying like that. ]

I'm crying since he's gone..!

[ He doesn't know what to do when she cries like that. But he thinks he might know what to do when she falls down. ]

You shouldn't cry, but--

[ He steps in front of her, and then the swords are back in his hands. There aren't any monsters coming, but he decides that if there are, it doesn't matter. ]

Since you're crying anyway, I'll take care of the monsters until you can get up again.

[ .. She raises his face a little, looking up at him. Of course the only thing she can see from her position is his back, but still.. he's standing in front of her.. protecting her, right..? ]

You.. shouldn't. Just.. just leave me here..

Just let me die..!

No. That's not something I'll do...

[ He holds his shoulders straight. Maybe straighter than she's ever seen him stand. Maybe he really seems like he has pride for a moment. ]

Urotsuki, you're not someone who should just die.

Then what should I do..? I've already been facing the pain for so long, this is.. this is too much..! [ She always convinced herself to keep on living, there has to be something else to keep going for-- and she thought she found that in Kidou. But now he's gone, it's too much of an extra kick to an already kicked puppy. ]

This isn't fair..!

The world isn't fair, but--

[ For a moment, he keeps holding his shoulders high, and he almost says, I don't want to let you die, so you'll have to deal with it, or something like that.

But the words crumble away from him before he can say them. He starts to slump a little. He has no right to tell anyone else such a thing. ]

--you should keep living. You're not someone who should give up and die, even if it hurts.

[ His voice is weary. ]

...

[ It takes a moment, but at the weariness of his voice some of her anger and desperation seems to slip away. But it's almost as if it leaves behind some void, some sort of weird numbness and it's audible in her own tone too. ]

So we should just continue doing what hurts.. Going on, even though everyone eventually leaves.. [ .... ] You'll just.. leave too, right..?

Don't assume I'll be allowed to leave.

[ Some bitterness sneaks into his voice before he can shake it off. ]

I too continue doing what hurts.

Why..? [ It's the most basic question to ask in return to hearing that, and she doesn't move from her current spot. ] Why do you continue it..? Don't you want to die..?

[ No one has ever asked him that so simply before. It is, after all, not exactly something normal people ask. Too bad Urotsuki's not normal enough to understand that.

A surprised breath escapes Archer. ]

Yeah, I want to die.

[ He can't lie to her right now. ]

But there are things left to protect here.

[ It's the fact that she's not normal enough that his reply doesn't weird her out. Since she understands, after all, right now she wants to die more than anything too. Just let all of it go..

But.. even so.. he's living? To protect things? ]

What could be so important that you'd live just to protect it..? .. Is there.. anyone you love..?

It isn't about love. It's way simpler than that.

[ He takes a slow breath. ]

I was bound to protect my world from being destroyed. But I selfishly turned my back on that duty and went off to try to find a way to die. While I was doing that, my world was destroyed and I wound up here.

[ Why is he telling her this? She has too innocent a face to hear such things. But she's smiled at him and eaten his food and now she's hurting. He can't lie to her so easily. ]

It seems obvious that I don't have the right to seek death anymore after that, right? So long as there's anything at all left to protect, I have to do that instead.

...

[ It's strange. So strange that she actually - for the tiniest moment here - forgets about her own problems as she instead tries to imagine his situation. Bound to protect a world, but failed.. ]

I don't think.. it's that wrong. If you're hurting and want to die, then that isn't selfish. It's.. normal.. I think. [ Suddenly her tone turns almost surprisingly normal. Even compared to usually. ] I know that you can't just die easily, and that you have to keep going so it might get better, but.. people are only people, right..? They can only take so much.

[ Archer blinks.

He looks at Urotsuki with eyes half-surprised, half-accusing, half-grateful. That's three halves, but he's harkening back to a time when he defied such logics as mathematics, so it's all right.

She's not supposed to tell him it's okay. She's not supposed to forgive him for being himself. People aren't supposed to do that with this mess of a hero. It's just not right...

But it feels kind of nice. ]

I see. Then--it also isn't wrong for you to want to die, but I'll do a selfish thing and wish for you to live anyway.

[ open ] oh love of mine, would you condescend to help me

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